101 South
by jkane180
Summary: Jake's POV from Ch.4 of BD and on in an AU where Jake doesn't wait around to fight the Cullens after they turn Bella. He leaves everything behind, trying to move on with his life and find the one woman who could be his imprint.
1. Part 1 Chapter 1

** A/N:**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight; it owns me. ****Underlined**** text is copied directly from Breaking Dawn.**

** This story picks up in Chapter 4 of Breaking Dawn - Jacob's perspective just after talking to Bella at her wedding. From there it's AU. **

** Imprinting always felt like a lazy way to have Jacob get over Bella. This AU story lets him work through it **_**before**_** he meets his imprint.**

Isabella Marie Swan is going to be the death of me. Ugh! Isabella Marie _Cullen_. I'm sure I've thought that before, but this time was really going to be it.

I considered myself a generally laid-back guy, not counting the whole turning-into-a-werewolf thing. And even _including_ the werewolf thing, I'd always been better at controlling myself than my wolf-brothers.

I thought it would kill me when Cullen came back and Bella ran right back into his arms, not caring at all about me and the months we'd been… well, whatever we had been. I survived it.

Surely I should have died when Bella told me all about the plan to change her into a bloodsucker just like Cullen. I kept breathing.

The agony I felt after kissing Bella, really kissing her, and feeling her kiss me back, and Bella even being able to admit to herself that she truly was in love with me only to choose Cullen – again – would have been enough to kill a lesser man. But my heart kept beating.

Did the pain of hearing that Bella had agreed to marry Cullen kill me? Nope.

Somehow, I had even found the strength to go to Bella's _wedding_, see her in her beautiful white dress, see the happiness on her face now that she was _Mrs. Cullen_. I'd even tried to be good.

I loved Bella so much that I suppressed my urges to ruin the wedding, to kill her new husband, to kidnap Bella and take her somewhere that she would be safe from leeches.

I thought I would make it out of there okay. Surely there was no _new_ way Bella could find to hurt me.

But she's Bella and I'm Jake, so I should have known better.

_Why_ would she tell me about her honeymoon plans?

I'd always trusted that Bella didn't _mean_ to hurt me, so I'd done the same – always doing my best to put my own feelings second and Bella's first.

I couldn't do that anymore – not now that she'd felt the need to rub it in my face that not only would she soon be a leech, not only would she soon be _sleeping_ with Cullen, but she was going to let him fuck her while she was still _human_.

She put my feelings last, telling me this _bullshit_. Her own feelings and safety came next up on the list, apparently, leaving a _parasite_ at the top. Bella would do _anything_ to please him, even let him kill her.

I wanted to kill him. More than ever.

When I'd thought that he loved her and wanted her to be safe, it had been easier to let him have Bella, but this proved that he didn't really love her at all.

And _that_ was truly more than I could take. It was going to kill me.

I shouldn't have let my brothers pull me away from him. But Bella had been too close. And even after all of this, I couldn't take a chance that I'd hurt her.

I gave in to the wolf trying desperately to get out as soon as I was a safe distance away.

_Just wait, bro, you'll get your chance to kill him._

_ You'd regret it if you hurt the girl; save the fight for later._

My wolf-brothers voices filled my head with things I already knew; things that didn't change the way I felt.

I didn't _want_ to wait to kill him, at least not past however long it took me to get him away from Bella.

I should _not_ have come back for this. Trying to keep Bella happy was kicking the crap out of me.

_We're glad you're back, bro._

_ But sorry that she hurt you _again.

_Shut up!_ I thought back at them, not even caring who had said what.

I knew that I couldn't stay. As much as I wanted to be here when the pack was _finally_ able to kill Cullen without breaking the treaty, I knew that I couldn't wait around for it.

Worse than that, I knew that when the time came, Bella would die trying to protect her favorite leech. And even though she would already _be_ dead, I couldn't watch my brothers attack her. I couldn't _help_ them do it.

_You can't leave again, bro. You just got back._

_ What about Billy?_

_ We'll get him alone, so you won't have to hurt her._

_ You've only been back for a couple of days; you can't leave again yet._

I didn't want to hurt Billy, but I couldn't be much of a son to him like this anyway.

The decision made, I immediately took off. The faster I ran, the sooner I wouldn't be able to hear the pack in my head.

If I phased, I couldn't hear them, but then I wouldn't be able to live as a wolf; to try and block out everything human so I wouldn't feel the pain of Bella.

_Jacob._ That was Sam, and he was using his Alpha voice; the one that none of the rest of us could say no to.

Instantly, I was a man again, running through the woods naked, having ruined the only clothes I had with me at Bella's wedding. I changed my course, headed back to Billy's.

I knew that Sam was going to order me stay. He left me no choice but to leave as a human, and I hated him for it. He couldn't get in my head when I was human, which meant that he couldn't order me not to go.

When I was far enough away I could try phasing back.

I got to Billy's and ran inside quickly, hoping that my sister Rachel wouldn't be in the living room.

When Rachel'd come home from Washington State at the end of the summer semester – graduated early, the nerd – my biggest worry'd been that it would be hard keeping the secret around her. I wasn't used to covering things up in my own home. It made me real sympathetic to kids like Embry and Collin, whose parents didn't know they were werewolves. Embry's mom thought he was going through some kind of rebellious stage. He was permanently grounded for constantly sneaking out, but, of course, there wasn't much he could do about that. She'd check his room every night, and every night it would be empty again. She'd yell and he'd take it in silence, and then go through it all again the next day. We'd tried to talk Sam into giving Embry a break and letting his mom in on the gig, but Embry'd said he didn't mind. The secret was too important.

So I'd been all geared up to be keeping the that secret. And then, two days after Rachel got home, Paul ran into her on the beach. Bada bing, bada boom – true love! No secrets necessary when you found your other half, and all that imprinting werewolf garbage.

For once in my life, I caught a break, and no one was home.

I went straight to my room and threw on the first pants I found. Then I grabbed my backpack and turned it upside down over my bed, shaking out everything that I'd left in there since school had ended in June. I threw whatever clothes I could find inside; I didn't have a whole lot left that fit what with tearing through them when I phased on accident and growing to nearly seven feet tall in such a short time.

I debated putting a shirt and shoes on but decided not to risk them when I was still so upset. I only had one pair of shoes anyway; they went in the backpack. I grabbed a few things from the bathroom and threw them in on top.

In the kitchen, I scrawled a quick note to Billy.

_Dad,_

_ I thought I could be here, but I can't. I'm sorry._

_ Love, Jake_

He would understand. He wouldn't like it, but he'd understand.

I promised myself that since I was leaving as a human anyway, I'd find a way to stay in touch with him – probably not phone calls; that would give him a chance to tell me things I wouldn't want to hear. But I could try to write to him, just to let him know I was okay.

I threw a quick sandwich together for the road and ate it before I made it out the front door. Throwing my backpack over my shoulder, I headed out to the garage. I opened the drawer of my toolbox where I kept my wallet – and what little of my allowance I hadn't blown on fixing the Rabbit – and then debated where to put it.

If I phased, there was no way to keep it with me. The pants I had on would be ruined, leaving the wallet somewhere on the ground under the shreds. The backpack would rip off my shoulders but stay intact, but it was also more likely that if I left the backpack somewhere while I ran off the anger that it wouldn't be there when I got back.

That decided me on my next dilemma. I wanted to take the bike because it was faster, but it also reminded me of Bella and had nowhere for me to leave my stuff to keep it safe. I would have to take the Rabbit. I threw the wallet in the backpack and then threw the backpack in the back seat.

With one last sigh of regret, frustration and despair, I started the car and left the only home I'd ever known. I knew my brothers were in the woods, running with me, as I drove from La Push to Forks, where I would catch the 101. I didn't look at them; there was no point.

North or south? I didn't really care. I'd run north when I left last time, as a wolf. South as a man then.

I didn't pay attention to anything but the road as I drove. I didn't want to see all the familiar sights that would remind me of Bella and all that I was leaving behind. Driving as fast as I was, it didn't take long before I was out on the open road – still a road that was familiar, but away from all the reminders of Bella.

I chuckled at my own stupidity. I would never _really_ get away from things that reminded me of Bella.

I stopped for gas in Hoquiam and realized just how little money I had. I couldn't worry about it though. What choice did I have? If I got far enough away, I could phase and hunt for food, leaving all my money for gas. I cursed Sam again for forcing me to leave as a man. I bought a map to help figure out when I would be far away enough to phase safely.

Driving across the Astoria bridge and into Oregon brought a smile to my face; there was something satisfying about being in a different state than all the things that were haunting me.

Succumbing to my hunger, I turned off the 101 in Yachats, Oregon and onto the Yachats River Road, heading into Siuslaw National Forest. According to my map, I should be more than 300 miles from La Push, and according to our tests, I was _probably_ out of range of the minds of the pack.

I pulled over on the side of the road. It was late, and there weren't any other cars around. I stepped out of the car, locking it behind me, just in case, and tucking the key up under the wheel well. It was the best I could do.

I walked into the woods out of the view of the road and took off my pants. I took a deep breath before I phased. I couldn't just give in to my anger because if I heard the pack, I would need to phase back before Sam could give the order to go back home.

I phased and stayed still and quiet for a few minutes, waiting to see if I could hear anyone.

When I was pretty sure I was in the clear, I took off to hunt. I ate more than I needed to, both because I was enjoying myself and because I didn't know when I would eat next. I slept in the woods as a wolf; it was more comfortable than the Rabbit would have been. Also, the wolf stomach had no problem processing raw meat, but if I phased with such a full stomach, I might not be getting any sleep at all.

_Jake!_

_ Wake up, bro!_

The voices in my head weren't part of the dream I'd been having, but it took me a moment to realize that they were my brothers.

Without another thought, I phased back. I pulled the pants I'd strapped to my ankle on and walked back toward where I'd left my car. I pulled the keys out from the wheel well and unlocked the car, climbing in. I retreated up the road and back to the 101. I filled up again in the small town there.

Back on the highway, I wondered how the pack had been able to reach me this morning but unable to last night. Were they following me? That didn't make sense because they could easily run faster than I could drive.

Remembering the voices in my head, I became conscious of how different they'd sounded. Distant? When we'd tested at 300 miles, I couldn't remember the voices being distant. Maybe whatever mental antennas connected us had a strong signal for 300 miles and then it tapered off?

It didn't really matter. I had to get further away.

I crossed the line into California with so many different emotions I couldn't even name them all. I stopped in Crescent City to get gas. Without even enough money to fill up the tank, I put in just a few dollars – saving a little bit of cash for an emergency – and wondered what I should do. Knowing that I didn't look like a sixteen year old runaway was helpful. I could probably find a job somewhere here in town. I could live out of the Rabbit until I had more money, then I'd decide whether I needed to keep going or I could look for a place to stay.

I put on a clean shirt and my socks and shoes and went back into the gas station to ask the man behind the counter about a job. He looked me over and then handed me a form to fill out without saying anything.

I didn't know what I should do about all the info on the form that I didn't have: address, phone number, work experience. Maybe this was going to be harder than I thought.

"Sir?" I asked politely. "I'm really just passing through and don't have an address or phone yet." I slid the form back to him, still blank, and turned around to leave.

"Wait, kid," he said grudgingly.

I turned around. "Yeah?"

"I have a couple odd jobs I could let you do; you look like a strong kid. I'll pay you in cash, and we can skip the paperwork."

I smiled at him. "You won't regret it," I promised.

Frank, the gas station's owner, had me move the Rabbit around to the back of the store and start helping him out right away. He didn't ask any questions, and I was grateful. The busy work and heavy lifting kept my mind busy. Around dusk, another man showed up, Tom, the first night shift, I was told.

Frank gave me $100 for my half a day's work and told me that if I was back tomorrow morning that he'd have more for me to do. "And it's all right with me if your car stays around back all night," he added quietly, correctly assuming that I'd be sleeping in it.

I used my new cash to buy a couple of pre-stamped postcards, several frozen burritos – using the microwave in the back to heat them up – and a jug of water. I took everything out to the Rabbit and ate in silence. When I was done, I fished a pen out of the glove box and filled out a postcard to Billy.

_Dad,_

_ I'm safe. Please don't worry. I'll try to stay in touch._

_ Love, Jake_

I set it on the dashboard and held the other postcard in front of me. Why had I bought two? _Bella._ I pushed the idea out of my head. Bella did not deserve a postcard letting her know I was okay. I _wasn't_ okay, and it was Bella's fault. Where would I even send it?

Without my consent to, my hand scribbled a note to Bella at Charlie's address. If she was a leech now and couldn't see Charlie to get the postcard, that was her fault, not mine.

_Bella,_

_ Don't waste time worrying about me. I'm doing what you wanted. This is how I get on with my life without you._

_ Your Jacob_

I shouldn't send it; I hadn't even meant to write it. I hated that I could be almost 600 miles from her and still go out of my way to try to make her happy.

I wondered then where she actually would be by now. It'd been just a little over 24 hours since I'd seen her – since she'd been married. Where would Cullen take her to try and get some before he killed her?

My hands started shaking. I threw the pen back in the glove box and slammed it closed. Reaching into the backseat to grab the backpack, I pulled my wallet out. I stuffed what remained of my earnings into it and shoved it into my pocket.

Climbing out, I stuffed both postcards in my back pocket. I locked the Rabbit and put my keys in another pocket. I walked down the street, assuming I'd find a mailbox and unsure what else to do with myself. The neighborhood wasn't the nicest, but I didn't exactly have anything to be afraid of.

A bouncer sitting on a stool outside of a bar inclined his head once at me in greeting, obviously assuming I was headed into the bar. I nodded back at him as I approached and, on a whim, walked inside.

The bar was pretty crowded considering its poor location. I couldn't help but notice that there were only a few guys; most of the bar's customers were girls. _Women_, I mentally corrected myself.

It occurred to me then that if one of these women were my imprint, I wouldn't care about Bella anymore. I might be opening myself up for a whole new world of pain, but it could _not_ be worse than this.

I didn't want to blow all my money drinking while hoping to imprint on some random chick, but I'd look weird if I stood here just looking around the room much longer. I spotted an open seat a ways down the bar and went and sat. When the bartender came, I ordered a beer; I didn't really know what else to ask for, and I figured I could make a beer last a while and get a chance to check out everyone in here before I headed off.

I stared into the face of every girl who passed anywhere near me, making myself really look, noticing who was pretty and who had blue eyes and…who had way too much makeup on. I tried to find something interesting about each face, so that I would know for sure that I'd really tried. Things like: This one had a really straight nose; that one should pull her hair out of her eyes; this one could do lipstick ads if the rest of her face was as perfect as her mouth…

Sometimes they stared back. Sometimes they looked scared – like they were thinking, _Who is this big freak glaring at me?_ Sometimes I thought they looked kind of interested, but maybe that was just my ego running wild.

Either way, nothing. Even when I met the eyes of the girl who was – no contest – the hottest girl in the bar and probably in the city, and she stared right back with a speculation that _looked_ like interest, I felt nothing. Just the same desperate drive to find a way out of the pain.

As time went on, I started noticing all the wrong things. Bella things. This one's hair was the same color. That one's eyes were sort of shaped the same. This one's cheekbones cut across her face in just the same way. That one had the same little crease between her eyes – which made me wonder what she was worrying about…

When the bartender pointed to my empty glass and asked if I wanted another, I declined and gave up. What were the odds that my perfect match would be here, in a bar I couldn't name, at exactly the same time that I was?

As I made my way toward the door, I was stopped by a soft hand on my arm. I turned and met the eyes of the girl I'd decided was the hottest here. She had hair nearly the same color as Bella's, and her eyes were brown, though they weren't Bella brown. She was even about Bella's height and weight, and it made me wonder if my reasons for thinking her the prettiest here were the wrong kind of reasons.

"Are you really gonna leave without even saying 'Hi'?" she giggled.


	2. Chapter 2

I stammered for a minute and then spit out something brilliant. "I didn't know I was supposed to."

She seemed to think I was joking and burst into laughter. "All right then." She smiled. "I hope you're not afraid of an assertive woman."

I shook my head, not fully comprehending what was going on.

Her smile grew seductive. "Can I buy you a drink?"

"No," I replied without thinking.

She looked insulted – and a little shocked – and started to turn around.

"Shit," I mumbled. I added louder, "No! I meant that _I'll_ buy _you_ a drink." Not exactly what I should be doing with my short supply of cash, but what else could I do?

Her face shifted back into a smile. "I'm Melissa."

"Jake," I said and then followed her up to the bar.

"Cosmo," she told the bartender.

I considered ordering the same thing she had – whatever it was – but went with another beer instead.

The bartender gave us both our drinks a minute later, and I paid him, thankful that I'd stuck with the beer. A Cosmo was obviously a girl's drink.

She grabbed her drink with another smile at me, and I followed her with my beer to a less busy corner of the bar.

"So, do you come here often?" she asked, laughing again.

"I just got into town earlier today. This is my first time here," I told her honestly. There weren't going to be many more questions that I'd be able to answer with the truth.

"And what brings you to Crescent City?" She smiled at me again.

"Uh… the 101?" I joked.

She laughed at my joke, and I grew a little more confident.

"How about you?" I asked. "Do you come here often?"

"Yes, actually." She gave me another smile. "My girlfriends," she gestured to a group of girls who were looking at us, "and I, we like it here."

I glanced at her friends again. "Your friends are watching us." I wondered what they thought of their forward friend.

Melissa giggled, and it made me grin. _This _was the effect I'd always wished I had on Bella.

She blushed when she said, "They're waiting to see if we're going to leave together."

I realized two things simultaneously in that moment. One; Melissa was drunk, and her friends probably were too. Two; Melissa would – no, she _wanted to_ – sleep with me.

Why had I never tried to get Bella drunk?

"Are we?" I asked, trying to sound sexy. Did I want to?

She giggled and blushed again. She looked at me for a moment and then down at her drink.

Her eyes came back up to mine. "Yes," she whispered. She picked up her drink and drained what was left.

I did the same with mine.

Standing up, she reached out for my hand.

I took it and stood up. Melissa faced her friends one more time to give them a smile and a wave.

I waved at them too, and they all erupted in giggles.

She led me by the hand out of the bar.

When we were on the street, she stopped and turned to face me. Her free hand came up and pressed my cheek. Slowly, she slid it backwards 'til it was around my neck. She pulled, and I let my head fall slowly toward her. Melissa stood up on her tip toes to meet me. Our lips pressed together gently.

I felt like I was cheating on Bella. I _hated_ Bella then, for only a moment. Would I ever be able to move on?

I turned my anger into passion and kissed the girl in front of me – this girl who wanted _me_. Her mouth was already open, her tongue searching for mine while I'd been stuck on Bella, as always. I copied her movements, my mouth and tongue repeating back to her the things her mouth and tongue had just done.

I'd never kissed anyone like this before. Bella and I had come close once, but that hadn't been like this. Her hands were both in the hair at the back of my neck now, pulling me closer to her. My own hands had somehow found their way to her hips, where they were fondling the edge of her shirt and trying to get more of the bare skin underneath.

She pulled back a little to smile at me again. "I feel dizzy," she sighed. "I don't think I should drive, but my car's here."

"I'll drive your car," I heard myself say.

Melissa pressed her lips to mine for another moment. When she pulled back, she held up her keys. I took them from her with a smile.

"I parked over here." She took my hand again and led me in the direction she'd pointed.

As we approached, she pointed to a newer VW Beetle, and I had to smile again. I pressed the button on her keys to unlock the doors and went to open her door for her. I walked around to the driver's side while I contemplated exactly what I was doing.

I climbed in and had to move the seat back. "Sorry," I muttered, hoping she didn't mind that I'd adjusted her seat.

She laughed quietly and said, "Don't worry about it. Comes with the territory I guess, when you pick the tallest guy in the bar to take home."

I chuckled and started the car. "Which way?"

Neither of us seemed to have much to say as I drove us to Melissa's, following her directions. I wondered if she felt as uncomfortable as I did. After parking where she told me to, we got out. I pushed the button on the keys to lock the car and then handed her keys back to her.

She took my hand again, and I followed her up a flight of stairs to her apartment. I was beginning to feel incredibly awkward, so I reminded my body of why I was here, hoping it would take over for me as it had when Melissa had kissed me last time; I leaned in as she unlocked her front door and kissed her ear.

She moaned and spun around to face me, quickly pressing her lips to mine again. She fumbled behind her for the doorknob, not breaking the kiss. I leaned in past her and opened it for her.

Her arms came around my neck. I put my hands around behind her and picked her up. Her legs flew around my waist. I gently kicked the door further open and walked through, carrying Melissa. I broke the kiss, trying to look around the apartment and figure out where I should go.

"Straight down the hall," she panted, moving her mouth to my neck, kissing and suckling every inch she could reach. I kicked the front door closed behind us and carried her down the hall quickly while she attacked my neck. I found her room and carried her in. I walked to the edge of her bed before lightly tossing her down on it.

Melissa lay there, gazing up at me, waiting for me to join her on the bed… and I knew I couldn't do it.

Tired of waiting for me to come to her, she got on her knees on the bed and stretched up to kiss my neck again. I pushed her back gently as I stepped away so that she wouldn't fall forward in my absence.

"I'm sorry," I whispered.

"What is it, Jake?" she asked, her voice still breathy.

"I can't do this." I shook my head.

She flopped back onto the bed with a huge sigh. "Fuck," she complained.

"I'm really sorry, Melissa." I didn't know how to explain to her that doing this would feel too much like cheating on the girl I was in love with who was probably _right this minute_ having sex on her honeymoon… and that my love's heart would probably not be beating any longer by morning, one way or another. "There's a girl…" I started.

"Shit."

I went to sit next to her on the bed. "She's not _my_ girl." I couldn't figure out how to make her understand.

"Then what does she have to do with this?" Melissa sounded frustrated.

"If I… If we…" Why couldn't I get this out? "I'd only be using you to try and hurt her."

"Ah." She sat up again and wrapped her arms around me. "Then we'll be even."

I stared blankly at her. Did she mean she was only trying to hurt someone else too?

"I plan on using you too." She kissed my ear. "For mind-blowing sex."

Tempting. I couldn't have made it clearer to her that I had absolutely no feelings for her, and she wanted to sleep with me anyway. I tried to turn around to talk to her, but the minute I was facing her, she smashed her lips to mine.

I gave in; my body took over. Everything was mouths and tongues and hands and bare skin and kisses. Melissa pulled away from me and reached into her nightstand to pull out a condom.

With our bodies apart, my mind took over again. I jumped off the bed and began scrambling to get my clothes back on. Distantly, I noticed that I was mumbling something, and I hoped it wasn't anything I shouldn't be – like vampire, werewolf, or _virgin_.

Melissa sighed in frustration. "This really isn't gonna happen?"

I shook my head. "Not tonight."

Still wearing only her panties, she walked down the hall toward the front door. I finished putting my shoes on and followed her.

"I really am sorry, Melissa," I said as I walked down the hall. "Obviously I _want_ to, but I don't think I'll be able to live with myself later."

She smiled at me and held out a small piece of paper.

"What's this?" I asked.

"My number. Clearly this girl is still too… in your head. When she isn't anymore, call me. We can pick up where we left off." She stood on her tip-toes and tried to kiss me.

I bent down hesitantly, and she gave me a brief kiss before stepping away.

"We would've had an _amazing_ time, Jake." She was already walking away from me, down the hall. "I hope you'll call!" she yelled from the bedroom.

"If I can… _When_ I can, I will," I told her, though I doubted I ever would. I left her apartment and began walking back in the direction of my car at the gas station.

Part of me wished I'd stayed with her. Sure, I knew I would regret it later. A lot. But what else could effectively distract me tonight; the first night of Bella's honeymoon.

I had no idea what time it was, and I didn't really care. It only mattered because the sooner the sun rose, the sooner I could go back to doing mindless work at the gas station for Frank. I passed a mailbox and reached into my back pocket, worried for a moment that the postcards would be gone. They were still there, and to ease my mind before I got further away from Melissa's, I checked my wallet and keys too.

I stood in front of the mailbox for a long time holding the postcard addressed to Bella. Bella _Swan_ I had stubbornly put above Charlie's address. Eventually, I dropped both postcards in the mailbox and immediately wished I hadn't. I stood there like an idiot, contemplating trying to get them back – well, just the one back, really.

Then a breeze hit me. I smelled the very thing I hated the most: vampire.

I charged in the direction it had come from, trying to take off my shoes and socks as I ran. I didn't really think through that I was nowhere near the land or people I was called to protect, or that we were on city streets and there might be witnesses, or that I had no idea who this vampire might be or if they were a friend of the Cullens, or that I might be outnumbered, or any of the other 2,000 things I should've considered.

I just wanted to kill it.

When my shoes were off, I pulled my wallet and keys out of my pockets and stuffed them into the toes. I took off my shirt and wrapped it around the rest. I slowed down, knowing I was close. I would have to phase now or never. I looked up and down the dark street and saw no one.

I set my pile of clothes down behind a newspaper stand, quickly adding my pants to the pile. It felt divine to let the wolf out. I listened in my head for the rest of the pack as I closed the distance to the alley corner, where I knew I would find the bloodsucker.

I heard signs of a struggle and ran faster, afraid I had delayed too long and some innocent would pay the price. I whipped around the corner and took in the scene in front of me quickly.

A girl was backed into a corner, a can of mace in her hand, held out and up toward her attacker's face. She looked scared but also confused. I'd bet that she was wondering why the spray had no effect on the leech's eyes. _Their eyes are stone, just like the rest of them_, I thought to her, though I knew she wouldn't hear me. Facing her, with his back to me, was a vampire whose scent I didn't recognize. He was moving causally closer to her, thinking he had all the time in the world.

The parasite, clearly enjoying playing with his food, didn't hear me approach. He turned, though, when the girl saw me and shrieked anew.

"Wha-" was all he got out before I was on him.

The girl took off, and I was grateful; she would have nightmares enough without seeing this. The leech was barely able to defend himself, having no idea what I was and having been taken by complete surprise. I'd removed several of his limbs before deciding to end it. I beheaded him with my teeth, wishing that Cullen were in my jaw instead.

_That was _satisfying, I thought.

I had to come up with a plan to make sure the bloodsucker would stay dead – I'd have to burn the pieces to be sure – and figure out what I would do with the ashes. I didn't have time to waste, worried the girl would run home and call the police. Not that they would believe what she saw, but they would probably come to investigate nonetheless.

The alley I was on was visible from the street, so I ducked around another corner to think. I spotted a dumpster in this alley, and the plan came together. I brought the pieces around the corner and tossed them inside. I trotted back to where I'd left my clothes – having seen that the street was still empty – and phased and re-dressed as quickly as I could.

I looked up and down the streets, trying to find somewhere I could get matches or a lighter. There was an all-night liquor store across the street and a few buildings over, so I bought matches and a box of cigarettes; I'd never smoke them, but I didn't want to make the cashier curious.

I went back to the alley with the corpse's corpse and lit the contents of the dumpster on fire. I didn't stay to watch it burn, though I'd have liked to; the fire would have the authorities headed this way shortly. I knew that leeches were quite flammable, and I hoped that it would burn fast enough that they wouldn't know a body had been in the fire.

I routed myself toward Frank's again with a slightly lighter load on my back. One girl was safe because of me. There was one less bloodsucker in the world. Bella flashed into my thoughts, and I amended my victory; we broke even on leeches tonight. Still, a victory I hadn't expected.

I replayed the fight in my head, putting Cullen's face over the other bloodsucker's. It was a beautiful thought, and for a split-second, I wished he were here to hear it.

When I got back to Frank's, I didn't know what else to do with myself. I went in and bought a bunch of doughnuts and some milk and took them back out to the Rabbit. If Tom had still been working, I probably would have chatted with him for a while, but the new guy wouldn't know who I was and would probably call the cops if I tried to hang out.

I ate and then sat in the Rabbit, wishing I could fall asleep. Instead, I replayed the night's fight over in my head again, but this time, I put Bella in the corner, terrified of Cullen; _that_ was how she _should_ have felt about him.

Eventually, I drifted to sleep, saving Bella from Cullen over and over again in my mind.

I woke up with the sun in the morning. Sleeping in your car will do that to you. I went in to Frank's to get some breakfast and to wash up – as much as possible in a public restroom – and change clothes.

Frank got there while I was finishing eating breakfast in my car, and I was glad I could start working right away. The day passed quickly, and I wasn't excited when it ended.

"I've got more you can do tomorrow, but I think that'll be about it without the paperwork." Frank paid me $200 for the day and casually told me the cheapest place to get a room.

I thanked him and drove to the motel he'd mentioned; I needed a shower. After checking in, I brought my backpack inside. I stuffed most of my cash into an extra sock and put it in the bottom of the backpack, leaving only about $50 in my wallet. I wasn't afraid of being mugged but was half-hoping I'd find another reason to phase soon.

I felt better after the shower, but I was dreading the long hours until work again in the morning. Having nothing to do but think about Bella all night wasn't a good idea. I watched the local news for a while, wondering if I would see anything about the dead leech; I didn't. Bored, I left the room, walking again, not sure what I was hoping to find. My imprint? Another bloodsucker who needed killing?

It was getting late when I saw another crowded bar ahead. I promised myself that I would not get in a situation anything like the night before and went in. I sat at the bar, nursing a beer and trying to be more subtle about checking out every girl in the room. Whenever I got any return gazes that looked like interest, I quickly turned my attention elsewhere.

I walked back to the motel late that night, disappointed that I hadn't found an imprint _or_ a parasite to play with; nothing but Bella tonight, and I knew I would have a hard time sleeping. I lay in the bed, wondering if I had imprinted on Melissa if I would have slept with her last night. If I imprinted on a girl like Melissa, would I really wind up better off than I was now? Melissa hadn't exactly been searching for her soul mate.

With Melissa and what had nearly happened the night before in my head, I drifted to sleep. In my dreams that night, Bella rewarded me when I saved her from the bloodsucker.

I slept later the next morning, so I rushed to Frank's gas station, hoping he wouldn't be upset. There wasn't as much to do, so I was done early, but Frank gave me another $200.

I tried to give half of it back to him. "Frank, you've already given me more than I deserve."

"Kid, when I was young, I ran from life for a while too. Somebody helped me out like I done for you. I hope when you're an old man, you'll do the same when somebody comes along who needs help and no questions." He clapped his hand on my shoulder. "I'd be happy to have you stay on if you want to put the motel address and phone number on the form, but I can't sneak anything more past the IRS."

I thought about it.

"I didn't think you'd want to. Moving on is easier," he added. He was probably right.

"Thanks a lot, Frank. If I can help a kid out someday, I'll think of you when I do it."

He smiled. "It gets better, Jake. It gets better."

I hoped he was right. With work done for the day and the decision to keep going made, I hurried back to the motel. I still had about an hour to check out before I'd have to pay for another night.

I took a shower and put all my stuff back in my backpack. I would have to figure out laundry soon; I was nearly out of clean clothes already. I filled up the car at Frank's station with a wave to Tom before I left Crescent City behind me.

As soon as I was on 101 south again, I was glad that I had decided not to stay. Frank had been right; it was easier to move on. I was about 150 miles south of Crescent City before I couldn't resist the pull of the trees flying by windows any longer. I pulled over and undressed, leaving only my pants on.

I climbed out and walked into the woods before stopping to remove my pants and tie them to my leg. I phased and then paused to listen for my brothers. Having forgotten that I couldn't hear them, the silence was deafening.

I knew that if I could hear them, they'd only be thinking things I didn't want to hear. They'd want me to come home. They'd tell me what they knew about Bella – if they knew anything yet.

I didn't want to hear from them – I knew I wouldn't be able to stand it – but I was lonely. How long could I go on like this? I was used to being surrounded by friends and family. I'd only been alone for a few days, and it was already draining me. I pushed thoughts like that – _all_ human thoughts – out of my mind and gave in to my wolf instincts.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Another one for yay4shanghai!**

**Previously…**

**I phased and then paused to listen for my brothers. Having forgotten that I couldn't hear them, the silence was deafening.**

**I knew that if I could hear them they would only be thinking things I didn't want to hear. They would want me to come home. They would tell me what they knew about Bella – if they knew anything yet.**

**I didn't want to hear from them – I knew I wouldn't be able to stand it – but I was lonely.**

**How long could I go on like this? I was used to being surrounded by friends and family. I'd only been alone for a few days and it was already draining me.**

**I pushed thoughts like that – **_**all**_** human thoughts – out of my mind and gave in to my wolf instincts.**

More than two full days went by before I started to worry about human things again – like my car still on the side of the road. I thought about just leaving it, letting it be towed, and staying as the wolf. Being a wolf was so much easier than being a human. But now that I had thought about it, I couldn't stop worrying about my Rabbit; I loved that car.

That was when an image of my sister Rachel, nearly naked, popped into my head.

I had gone insane. It was _disgusting _but I couldn't get it out of my head.

_Come on, Paul!_

_Do you think Rachel really wants us all to see that?_

How had the pack reached me now?! I was 750 miles away!

_JAKE?!_

As I quickly phased to human again I thought about how they had been just as surprised as I was to be in each other's heads again.

Tramping through the woods I tried to figure the mind contact thing out.

I came up with a theory, the only thing that made any sense.

The further away I was, the longer I needed to be a wolf before our minds could connect again. If I had tried to run as the wolf, they probably never would have left my head. Was there no distance too far for our minds to connect?

I finally found the Rabbit, still where I'd left it but with the new addition of two tickets tucked under the windshield wiper.

I grabbed the tickets, pulled the key from the wheel well and climbed in.

With no reason to wait, I started the car and headed south again.

I stopped for gas in the next town. I also bought food, water, and two more postcards. I ate in my car in the parking lot and then pulled the pen back out to fill out the postcards.

_Dad,_

_I'm still safe. Sorry about the tickets. I'll pay you back when I can. Keep a better eye on Rachel and Paul._

_Love, Jake_

I let myself enjoy a smirk thinking about the trouble Paul would be in when Billy got my postcard.

I resigned myself to the fact that I was going to be unable to stop myself from sending the second postcard to Bella again and put some thought into what to write.

_Bella,_

_I'm still trying. That's all I can do. Maybe this won't kill me after all._

_Your Jacob_

I pulled out of the lot, dropping both postcards into a drive-up mailbox on the way out of town.

I focused on the road as I drove – not what towns I was driving through, not how fast I was going, not the other cars around me, just the black pavement under the car.

I came out of my reverie and glanced at the clock and saw that I had been on the road for nearly four hours. I looked ahead and saw that I was nearly in San Francisco.

A world famous city, I knew I would have to stay here, if only for a few days.

I stayed on the 101 and marveled that it turned into a regular road once inside the city limits – just as it did in Forks.

I spotted a motel and parked. The rooms were more expensive than they'd been in Crescent City but I would need an address if I wanted to find work here. There was no way I had the kind of luck that would help me find another Frank.

I brought my backpack into my new room and immediately took a shower.

As I donned my last clean clothes I put everything dirty back into the backpack and set out to figure out laundry.

I went back into the office and asked the guy who'd given me my room. There was a laundry mat just a block down and around the corner.

I left my car in the motel's small parking lot and walked to the laundry mat.

I passed a small club that wasn't open for the night yet on the way there and thought about coming back to it later that night. Maybe my imprint was a San Francisco girl.

I did my laundry, bored with too much to think about while I waited. For good measure, I took a good look at everyone – every female – who came in and those who walked by outside. Surely whoever and wherever my imprint was she had laundry to do.

I walked home, looking again at the club I'd noticed earlier. This time a small sign in the window caught my eye.

_Bouncer Wanted_

I laughed out loud. Bouncer. That was a job I could excel at. I peeked in the window and saw a bartender setting things up for the night.

I knocked on the window.

"Closed!" he called without looking up.

I knocked again. He looked up at me this time and I gestured to the sign.

He put down the bottles in his hand and walked to the door.

As he unlocked it, he opened it just slightly and asked, "You want the job?"

"Yea," I replied.

He looked me over. "You certainly look like you could handle it. Any experience?"

I chuckled. "Not professionally. But I've never been in a fight I lost."

He smiled. "Come on in. I'll call Daisy, the owner. She'll want to come down and meet you. Can you hang out for a bit?" He opened the door wider to let me in.

"Sure, sure." I stepped inside and followed him up to the bar.

He picked up a phone from behind the counter and dialed a number.

"Hello?" I could easily hear the woman on the other end of the phone.

"Hey, Daisy. It's Shawn. There's a guy here about the bouncer job."

"Does he look like he could handle it?" she asked.

"Would I call you if he didn't?"

She chuckled. "Alright, Shawn. Tell him I'm on my way."

He hung up the phone and turned to face me. "She's on the way. She lives close. Can I get you something to drink?"

"A coke would be great," I answered.

We chatted about inconsequential things: the weather, the kind of crowd the club usually got, how long he'd worked for Daisy, etc.

About 15 minutes after Shawn had called her, Daisy walked in. Tall, blonde, blue-eyed and absolutely nothing like Bella.

I sighed inwardly, wondering why I couldn't do _anything_ without Bella on my mind.

I stood up and strode to her, trying to look tough, professional, and serious – like a bouncer.

"I'm Jake," I said firmly.

"Daisy," she smiled and took the hand I had extended. "Well, you certainly _look_ like a bouncer."

Daisy dropped my hand, finished shaking it, and moved her hand to my bicep, giving it a small squeeze.

I flexed the muscle for her, assuming this was a normal part of an interview for a bouncer, and watched her eyes widen, staring at my body, and her lips spread into a grin.

"You're hired," she sighed.

I beamed. "Cool."

Daisy slid her hand down my arm until, with a sigh, she took her hand away. Was she hitting on me and hiring me at the same time?

"There's some paperwork you'll have to fill out in my office." She took a few steps away and then looked over her shoulder at me. She held one finger up and curled it a few times, indicating I should follow her. "When can you start?"

"Whenever you need me to." I followed behind her.

"Tonight?" She sounded hopeful.

"Sure."

She turned around to flash me a huge smile.

We got into her small office and sat down. She pulled a few slips of paper from a drawer and passed them to me, along with a pen.

"Can I see your ID?"

I pulled my wallet out, afraid I was about to lose my new job, and handed it over.

She started copying information onto another piece of paper and then froze.

"You're _16_?!"

I felt the blood rush into my cheeks and could only nod.

She pursed her lips together and tapped one finger on them.

I kept filling out the forms she'd given me; I'd already started so there wasn't much point in not finishing while I waited for her to think.

"Alright, Jacob Black," she said finally. "Here's what we'll do. You can work tonight. Tomorrow, I'll find out if it's legal to keep you on. If not, I'll pay you under the table for tonight. If I can keep you, I will." Her smile spread across her face again as she finished speaking.

"Sounds good to me." I finished the papers and passed them back to her.

We talked for several more minutes and she filled me in on the few duties that the job entailed. The club – The Future - was 18 and up so it was my job to card everyone and put wristbands on those who were allowed to drink. Obviously, I had to break up/prevent any fights. And I had to collect the cover charge – on the weeknights only – from everyone.

When we were finished I had an hour before I started working so I took my clean clothes back to the motel and got some food.

The job was easy and I fell into the routine of it quickly. It was nice that I was _supposed_ to look into the face of every girl, just in case.

I'd been working for several hours and stood up to stretch before going in to get a soda from Shawn. I came back out and there was a girl waiting to get in – the only girl who'd stood out from the others all night. Okay, so she probably would stand out anywhere – with neon orange hair and a skimpy, strappy shirt-thing and baggy guy's pants – but I still noticed her, and that was something new.

And she noticed me.

"You're new," she smiled after I set my drink down on the little table next to my stool.

"First night," I confirmed.

"I know," she replied casually.

I gave her a quizzical look.

"I come here a lot," she explained. "Shawn's a good friend." She gestured toward him inside.

"I'm Jake," I told her.

"Pete." She held out her hand for me to shake.

"Pete the girl?" I asked stupidly.

She rolled her eyes and nodded. "Heard 'em all before. My name is Pete and I have a uterus."

I laughed which made her smile.

"You drinking tonight, Pete?" I asked, doing my job – she didn't look 21.

She nodded but said, "I don't need a wristband."

"And now it's clear why you come here a lot," I smiled, motioning her past me and into the club.

Her smile was large and genuine.

"Welcome to The Future," she said, stealing my line.

I opened my mouth to complain but lost what I was going to say when she threw her arms around me in a quick hug.

I was too shocked to say anything or react before she'd dropped her arms and was off, dancing her way through the club up to the bar.

Shawn came to greet her as soon as he finished with the customer he'd already been helping. He looked happy to see her and I wondered if they were dating. She'd called him a friend but I'd bet they were more.

Pete the girl had thrown me off my game and I didn't realize that I was neglecting my job until a giggling group of girls were calling, trying to get my attention.

"Sorry," I said as I turned around.

I threw myself back into my work, pushing Pete out of my head and several more hours passed before she forced her way back in to the forefront of my brain.

"Jake!" Pete yelled excitedly as she came out the door.

She sat down on my lap – or tried, at least; the stool was fairly high up and Pete was obviously drunk.

I couldn't stifle the laugh that boiled over as she fell off of me. I also couldn't help using my fast reflexes to catch her and stop her from hitting the ground. I helped her get her feet under her before I let go.

"Oops," she laughed at herself. "Maybe I had one too many."

"One?" I chuckled.

"Shut up!" She tried to shove against my shoulder and I forgot to let her move me.

I laughed again, trying to cover the mistake. I wasn't really used to being around people that didn't know what I was.

"Well, Jake the bouncer, I guess I'll see you tomorrow." She held one fist up for a pound.

"I actually might not get to keep the job, Pete the girl." I tapped my fist against hers.

"Why not?" Her face turned into a frown.

I leaned down and cupped one hand around her ear and whispered, "I'm only 16." I straightened to wait for her reaction.

Her face lit up in another huge smile. "Me too."

I had a million questions – Where are your parents? What are you doing at a club in San Francisco? Isn't it a school night? – and I couldn't ask her any of them without opening myself up to the same ones.

Instead I said, "Shit. I wasn't supposed to let you in."

She laughed and patted my knee. "I'm sure I'm the only mistake you made tonight, Jake. And if you'd have stopped me, you'd have been the first to do it."

That knowledge _did_ help a little. "Thanks, Pete."

"I hope you're back tomorrow!" she called as she started to walk down the street.

"You gonna get home okay?" I yelled.

"Always do!" she yelled back without turning around.

I worried about her a little but it didn't really seem like it was my place to stop her.

The rest of the night passed without incident until I was alone in the club straightening up with Shawn.

"Don't you worry about your girlfriend getting home okay?" I asked out of nowhere. I blamed it on my werewolf instinct to protect.

"Girlfriend?" Shawn asked.

"Pete?"

He laughed. "Not my girlfriend. And you're gonna owe me one if you don't want me to tell her you said that."

"Alright," I agreed. "But don't you worry about her getting home okay?" I pressed.

"Can't." He shook his head. "If you wanna be friends with that girl you'd better accept right now that there is no changing her, babying her, or worrying about her allowed."

I laughed. "But giving her alcohol when she's underage is fine?" I kept my voice light so he wouldn't think I was trying to challenge him on it.

"_I_ didn't let her in the club!" he challenged.

"She didn't have a wristband on," I countered.

"True. So maybe there's one other thing you need to know about Pete."

I waited.

He smiled at me. "That girl _always_ gets what she wants."

We finished cleaning and locked up for the night.

I was happy with myself as I walked home, thinking about someone other than Bella. Okay, _worrying_ about someone other than Bella. And, of course, now that I'd thought of Bella, I couldn't really make her go away.

I slept late the next day, woken by the phone in the room ringing.

"Hello?" I asked groggily.

"Hey, Jake. It's Daisy." She sounded happy so I hoped that meant good news.

"Morning, Daisy."

She laughed. "3:00 pm isn't generally considered 'morning,' Jake."

I glanced at the clock and confirmed that she was right about the time. "Guess I'm not used to the schedule yet."

"You'd better _get_ used to it," she said, clearly implying that I could keep the job.

"Oh, yea?" I asked, to be sure.

"Yes. I just have to make sure you are kept away from the alcohol."

"That's great. Thanks a lot, Daisy."

"Can you work again tonight?" she asked.

"Whenever you need me, I'm yours," I told her.

She giggled into the phone. "I plan on taking you up on that, Jacob Black," she flirted.

Crap. How do I get out of this without losing my new job? I went with something that had never let me down before; "Sure, sure."

She giggled again before we said our goodbyes.

Knowing I had a job – and a steady paycheck coming – made me want to better my current situation further. I went to the motel lobby and paid for a newspaper – and some junk food from the vending machine. I wanted an apartment – or at least a room in one. Something cheap, close to work, with a kitchen, and more permanent than a motel.

There were three listings that looked promising so I called them. One had no answer so I left a message. The next said I could stop by anytime today. The third had me set up an appointment for 6:00 that evening.

The junk food I'd eaten hadn't really done much for my hunger so I went out in search of food, planning on stopping by the second apartment I had called about.

After eating, I headed for the apartment. I double-checked the address in the paper as I got close.

_Pete's Auto Body_

I smiled thinking about a girl named Pete and checked the address again. This was it. I let my gaze wander up and saw that there were apartments above the shop. Being in such a big city took some getting used to. Apparently, when they run out of space, everything starts going up.

I wandered into the shop, not sure if it was where I should go or not.

"Can I help you?" a man in mechanics' coveralls asked as he walked toward me.

I pointed up. "I called about an apartment."

"Ah! Let me get the keys." He wiped his hands on a rag on the counter before fishing around in a drawer.

"I'm Jake." I held out my hand to shake his as he walked back with the keys.

"Nice to meet you, Jake. I'm Stacey."

Slightly confused I said, "You're not Pete?"

He laughed. "No. I couldn't give the shop my name. People assume Stacey is a girl nowadays and that's not good for business. Pete sounds like a mechanic," he explained.

"Pete _is_ a mechanic."

I turned around, recognizing the voice of Pete the girl. She was walking about of a back office, wearing oversized greasy coveralls that made her look tiny.

"Jake?" she asked, surprised.

"Hey, Pete," I replied, equally shocked.

"You two know each other?" Stacey asked.

We both nodded.

He tossed the keys he held at Pete and walked back into the garage, calling over his shoulder, "Then you show him the empty apartment."

Pete caught the keys and walked closer to me. "What are you doing here?"

I chuckled and pointed to the keys in her hand. "Looking at an apartment I hope."

She smiled and tossed the keys in the air. Catching them again, she said, "Then let's go."

I followed her out of the shop and around the corner to a gate. She tapped in a code and opened the gate when the buzzer sounded.

She held the gate open behind her and stepped into the small opening, unlocking the door in front of her with the keys in her hand.

As she stepped through the door, I stepped inside the gate and let it close behind me. She held the door open for me as I closed the distance.

Inside the small lobby were two doors, a flight of stairs, and, along one wall, a bunch of small silver mailboxes.

Pete headed up the stairs. "It's on the top floor which is good assuming you don't have much to move cause you won't have any neighbors stomping around when you're trying to sleep."

I nodded and then added, "Cool," when I realized she couldn't hear my head nod.

We went up the stairs to the fourth story.

There were two doors off of the landing. Pete stepped up to the one on the left and unlocked the door.

Inside was a short hall, with a bathroom tucked behind a door on the left. Further down it opened up to a decent sized room with a queen-sized bed in a corner behind a dressing screen, a small couch, a couple chairs with end tables next them, and a TV on a table. A closet door was along the right side wall with a small dresser standing next to it. There was a doorway – not an actual door - to a kitchen on the left that had a tiny kitchen table with two chairs.

Pete let me look around for a few minutes in silence. Finally she spoke, "Look, Stacey's cool, but… it would be better for us both if you don't _talk_ to him."

"If I rent this apartment, I'm gonna have to talk to him." I pretended not to notice that she was implying I would narc on her.

"You know what I mean," she said, annoyed.

I shook my head at her. "Only a narc would know what you meant."

"So you _are_ a narc?" she teased.

"_Or_ the little brother of a narc," I explained.

She laughed and it brought a smile to my face.

"So are you gonna move in with me, stalker?"

"How could I have known that you lived here?" I asked, incredulous.

"Shawn told me you were _worried_ about me." She sounded disgusted.

"Not me," I lied.

She looked disbelieving. "Yea, well, I wouldn't put it past him to tell you where I lived to help you stalk me. He'd consider it payback."

"You've helped one of his stalker's out before?" I smiled.

She laughed again and shook her head. "I would though."

I walked back down the hall to check out the bathroom. "You think Stacey would rent to me?" I asked, worried again about my age getting in the way.

I hadn't heard her follow me and was surprised when her voice came from right behind me. "If I told him you were cool."

"Am I?" I asked, turning around to face her.

She shrugged. "So far, so good, I guess. Does that mean you want the place?"

"There're two other places I want to look at." Though nothing short of my imprint could make me choose another apartment over this one.

"Who else are you stalking?" she teased.

"Which one is yours?" I asked, ignoring her joke.

"4B."

"I guess that'll be good having the landlord just across the hall."

"_Stacey_ doesn't live there. I do."

"Oh." Sticking with my policy of not asking her questions that I wouldn't be able to answer either, I had to let a whole new line of them go – Stacey's not your dad? Who is he then? What would he think if he knew I met you at a club?

"You wanna look around anymore?" Pete stepped out of the bathroom doorway.

"Nah, thanks. I like it. I'll check out the other places and call Stacey."

She moved toward the exit. I followed.

"That apartment has been open for a while. I hope you take it." She added, "For Stacey, I mean. He could use the rent."

We headed down the stairs.

"If you're getting an apartment, does that mean you got the job?" She turned around to smile at me in the lobby, apparently having just made the connection.

I nodded. "_I'm _just not allowed near the alcohol."

She laughed. "You can pass for old enough to get a drink wherever you want. Leave The Future to me."

I chuckled. "Tell Stacey I'll give him a call," I said turning away.

"I'll tell him he's got a renter," she replied under her breath.

I wanted to argue but a human wouldn't have been able to hear her.

When I got back to the motel room the little light on the phone was flashing, indicating a message. I tapped the button to make it play. The first apartment I had called about had already been rented.

To kill time I went shopping for some of the basics I would need in my new apartment: soap, shampoo, a couple of towels, etc. I knew there would be more to buy later but I bought things I would need to get through the first day. I also picked up a better map of the area – the map I had bought before showed San Francisco but without any close-ups. I would need to find somewhere I could let the wolf run soon. The longer I went without phasing, the more likely it became that he would come out when I got upset.

6:00 was fast approaching so after dropping the stuff back in the motel room, I headed to the other apartment. It was nicer, cheaper, and closer to work. I told the landlord there that I'd seen something I liked better.

I went back to the motel room and called Stacey, as promised.

"Hello?" It was Pete who answered the phone.

"Hey, Pete. It's Jake."

"You want the apartment." It wasn't a question.

"When can I move in?"

"Stacey'll want to have it cleaned. Probably tomorrow."

"Perfect. Later, then!"

**A/N: Let me know if you want more!**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: This chapter is where it starts getting better, imo. This is about halfway through part 1 and by the end Jake'll be over Bella and then the story takes on a pretty different feel. Anyway, if you're still reading, thanks! And please review, even telling me what you don't like would be great!**

**Previously…**

**I went back to the motel room and called Stacey, as promised.**

"**Hello?" It was Pete who answered the phone.**

"**Hey, Pete. It's Jake."**

"**You want the apartment." It wasn't a question.**

"**When can I move in?"**

"**Stacey'll want to have it cleaned. Probably tomorrow."**

"**Perfect. Later, then!"**

I got dinner on my way to work, wondering if Pete would come back tonight. My wondering sent my mind on a new tangent, realizing that this girl was starting to take up as much time in my thoughts as Bella did. That couldn't be healthy. I didn't even know her. Was I on some kind of weird rebound?

And she wasn't my imprint… not that I really believed I'd find an imprint – the legends said it was rare and already four of the guys had done it. But I think finding my imprint had been my subconscious goal when I set out south on 101.

I was really beginning to like my job - going through the motions, staying busy, checking for imprints, hoping to see Pete – when my boss showed up.

She made me nervous. But not because I was afraid of the quality of my work. I was pretty certain she was flirting with me.

So there I was, in the middle of trying to be polite and friendly with my boss without leading her on when Pete finally showed up.

"Jake! Daisy!" She was beaming as she jogged the last few steps to us.

"Hi, Pete," Daisy smiled. I wondered if she knew that Pete was underage and what I should do about letting her in.

Pete smiled at Daisy but stepped past her to get to me. She climbed up into my lap, wrapping her arms around my neck.

I was too shocked to react.

"Just push me off if you don't want my help keeping your new boss out of your pants," she whispered in my ear.

When I didn't respond she ran her tongue along the edge of my ear and then began planting kisses on my neck.

"Pete, I'm glad you and Jake get along so well but you should leave him alone while he's working." Daisy's voice was still light but I could hear the jealousy in it.

Pete pressed her lips to mine once, briefly, and then climbed down.

"So should you," she hissed, under her breath but loud enough for Daisy to hear.

She walked inside before either Daisy or I could react.

"Sorry," I muttered.

"I'm sure there's paperwork I should be doing." Daisy started to step away and then looked at me again. Her face was unreadable.

After a moment she smiled and then walked inside. "It's for the best; he's only 16," she said to herself in a voice only a werewolf would hear.

I was grateful that it seemed like Daisy was giving up on me now but I worried that owing Pete a favor wasn't going to prove to be a good thing.

When Pete left that night I found it a little easier not to worry about her. I knew how close she lived – and I knew that if she screamed between the club and home, I would hear her.

I wanted to thank her for her help with Daisy but I thought it best to save it till she was sober.

I went home and straight to bed that night, hoping I would fall asleep fast and be able to wake up before I needed to check out of the motel in the morning.

In the morning, I woke up with only 30 minutes left before I would have to pay for another night. I quickly grabbed my few things together and put them in the Rabbit. I went into the office and checked out just in time.

I drove the Rabbit to its new parking space behind the shop at my new apartment. I left my stuff inside while I went to get the keys from Stacey.

He was alone in the garage today and I assumed that Pete was still sleeping off last night. How could Stacey _not_ catch on to what she was up to? Or did he just not care that much? And if he didn't care, why was Pete worried about me telling him?

Stacey had a few forms for me to sign. I gave him cash for the deposit and first week's rent and he gave me my keys.

I went back to the Rabbit and grabbed my things before climbing the four flights of stairs to 4A, my new apartment.

I smiled at Pete's apartment, picturing her passed out inside.

I unlocked the door to my apartment and walked inside. It was a weird feeling, the first time I'd ever had a place that was really mine.

I walked down the hall and set my things down on the floor next to the couch.

"Surprise!" Pete jumped out from around the corner in the kitchen.

"Pete!" I yelled, shocked.

"Congratulations!" She held up a six-pack of beer.

"What are you doing in here?" I asked.

"Celebrating with you!" It sounded like everything she'd said so far should have an exclamation point after it.

"How did you get in?"

"Stacey's duplicate key." She said the answer like it had been a ridiculous question.

"Do you do that to all the new tenants?" I teased.

She pulled a beer out and opened it. "Only the ones I like." She handed the beer to me and took another out.

"I'm honored." I raised my beer in a toast. "To my new apartment."

She raised hers as she sat down on the couch. "To the future." I couldn't be certain but I don't think she meant the club.

I stepped closer to her so we could tap our beers together. We both took a drink.

"If you plan on letting yourself into my place often, you should know that I'll be walking around naked a lot." I took another drink.

"Consider me warned," she smiled.

I took another drink and then set my beer down. I picked up my things and began putting them away.

"Wow, you really left with nothing, huh?" Pete asked as she watched me, sipping her beer.

This was the closest either of us had come to asking a question about the other's past.

"I was in a hurry," I told her honestly.

"So was I… when I left… but I had more than _that_." She pointed to the dwindling pile of stuff.

"You're a girl," I responded.

"I'm not the kind of girl who's got a ton of crap though," she defended.

"Sure, sure."

She stood up and came over to me. "Come on, then." She took my hand.

I let her lead me, grabbing my beer as we passed it. We left my apartment – leaving the door open and walked into hers – the door was unlocked.

Pete's place was a mirror image of my own – the same, only reversed.

"Go ahead," she swept her arm around the room. "Inspect. You'll see I'm not like all the girly-girls you've known."

I chuckled as I walked around a little. "I actually haven't known many 'girly-girls.'"

"Really?" she asked. "I'd have pegged a strong guy like you for the girly damsel in distress type."

Thinking of what might be "my type" made me think of Bella. She was certainly in need of saving but she didn't want to be saved so I didn't think she counted as a damsel in distress. And Bella had never been very girly.

"Ah." Pete drew out the word.

"What?" I asked.

"You left because of a girl."

Had my pause really given that much away? I nodded.

She sat down on the couch and patted the seat next to her for me to join her. I did.

"I'm not gonna bug you about it; I know how that is and I hate it. But if you wanna talk, I wanna listen."

I suddenly had a desperate need to do just that – though I would have to be careful to leave out some things.

"She's married now," I said quietly.

"Ouch," Pete replied before finishing off her beer.

I tried to think of what else there was to say – what else I _could_ say.

Coming up with nothing I finally said, "I'm a good listener too." I looked her in the eyes.

Pete gave me a quick smile before standing up. She shook her empty beer bottle at me. "I'm empty."

I drained what was left in my bottle and stood up with her.

We walked back across the hall to my still-open door – leaving Pete's door open this time.

Pete opened another beer before passing it to me and then opened another for herself.

"So I guess I owe you one for last night, huh?" I sat down on the couch.

She sat down next to me. "Friends don't keep track of favors," she replied.

"Thanks, by the way. I don't know what to do about Daisy."

"You've only got two options." Pete shook her head. "Sleep with her and keep her happy. Or convince her you're sleeping with me. Daisy isn't very good at taking 'no' for an answer."

"Why me?" I put my face in my hands.

"You're her type," Pete said simply.

"16 year olds are her type?" I asked, disbelieving.

Pete laughed. It brought a smile to my face and I lifted my head up to look at her.

"Big, tall, strong, gorgeous, _muscled_ guys are her type." She chuckled again. "Apparently the fact that sex with you would be _illegal_ for her is only a small obstacle."

I chuckled with her. "Daisy must not have any bouncers that stick around for long."

Pete laughed harder. "Shawn and I already have a bet going about how long _you'll_ last."

"How long do you guys give me?" I picked my beer back up and took a long drink. I was falling behind Pete again.

She completely lost control then and was laughing so hard she couldn't form words. It was infectious; I laughed hysterically with her.

I calmed down first but not by much.

"Shawn only gave you a week. That's why I had to help you last night. I gave you a month." Pete finished her beer and grabbed another.

"Thanks for the vote of confidence," I said, trying to sound hurt. I drained my beer and picked up the last one.

"You don't know Daisy like we do," she chuckled.

"Guess I should start looking for another job if I want to keep this place."

"You gotta make it a month for me, Jake," she pleaded with a chuckle.

"I'll see what I can do," I promised.

Pete hung out until I had to get ready for work.

She gave me a smile over her shoulder as she went out the front door and I went into the bathroom to shower.

I got to work that night to find out that Shawn had the night off; the bartender that night was Carlos who I hadn't met before. I wondered if he knew Pete and would let her drink. Or would she be spending Shawn's night off with him?

The night was pretty uneventful until I was almost off. The doors were locked and Carlos and I were nearly finished straightening up.

A loud banging on the window, followed by a giggle, brought my head whipping around.

Pete stood outside, peering in. A group of her friends, including Shawn, were further back on the sidewalk. She was holding up a bottle of tequila and grinning. When I caught her eyes she smiled wider and pointed to me, then herself, then the bottle.

I smiled and nodded which made her smile grow wider. She turned and skipped back to her friends and they all proceeded down the sidewalk, headed in the direction of home.

Carlos was chuckling when I turned my attention back to putting the chairs upside down on top of the tables. "Pete got to you too, huh?"

I blushed and nodded. "I guess that's a good way to put it."

"I'll finish up, man. Catch up to your friends." He was shaking his head at me.

"Nah. Thanks though. I'll catch 'em when we're done." I wanted to follow them but resisted the urge. I knew where they were going and I didn't want to mess up so soon on the new job.

Carlos' eyes grew wider with disbelief but he nodded and went back to what he was doing.

It wasn't long before we were finished and I hurried home, first paycheck in hand. I could hear Pete, Shawn and their friends inside Pete's apartment; they all seemed to be having a good time. I went into my place first; I wanted a quick shower before joining them.

I stepped out of the shower a few minutes later and wrapped a towel around myself. The sound of Pete and her friends was louder and it took me a minute to put together that they were in _my_ apartment now.

I hadn't brought clothes with me into the bathroom. I had also warned Pete.

I opened the bathroom door and walked out, trying to look confident – cocky even.

Three pairs of eyes turned to look up at me from the main room. I walked towards them, hoping I was swaggering.

As I met the eyes of the two girls I didn't know I thought it might be working; they both blushed a little before looking down – at my bare torso – and then away, blushing more.

I grinned and met Pete's eyes. She was smiling at me, looking completely unaware of the effect I had on her friends.

"Ready for a shot, Jake?" Pete asked.

"Sure, sure. Let me get some clothes on." I patted Pete's head as I passed her on my way to the dresser.

I heard her pouring a shot of tequila as I pulled jeans and a t-shirt out of the dresser and turned around to head back to the bathroom.

Pete had gotten up with the shot glass in her hand and was standing in my path.

"You can do one shot naked," she grinned, holding it out to me.

I walked to her and took the glass. "I'm not naked," I clarified. "I'm in a towel."

I lifted the glass to my lips, holding my clothes tucked under the other arm and didn't see Pete's movement.

My towel fell down as she gave it a yank, at the same moment the tequila hit my throat.

I lowered the glass and glared into her eyes, stifling a cough.

"Naked," she said simply, smiling.

I set the glass down, picked up my fallen towel – not bothering to wrap it back around myself, and walked back into the bathroom, laughing all the while.

"Pete!" one of the other girls squealed quietly. "He is _perfect_."

"Jake's gorgeous," Pete agreed lightly.

"And you're not after him?" the third voice asked.

"Jake's a _friend_," Pete confirmed.

I smiled to know that Pete considered me her friend already. I fought the urge to remain in the bathroom and eavesdrop.

I tossed my towel over the shower curtain rod and walked back out – this time with my jeans and shirt on.

"Ready to try one clothed?" Pete teased as I walked down the hall.

I took the shot glass she held out and knocked it back.

Noticing the stares of Pete's friends, I tried to include them. "Quit trying to get me drunk, Pete. Share with your friends." I gestured toward them.

She turned her attention back to them with a smile. She refilled their glasses and turned to me again. "You're behind though, Jake," she said as she poured more tequila into the glass still in my hand.

I raised the glass up towards the other girls, like I was toasting again, before downing the shot.

The best way to find out if a werewolf can get drunk is to try, I suppose.

"What happened to Shawn?" I wondered as Pete refilled my glass again.

"They're watching some guy movie at Pete's still." The blonde's voice matched up with the voice who'd said I was perfect.

I turned my attention to her. "I imagine you've gathered that I'm Jake." I smiled at her.

She giggled, a little shy. "Yea. I'm Lexi."

"Hi, Lexi," I smiled.

"I'm April," the brunette added, bolder, not wanting to be left out.

"Hi, April." I turned my smile to her.

"So you're the new bouncer at The Future, huh?" Lexi asked with a smirk.

"Daisy thinks I'm sleeping with him," Pete laughed before I could say anything.

All three girls erupted in laughter.

"Alright, I've gotta go more often for the next few weeks," April said, collecting herself.

"We could both be sleeping with him!" Pete exclaimed.

"If she thinks I'm a slut, that's only going to make her try harder," I complained.

Lexi nodded. "He's right."

"You took the tequila!" Shawn yelled as he walked into my apartment. "Hey, Jake," he added when he saw me.

"You think I'd let you take over my TV, my couch, my apartment _and my tequila_?" Pete hugged the bottle to her.

I laughed. "The girl's got a point."

Pete beamed at me, clearly pleased that I was on her side.

Another guy I didn't know wandered into my apartment. "Need help, Shawn?"

I nodded at him once. "Hey."

"Gabe." He nodded back.

"Jake," I replied.

"Figured," he said with half a smile. He turned his attention to Pete. "Tequila?" he asked hopefully.

She grinned at him but clutched the bottle still.

Shawn turned to me. "Your loyalties are going to be tested already I'm afraid."

I shook my head. "I don't have the tequila."

Shawn raised an eyebrow at me. "No, but I think you're the only one of _us_ who can get it."

"Us?" I asked, suspicious.

"The guys," he clarified.

Pete burst into laughter again.

I held my hands up, palms out, in surrender. "Not getting involved." I pronounced each word separately and clearly.

Pete lifted one hand off the bottle to blow a kiss to me.

Shawn thought this was his opportunity and lunged for the bottle.

Lexi and April sprang to help Pete at the same time Gabe moved to help Shawn.

"I'm on Team Tequila," I laughed as I snatched the bottle from mid-air, saving it from crashing to the floor, hoping no one would really notice that I shouldn't have been able to do that – they were all drunk, right?

They were all still in a jumble on the floor, laughing and cussing, apparently unaware that the bottle was no longer in the fight. I poured myself another shot and waited for any of them to notice me before drinking. Pete was the first to look up at me and I threw the shot back.

"Jake!" Pete cried and scrambled out of the mess. "You're my tequila hero!" She charged me and threw her arms around me.

I poured another shot and held it in front of her. She opened her mouth and pressed her lips to the glass, not using her hands. I poured the shot into her mouth.

"Is that what we all have to do to get any more?" April laughed, clearing not actually objecting to the idea.

I grinned wickedly but then passed the bottle to her.

Pete let me go and flopped down, taking up the whole couch.

I went into the kitchen and opened the fridge before remembering that I hadn't bought any food yet.

"There's nothing in there," I complained as I came back into the living room.

"You sound surprised, Jake," Pete laughed.

"I forgot," I moped.

She stood up from the couch, making a show of how much effort it took her.

"Let's go get Jake some food," she sighed.

I beamed at her.

Gabe, Pete and I went while the others hung out at Pete's. I drove since I was the only sober one; _if_ werewolves can get drunk, it takes more than a half dozen shots.

The 24-hour Safeway wasn't far. Pete messed with the radio and wound up on a station I liked. I programmed it into the first button and Pete smiled.

At the store, I tried to focus on buying some essentials; I didn't have a lot of money left. I would cash my first paycheck tomorrow and be better off. I bought milk, cereal, stuff to make sandwiches, and a frozen pizza for that night. Pete bought ice cream and Gage bought a case of beer.

The rest of the night was fun; I really liked Pete's friends. I felt comfortable in the group and they seemed comfortable with me.

Gabe and Lexi left first. Pete went and lay down on my bed. A few minutes later we heard light snoring and knew she'd passed out. Shawn and April left then, wishing me luck getting my bed back.

I took my shirt off and traded my jeans for cut-off sweats before trying to get the girl out of my bed.

"Pete?" I said quietly.

She snored back at me.

I nudged her a little. "Pete."

She rolled away from me.

"I can carry you to your own bed, Pete," I offered.

She grunted.

"I need to sleep too, Pete," I complained.

"Then sleep, Jake," she whined. "I don't have cooties."

I shrugged and lay down next to her. "Last chance," I whispered.

She snored in reply.


	5. Chapter 5

**Previously…**

**I took my shirt off and traded my jeans for cut-off sweats before trying to get the girl out of my bed.**

"**Pete?" I said quietly.**

**She snored back at me.**

**I nudged her a little. "Pete."**

**She rolled away from me.**

"**I can carry you to your own bed, Pete," I offered.**

**She grunted.**

"**I need to sleep too, Pete," I complained.**

"**Then sleep, Jake," she whined. "I don't have cooties."**

**I shrugged and lay down next to her. "Last chance," I whispered.**

**She snored in reply.**

I woke up the next morning and froze when I came to enough to gather the position I was in. With a chuckle – ignoring my body's natural reaction – I lifted my hand off of the breast of the girl sleeping next to me. I untangled my legs from Pete's and rolled away from her.

I stretched and stood up. I checked the time and was surprised that it was only 10:00. We hadn't gone to sleep until after 5:00. But I knew I wouldn't be able to fall back asleep.

I went into the kitchen and got myself a bowl of cereal as quietly as I could. After I ate I reviewed the local map I'd picked up. I should let the wolf out for a while.

The most promising green blob was back north, just across the Golden Gate Bridge that I'd taken to get to San Francisco. I put a t-shirt on, grabbed my shoes, and left.

I was already in my car when I wondered if I should have left a note for Pete or something. I shrugged it off; a note would probably insult Pete.

The short drive passed quickly. I parked the car inside Mt. Tamalpias State Park. I walked barefoot into the woods and stripped off my clothes when I was certain no one was around.

I phased with a man-to-wolf sigh of relief. My wolf wasn't used to being kept inside for so long. Back in La Push I'd been phasing at least once a day. And then I'd spent so much time living as the wolf. Keeping the wolf inside for lengths of time _did_ seem to be getting easier but it was going to take some practice.

As I ran I tried to keep track of the sun's position in the sky. I didn't want to miss work. I wolf-chuckled at the face Daisy would make if I told her the truth about where I was.

After I figured it was around 6:00 I made myself head back toward the Rabbit and return to human form. I put on my clothes quickly and got back in the car.

Pete wasn't around when I got home. I showered and threw on clean clothes before leaving to run some quick errands. I passed by a used clothes store and picked up a few decent enough t-shirts, two pairs of sweats, and a pair of black jeans. I would have gotten shoes but there weren't any that fit.

I'd blown it on cashing my paycheck today – it wasn't something I'd ever had to worry about before. They hadn't had any banks in the forest and they were all closed by now.

I ate some fast food before heading to work.

The night passed smoothly and quickly without the appearance of my would-be-lover boss. Pete came by, drank too much and stumbled home. Drunk Pete was about as graceful as sober Bella. I wondered if Bella drank if she'd be able to walk at all.

In the back of my mind I knew that by now Bella would probably rather be drinking Pete than _with_ Pete but I pushed it out of my head.

It was getting easier to push Bella out of my head when she barged in. I wondered if I would ever be able to think of her without hurting, without trying to bury the thoughts before they could hurt me.

After Shawn and I had cleaned up, we walked home together. More accurately, I walked home and Shawn walked to Pete's.

"Did you see the redhead in the red dress?" Shawn asked as we started out.

"Who didn't?" I smiled, remembering her. She had been gorgeous.

Shawn chuckled.

"So, Pete's not your girl," I started. "And I never thought she was," I added quickly. "Is there someone else?"

Shawn shook his head, looking at his feet.

"I didn't mean to pry." There was something Shawn obviously didn't want to tell me.

"No big deal. I'm just upset the redhead didn't wait around for me to get off," he joked.

I laughed. "She didn't wait around for me either, bro."

"Girls like that don't wait around for anybody, I guess," he chuckled. "What about you? I mean, I know you just got into town but… Is there anybody back home or anything?"

I wasn't sure what to say. Finally I shrugged.

Shawn seemed to think that was a good enough answer. "Women," he chuckled. "Can't live with 'em; can't get laid without 'em."

We both laughed as I tapped in the code at the gate and then unlocked the door to the building.

I followed Shawn up the stairs and said goodnight as he went in Pete's unlocked door.

I was about to jump straight in the shower when I heard someone in the kitchen.

"Pete?" I called.

"Hey Jake!" she called back. "I didn't hear you come in."

We met in the living room.

"Shawn just went to your place," I told her.

"He'll figure it out," she smiled.

As if on cue there was a knock on the door.

"Come in, Shawn!" Pete yelled with a smile for me.

"Hey again, Jake." Shawn gave me a small smile and walked up to Pete. "Hi." He gave her a kiss on the cheek.

"What do you boys wanna do tonight?" Pete asked.

"I'm taking a shower," I declared, heading back to the bathroom, remembering to grab pants to put on afterward.

I showered quickly and was surprised to hear more voices when I got out. I put my sweats on and hung the towel over the curtain rod.

Pete's gang was all back. They'd pushed the furniture up against the walls and sat in a circle on the floor. There was a gap between Lexi and Pete which made me notice that they sat alternated boy, girl, boy, girl.

"Jake's here! We can start!" April said excitedly.

"Start what?" I walked into the room and grabbed an unopened beer from the case near them.

When I got close enough I noticed the empty tequila bottle on the floor in the middle of them.

"Spin the bottle." Lexi eyed my bare torso as she spoke.

I shrugged and went to sit cross-legged in the empty seat. Lexi patted my knee and gave me a smile.

"Jake should go first. We're in his house," April offered with a wink at me.

"I never get to go first and we're usually in _my_ house," Pete complained.

It occurred to me then that I didn't really know the history behind this group. Had any of them dated? Slept together? Chances were slim that they had all always been platonic, though that's how they all seemed now.

"You go first then, Pete," I suggested.

"See why we should keep him?" Pete asked no one in particular.

"Shut up and spin." Gabe rolled his eyes.

Pete spun the bottle. We all watched as it spun. It landed pointing to Gabe and Pete turned to him and pressed his lips to hers. I wouldn't call it chaste but it wasn't a kiss a person would be embarrassed to do in public either.

Side conversations struck up as Gabe spun the bottle. Everybody laughed when it pointed to Shawn.

"Do over," Gabe proclaimed and spun again.

The bottle pointed to April and they met in the middle for a kiss similar to the one he'd just shared with Pete.

April spun the bottle and her eyes were on me as it circled. Was she willing the bottle to land on me? If she had been, it had worked.

I leaned forward slightly as she crawled sexily toward me. If the other kisses had been about a three on a kiss scale (one being a kiss you'd give a family member and a ten being a hot, steamy kiss you'd give a lover mid-coitus), the kiss April gave me was at least a five.

As she backed away she breathed, "Kisses have to get steamier as we all get drunker."

I smiled at her, her soft lips still on my mind.

It was my turn then and I watched the bottle as it spun. It stopped pointing at back at April.

Her face lit into a smile and she crawled back to me, more confident this time. A six that time, maybe a seven.

April's eyes were on me again as the bottle spun but it landed this time on Pete.

I tried to stop my jaw from dropping as the two girls leaned across the circle and kissed. It was at least a four.

Gabe sighed as they parted. "That's my favorite part of this game," he said happily.

"I think that's gonna have to be mine too," I agreed.

All three girls chuckled.

"Men are so predictable," Lexi sighed.

Pete spun and I thought I saw a flash of something in Shawn's eyes when the bottle landed on him. A six was followed by a soft sigh from Shawn.

"I need another beer before I spin." Shawn began to get up to get one but I reached them behind me and passed one to him.

He opened it, taking a long swig before setting the bottle turning. It landed on me and Shawn promptly spun the bottle again. It pointed to Lexi this time and they kissed – a four.

There was more to how steamy these kisses were than just how drunk everyone was.

Lexi's spin landed on me and she seemed almost as happy as April had been. Another six, almost seven.

The night wore on until we all wanted some food. This brought the game to a close since no one wanted to kiss everyone else with food breath. The only pair that hadn't kissed – that was willing to kiss, not the guy on guy pairs - had been Pete and I.

Pete left when the others did that night and I had my bed to myself.

The sun was just beginning to shine in my windows when my eyes flew open. I stayed still and quiet, trying to figure out what had woken me.

My front door clicked closed and there were soft footsteps coming down the hall.

I rolled over on the bed, preparing myself for anything to come around the corner.

Pete came into view looking tired and I smiled at her.

"It's cold," she murmured, crawling into bed with me.

"Not anymore," I whispered back, wrapping one arm around her.

We were both back asleep in moments.

In the morning – _my_ morning at least since it was well after noon, I got ready and went to the bank. I got half my small paycheck in cash and started an account with the other. I had a temporary checkbook until the regular one and the ATM card would come in the mail.

I bought a bunch of postcards at the grocery store – and a lot more groceries, including alcohol since it seemed to be present so much in my new life.

_Dad,_

_I'm running out of things to say. As long as you keep getting postcards from me then there's no need to worry._

_Love, Jake_

_Bella,_

_I'm still alive. Are you? I hope so._

_Your Jacob_

Apparently I would be sending both Billy and Bella postcards for the rest of my life. I couldn't seem to stop myself.

Daisy was already there when I got to work and I winced knowing it would probably be a couple hours before Pete would show up.

Surprisingly she left me alone for a while. She must have been busy with work though I had hoped she'd given up on me with not only the knowledge of my age but the assumption that Pete and I were together.

When I saw Daisy approaching me with two sodas on a tray and an extra bar stool I knew my hopes had been in vain.

She handed me a soda and sat down on her own stool.

"How're you liking the city?" she asked, sounding friendly enough.

"I haven't seen a lot of it but I'm doing pretty good here," I told her honestly.

"That's great," she replied and I wasn't even sure she'd been listening to me. Her eyes were constantly raking across my body.

Realizing I had stopped speaking a while ago her eyes came up to my face. "So, you and Pete?" she asked, still trying to sound light.

"Seems that way." I tried to stay vague.

"You sure you want commit to the first girl you meet in a new city?" She was trying to sound concerned for me but I knew better.

"Pete wasn't the first girl I met," I smiled. "You were."

That shut Daisy up.

For a minute anyway. "What do you like to do after work, Jake?"

"Go home to Pete." I tried to keep my self-satisfied smile from looking _too_ self-satisfied.

I'd managed to silence her again.

Also momentarily. "Do you wanna do me a favor, Jake?" Her voice stayed flippant.

Before I could come up with a response to that my savior rounded the corner.

"Speak of my love muffin and she shall appear," I said loudly enough for Pete to hear with a chuckle.

She sped up her pace, laughing.

I stood and held my arms open to embrace her.

When Pete reached me I threw my arms tight around her and spun her in a circle. Setting her down I leaned in to whisper – not so quiet that Daisy couldn't hear, "I've _missed_ you." I kissed her neck just below her ear before standing back up.

"I'll bet you have," Pete laughed, poking my chest playfully.

"I should be heading out for the night," Daisy mumbled, already walking inside.

"There's no way I'd make it a month without you, Pete," I chuckled.

"I might just have to split my winnings with you." Pete plopped down on the stool that Daisy had left out.

I sat down next to her. "You heading in?"

"I'm meeting Lexi tonight. I'll wait with you." Pete glanced inside then though. She grinned and waved when she caught Shawn's eye.

"Sure thing, love muffin," I chuckled.

Pete laughed. "Yea, where'd you come up with that one?"

"She'd just asked me for a favor. I panicked."

"Hmm," she said thoughtfully. "I might have to threaten her if you're gonna last a month."

Lexi gave me a hug when she arrived and both girls went inside.

That night the group hung out at Pete's – her TV is marginally bigger than mine - watching cheesy movies and laughing. There was alcohol, of course, but no one got completely plowed.

I was a few steps behind everyone else leaving and Pete stopped me with her hand on my arm.

"My bed's more comfy but so cold," she whined.

"I'll be back," I chuckled and went to change into my sweats.

Days began to fly by and I settled into this new routine – my new life.

I slept late every day, waking up to spend my day by myself – doing laundry, grocery shopping, driving to Mt. Tam to run, cleaning my apartment.

I worked every night; Daisy had no other bouncers and I didn't really need any time off. I would try to avoid time with Daisy – usually rather unsuccessfully. On days when Shawn worked, Pete would come, sometimes with others from the gang. If Daisy was around, Pete would lavish affection on me. When Carlos worked – usually two days a week – it was more difficult. I'd talk about Pete a lot. It wasn't hard; we'd grown really close.

After work, Pete was in my apartment already more days than not – often others were with her. The only thing that changed about Pete was her hair color. It'd been orange when we met, then a green that had only lasted two days and it was currently blue. Most of the time, the rest of the gang came over too – Shawn, Gabe, Lexi and April. If someone was missing – which was fairly rare – it was generally assumed that they'd met someone else to spend the night with. No one was gone two nights in a row. Only Pete, Shawn and I were never missing. We stayed up until the early hours of the morning. They seemed to have an endless supply of drinking games though some favorites were repeated often.

Pete and I shared a bed nearly every night – sometimes mine, sometimes hers. On rare nights when I went to bed alone Pete would often creep in to join me in the middle of the night. Our friends all knew and I think it made Shawn uncomfortable. I didn't really benefit from it but I didn't mind at all either. It seemed to make Pete happy – she swore she slept better than she ever had before – and that was enough to make me happy.

Before I knew it nearly three weeks had passed. I only realized when I saw the date on my paycheck. September 10th. I couldn't stop the flood of thoughts of home – including the realization of how little I'd thought about it all. Bella's birthday was only three days away. I wondered if she was alive – in any form – to see it. If she wasn't – or was but couldn't be around humans – how would Charlie be doing? I wished I could be there with him, grieve with him.

Against my better judgment I sent out two more postcards that day.

_Bella,_

_Happy Birthday. I hope you're happy._

_Your Jacob_

_Dad,_

_I'm doing alright. I'd call but I don't want to know how things are there._

_Love, Jacob_

A few days later, the morning of Bella's birthday, I told Pete before I left her bed that I wanted to be alone that night. I knew that getting through today with little to no thoughts of Bella and home would be impossible. I didn't want everyone around to witness it. Pete seemed to sense I was serious and agreed without protesting.

I drove north and ran that day. I let the wolf take over as much as I could while remembering to watch the sun so I wouldn't miss work. I'd thought about taking the night off but that would only leave me more free time alone.

At work that night I did something I hadn't done in a while; I tried desperately to imprint on every girl I saw. I felt certain now – though I'd never really believed it before - that she was out there, _somewhere_, and I just had to find her. I was succeeding on my own at getting over Bella; it would be so easy and so _instant_ if I found my imprint though.

Pete was in my apartment when I got home.

"Pete, I asked to be alone," I said gruffly.

"And we are," Pete agreed.

"I meant just me," I clarified.

"Not gonna happen, Jake." She shook her head at me.

"Get out, Pete!" I yelled, sounding meaner than I had meant to.

She stood up and planted her feet shoulder width apart. "No, Jake," she said firmly.

I growled at her without thinking.

"Jacob Black, knock it off!" she yelled. Her voice was lower when she continued. "I know it's about the girl – birthday or anniversary or something. We don't have to talk about it. But I don't think you should be alone tonight. The guys aren't coming. It's just you and me tonight."

I sighed, resigning myself to it. I'd never been one to try and stop a stubborn girl from getting her way. Well, except that _one_ girl and only that _one_ thing she wanted. On some level I knew I would probably thank Pete for this later.

"I'm not going to be pleasant company," I warned her.

"Even when you're growling at me, Jake, I find you pleasant." She smiled warmly at me.

"What should we do besides wallow in my misery then?" I asked.

"Let's play a game!" Pete said excitedly.

"Like Monopoly?" I asked, teasing, trying to match Pete's level of cheer.

"No, like a drinking game, Jacob!" She skipped into the kitchen and came back with a bottle of tequila and two shot glasses.

"Kay." I sat down on the couch.

"How about 'I've never?'"

"'I've never?'"

Pete laughed as she sat down next to me. "We each take turns saying something like, 'I've never taken a shot of tequila.' And then since we both _have_, we both have to take a shot. If I said, 'I've never died,' then neither of us have to take a drink because the statement is true for us both."

This game could be trouble. I leered at Pete and said, "I've never played 'I've never.''

Pete chortled and happily poured herself a shot. She drank it before coming up with a line for her turn.

"I've never worked as a bouncer."

I smiled, poured a shot, and drank it. "I've never kissed a guy."

Pete took a shot. "I've never kissed a girl," she laughed and poured us both a shot.

We downed our drinks together. "I've never dyed my hair," I said easily.

She smiled as she took her drink. She balled her hands into fists and jabbed at the air. "I've never been in a fistfight."

I chuckled as I poured myself a shot. "I've never stolen anything."

Pete made a guilty face and did another shot. "I've never had sex with a girl."

Crap. Taking a shot now would be a lie… But did I want Pete to know this truth?

I hesitated too long.

"Shut up, Jake!" she squealed and pushed my shoulder.

I blushed and shrugged.

"You aren't like, saving yourself or something are you?" She made a face like she'd taken a bite of something rotten.

"No," I laughed. "I would've with… And then I could've but…"

Pete laughed with me. "Well, I'm sure Daisy would be happy to help you out," she suggested.

"Yea, Daisy is _exactly_ what I want for my first time," I said with sarcasm. "Maybe I should call her now."

I changed the subject by making Pete take another shot. "I've never been so drunk I threw up."

"I've never been to third base?" Pete made it sound like a question.

Pete poured us both a shot, drank hers and then waited to be sure I wouldn't be drinking mine.

I didn't. "Define third base."

"Jacob Black, we're gonna have to get you _laid_!" she laughed.

I laughed too. "Getting laid wouldn't be a problem." I paused and my tone was more serious when I went on. "Call me corny, but I just think the first time should be… special… or something."

Pete put her hand on my leg. "That's really sweet, Jake."

Pete's game had let her find out so much about me. I put thought into my next question, hoping to find out something juicy. "I've never slept with Shawn."

She grabbed the shot she'd poured for me on her last turn and drank it.

I smiled at her. "When?"

"When I first met him," she answered. "It was just the one time. Before I knew how much I liked him. I wouldn't want to mess our friendship up."

I nodded my head. "That explains a lot."

"Like what?"

I shook my head. "Nothing really. Just, Shawn sometimes."

She changed the subject quickly. "You need to catch up." Pete began pouring me another shot. "I've never been to Washington."

I took my drink with a smile. "I've never slept with Gabe."

Pete looked triumphant as she sat further back in the couch, making it clear she wouldn't be taking a drink.

I laughed at her gesture.

"I've never been to Oregon." Pete was obviously still trying to make me catch up.

I took the drink, wondering if maybe after this game I would know for sure, one way or another, if werewolves were able to get drunk.

"I've never lied to you," I smiled.

She leaned over to me and gave me a quick hug. "That's sweet, Jake." She motioned toward the glasses. "See me not taking one either?"

I smiled at her.

Pete pulled back into her own seat. "But you're still behind. I've never lived in 4A."

I took another shot. "Six to Eight. And you know more about me than I would've wanted," I laughed.

"That's one of the great things about this game," Pete chuckled. "Everyone's a winner!"

"I've never had a pregnancy scare." I held the bottle poised to pour a shot for Pete with a questioning look on my face.

She chuckled and shook her head. "Condoms are my friends."

I laughed.

She took the bottle from me with a gleam in her eye and poured both glasses full before she spoke. "I've never had a lustful thought about you." Keeping her eyes on mine she picked up her glass and drank.

"I'm a guy, aren't I?" I chuckled before picking up my glass and draining it.

She smiled at me. "Good to know," she said lightly.

"I've never worried that one of us felt something more than the other." I filled both glasses though I wouldn't be drinking on this turn.

"No, we've always been on the same page," she said, knowing I wouldn't be drinking.

I smiled at her again. "It's nice isn't it?"

"What exactly?" she asked.

"Having one thing in life be predictable and normal and just how it should be."

"You have no idea," she agreed.

I felt a sharp pang when I realized that _this_ was exactly what Bella had wanted for the two of us to have. It depressed me that I had not been able to give it to her. At least I had done better for Pete.

I wanted to get it all out then, to tell Pete everything. There was a lot I would need to leave out but I could certainly share more than I had.

"Her name is Bella. Bella Swan. Well, she _was _Bella Swan. I suppose she's Bella _Cullen_ now."

I paused and looked at Pete, trying to guess whether or not she really cared to hear all this or not. She was looking at me, her expression serious so I continued.

"Our dad's have been friends since before we were born. She came to live with him about two years ago. I liked her from the moment I saw her. She's a little older and made her own friends at school so I didn't see her very often at first. And she started dating Cullen. My crush on her didn't change cause I figured high school relationships never last long, right?" I chuckled, remembering. "When he left town, breaking up with her, I thought I would finally get a chance with her. But she didn't take it well. Worse than I'd ever seen anyone after a break-up. She lived her life like a zombie for months."

I felt a smile spread on my face as I remembered the day that changed it all. "One day, out of nowhere, she showed up at my place with two broken down motorcycles, hoping I could fix them. It was our secret; her dad would have killed her. She watched me while I fixed them up, not even realizing that she was being fixed too. Bella started to smile and laugh again and it felt so good to know that it was because of me.

"I don't know when exactly my feelings grew from a crush to love. We rode the bikes together; Bella got hurt. A lot. But she loved it so I would never have asked her to stop. I told her that I was in love with her and I knew she didn't feel the same. I told her that I didn't care that her feelings weren't the same as long as she wanted to be my friend. And I meant it. I would have waited for Bella forever."

My thoughts clouded over, filled with things I couldn't share with Pete. It had been the night that Bella and I had talked about my feelings that I had first phased into a werewolf. As if that hadn't been enough, I learned that Cullen was a vampire and that Bella had known all along. Sam had tried to convince me it was too dangerous to be around Bella – that I could hurt her – but I couldn't stay away. And then when we found out that there were bloodsuckers around – the kind that wanted to eat Bella – our friendship grew back together, stronger and it felt _good_ to be able keep her safe.

I pulled myself back to things I could share with Pete and went on. "Bella swore over and over again that we couldn't be more than friends. But all the while we were getting closer; Bella was falling in love with me."

My chest tightened at the next memory and I took a long drink straight from the bottle of tequila before continuing. "We were nearly there; we nearly kissed. Cullen's sister picked that moment to interrupt us. She told Bella that Cullen was in some kind of trouble and Bella dropped everything – dropped me – to run to help him."

I took another drink and glanced at Pete. She gave me a small smile and I filled up her shot glass. She drank it and gave me another smile.

"After that he was back; his family moved back. And Bella went back to him like nothing had ever happened. Like _I_ had never happened. We tried to stay friends but he didn't like her seeing me. I pushed the limits, desperate to make Bella understand what I already knew; that she was in love with me, too."

I took another drink as I thought over how I could share any of the rest of it. A vegetarian vampire alliance with my pack of werewolves to stop the evil leech after Bella and her pack of newborn parasites wasn't exactly something I could share. But I didn't want to leave the night that I'd held Bella in my arms out of the story. Or the kiss we'd shared the next morning before I went to fight them. The kiss that had made Bella realize that I had been right all along. Though it hadn't been enough in the end.

"The rest gets complicated," I said slowly, taking another long pull from the bottle.

"I guess it's enough to say that I kinda tricked her into kissing me. _Really_ kissing me."

I could almost feel her lips on mine; the memory was so vivid.

I poured Pete another shot and then drained the bottle even as I started to wonder if the blurriness of the room was to blame on the pain of my memories or the tequila.

"She knew after that. Knew that she was in love with me. That she had options."

I closed my eyes to focus as I finished. "It wasn't enough. She loved him more."

My voice was barely a whisper when I spoke again, my memories crystal-clear behind my closed eyelids. "She looked so beautiful at her wedding. I try to keep that vision of her in my mind whenever I think about her."

My eyes were still closed but I heard Pete move and then felt her crawl into my lap, wrapping her arms around me.

"This is more of a Petunia thing to say and if you tell anyone I said it I _will_ kill you." She paused. "If she didn't feel the same, Jake, then she wasn't the one. There's not a logical reason for her _not_ to choose you. It has to be fate or destiny or some other cheesy crap. And there's got to be someone better for you."

We were both quiet for a while as she held me. I let her words sink in. I didn't really believe the fate or destiny crap was meant for me anymore than I really hoped I'd ever find my imprint.

Something Pete had said struck me though. "_Petunia?!_"

She flew off my lap and covered her face with her hands, shaking her head. "No, I didn't say that. I couldn't have!"

"Pete is short for _Petunia_?!" My misery over Bella was completely replaced by my shock – if only temporarily.

She looked up at me, fear in her eyes. "If you tell anyone, Jacob Black, I'll… I'll… I'll tell Daisy we broke up!"

I laughed. "I would never tell anyone, Petunia," I said sweetly.

"You _may not_ use that name to address me," she growled, glaring at me.

When I could control my laughter I held up my hands in surrender. "Alright, Pete, alright." I pretended to zip up my lips and throw the key over my shoulder. "My lips are sealed."

"They damn well better be, Jake." She gave me a small smile.

"I wasn't laughing at your name, for the record. I was laughing at your reaction." I picked the bottle of tequila up and tried to take another drink, forgetting I had emptied it.

"Sure, sure," Pete replied.

I laughed again, hearing my favorite sarcastic remark come from Pete for the first time.

"I think you're drunk, Jake," Pete laughed.

"Shit," I muttered, trying to figure out if Pete was right.

"I was beginning to think you couldn't _get_ drunk," Pete said with another laugh.

"Me too," I agreed, suspecting Pete was right. "What do I do now?"

My question sent Pete into a fit of hysterics. They quickly spread to me.

When she could get enough air to speak again Pete shouted, "Drink more!"

I jumped up and headed into the kitchen, retrieving another bottle of tequila before heading back to Pete.

Late that night – early that morning was more accurate, I suppose – I drifted to sleep, Pete in my arms, understanding finally why people tried to drink their problems away.


	6. Chapter 6

**So, we take a pretty serious turn in this chapter and I'm nervous about it… which is what has taken me so long. This chapter is far from my best work but I've struggled long enough with it. **_**Please**_** review… **_**especially**_** if you hate it.**

**Italicized text are direct quotes from SM.**

**Thanks to my husband for the beta and BellaFlan (****http(colon)//www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/u/2092771/****) for the motivation and the confidence to post this. **

**Previously…**

**Late that night – early that morning was more accurate, I suppose – I drifted to sleep, Pete in my arms, understanding finally why people tried to drink their problems away.**

When I woke up Pete was sitting on the edge of the bed, two bottles of water in her hand.

"Hey," I grumbled, my voice still thick with sleep.

"Here," she said, handing me one of the water bottles. "This'll help."

"Help with what?" I asked, taking a long drink of water.

"The hangover." She took a drink of her own water.

I thought for a moment, taking stock of my body and how I felt. I was pretty certain that I felt normal. A whole new reason to be thankful I was a werewolf. "I don't think I have one," I admitted finally.

"You're such an asshole," Pete said, exasperated.

"What'd I do?" I chuckled.

"You drank about a bottle and a half of tequila to _finally_ get drunk and you wake up feeling _fine_." She stood up and walked away from me.

"I'm sorry," I laughed as she stomped away.

"Sure, sure," she muttered before slamming the door behind her.

A few nights later I was at work, Pete was inside drinking, and everything was average. Until Pete walked out of the bar, fanning herself with cash.

She put $50 in my hand with a smile.

"What's this?" I asked.

"Your break-up winnings."

I quirked my eyebrows and sent her a questioning look.

"I won the bet. You've been here a month. I told you I'd split it with you. Daisy doesn't have to think we're together anymore."

I stuffed the cash into Pete's pocket and hugged her to me. "Don't do this to me, love muffin," I begged.

She laughed and pulled away.

"I'm serious," I told her, letting her loose. "Keep your cash and keep pretending to be my girlfriend for Daisy. She's hard to handle as it is!"

"Is poor little Jakey afraid of the big bad Daisy?" she teased.

"Yes," I admitted with a chuckle. "I like my job."

"Okay, Jake," she laughed. "I could do worse." She shrugged her shoulders and ran one finger from the hollow below my Adam's Apple straight down to the edge of my pants.

"Thanks, love muffin," I chuckled again.

Without another word Pete skipped back inside.

I barely noticed time passing; it was marked only by the six days I took off work that first year – each of the gang's birthdays, including my own. We went to different clubs or bars for each. I got hit on a lot more than I did at work when we were out, but I had experience – with Daisy and some of the regulars at The Future and even some with April and Lexi – at letting them down gently.

It wasn't that I wasn't attracted to - and even interested in - some of them. I just couldn't put my heart on the line again. Not when it felt like it was just beginning to heal.

And it _was_ healing. I'd even begun to address Bella's postcards to her married name. I wondered if she noticed. I couldn't help but think about her whenever I sent them. Was she alive?

Was she a vampire? Was she happy? Towards the end of that first year I found myself hoping that if she _had_ been changed that she was past the crazed newborn stage and could try to start a normal life – whatever normal was exactly for a Cullen.

A part of me wanted to call Billy and check in. Maybe we wouldn't have to talk about Bella. But I knew I would ask. So I never called.

The gang insisted that I take off the one-year anniversary of when I had met them all. The night went as expected: club, drinking, dancing, flirting, more drinking, back to my place, drinking games, friends go and stumble home. Pete left when Shawn did and I thought nothing of it; she'd be back sometime during the night.

I was nearly asleep when I heard the familiar sound of Pete coming in. I rolled over to face her, too tired to sit up in bed.

When I heard Pete let out a sob, I was suddenly wide awake and sat bolt upright. I had never really seen Pete upset before and certainly never even _close_ to tears.

"Pete?" I asked, nervous.

"Shh," she whispered and fell on top of me on the bed.

I wrapped my arms around her, stroking her hair.

Her sobs quieted some as I held her.

I wanted desperately to ask her what had upset her, what I could do, who had made her so upset. Could it be Shawn? But I kept quiet, as she had asked.

Without warning Pete sat up on her knees to reach me and pressed her lips to mine. Pete and I had kissed before – for Daisy's sake and during drinking games – but this felt very different. I was frozen; I didn't know what to do.

Pete fisted her hands in my hair and tried to pull me closer. Her mouth was working, trying to get mine to respond.

What was Pete thinking? She was in tears and I knew they couldn't be because of me. She seemed to have come to me for comfort; I'd never comforted anyone like _this_ before.

Resolving that what Pete really needed right now was for me to kiss her – whatever her reasons were, they were her own – I matched my mouth's movements to hers. Our mouths and tongues worked frantically together – worked to fix whatever had upset Pete.

Her mouth broke away from mine but I didn't have time to wonder if we were through before she pulled her shirt off over her head and then removed mine.

She pressed her lips to mine again, more heated than before. I heard the small snap of her bra unhooking. She kept her mouth to mine but pulled her body away and removed her bra.

Pete pushed her body against mine again, her nude breasts smashing into my exposed chest.

I didn't have feelings on this level for Pete; I never had. But I was a guy and I felt my body respond as any guy's would, taking over while my head was still bewildered.

Our kisses became more frantic until Pete pulled away, gasping for air. I placed kisses on her cheeks, her jaw and her ears. I moved to her neck and began trailing kisses lower.

When my mouth found her breast, Pete cried out in pleasure.

Her hands dipped below me and I heard the snap and zipper on her jeans come undone.

She started to pull away and I held on tightly to her nipple in my mouth.

Pete cried out again but continued to pull back. When she had enough space, she lowered her jeans from her hips – her panties going with them – slid them off her ankles and threw them to the floor.

My eyes delighted on the sight of Pete, naked before me. She was beautiful.

Pete came back toward me lower, nearly crawling across the bed. As soon as she was close enough, her hands found the edge of my sweats and pulled them down.

I obliged her, lifting my hips up off the bed so she could slide them off.

"I need you, Jake," Pete whispered, still sounding sad.

She put her hand on my stomach and pressed against it, willing me to lie down.

I indulged her though I was troubled. Was this what I wanted for my first time? It wasn't what I had pictured, of course. But I had told Pete that I wanted it to be special; this would certainly fit that requirement.

As Pete put a condom I hadn't noticed she had with her on me, she whispered, "Please, Jake." I moaned and trembled beneath her touch.

Could I do this? Did I want the memory of my first time to be with a friend? Someone I loved but was not in love with?

Pete moved until she rested just above me, only inches until there was no decision left to make and I smiled at her above me.

Yes, I realized. This would be a wonderful memory. Pete would be comforted. Our friendship would grow closer – I had no doubt that our friendship was strong enough to get through any awkward moments the morning might bring.

I sighed in pleasure – and happiness and contentment – as Pete closed the distance between us.

I woke up the next morning to find myself in the same position I had been in after the first night – so long ago now – Pete had slept in my bed.

I lifted my hand from her – nude this time – breast and pulled my legs out of the tangle they were in with Pete's. I pulled the blanket up over her before getting out of bed.

I found my sweats on the floor and put them on. I got myself a bowl of cereal as quietly as I could.

I was washing my bowl in the sink when I heard Pete waking.

"Jake?" she asked.

I left the bowl in the sink and went to her.

She patted the bed as I approached and I sat down next to her.

She leaned over and pressed her lips to mine, briefly and chastely.

"Thank you," she said sincerely.

"You're welcome."

That was the last time we mentioned that night and it never happened again.

Later that day I sent postcards to Billy and Bella. The letter to Billy was standard. Bella's was different that day.

_Bella,_

_ I think you'd be proud of the life I've made for myself. It's different but I think I'm happy._

_ Jacob (A part of me will always be yours.)_

I never again signed my postcards to Bella "Your Jacob." I wasn't really hers anymore and I knew that now. I wasn't Pete's either – or anyone else's. I was just me. Just Jacob. Bella would always be in my heart, but she didn't own it any longer.

There was one other significant change in my life after that. Having already had my night of something special – and knowing what I had been missing – there was no longer a reason for me to turn down the advances of women I liked.

Daisy was still a road I didn't want to go down for the sake of my job.

Lexi and April I still considered off-limits for the sake of our friendship and the happiness of our little group as a whole.

Any other woman I wanted, I had.

More often than not I simply gave in to a woman's flirtations. Occasionally I would have to approach someone I liked.

I was never turned down.

In fact, there were several women who kept coming back for more, willing to accept whatever I would give them.

I developed something of an ego – though some would say I'd always had one. My friends took it in stride and used it as a new weapon to taunt me.

I didn't want to miss all of my time with my friends and instead took to dating during my days. No one ever lasted more than a handful of dates.

I had plenty of fun but I wasn't willing to give my heart to anyone. I'd been in Leah's head and understood just how much it hurt her when Sam had imprinted on someone else. I wouldn't do that to someone. Besides, I had my friends to be emotionally attached to. So I kept love out of my love life.

Life found another new rhythm and time flew by once more.

About two years later, I woke up to Pete crying softly.

"What is it, Pete?" I asked, sitting up to wrap my arms around her.

She sobbed harder in response.

"Pete, I can't fix it unless I know what's wrong," I whispered.

"You can't fix me, Jake," she sobbed.

I couldn't help but laugh. "I've fixed worse than you."

Pete told me her story then. Once she'd begun she didn't stop until she'd told me everything. Her parents hadn't been abusive but they hadn't really wanted her either. Stacey had been her uncle until he'd divorced her mother's sister. She'd run away to him when she was 11. Stacey had taken her in and told her parents that she wouldn't be coming home. He'd been the one to give her the nickname Pete and had named his shop after her. When she was 14 she'd asked for more privacy and he'd given her the apartment she now lived in. Pete had started dating a guy named Steve shortly afterward. He'd been abusive and it had taken Stacey and the cops to make him leave Pete alone. She'd never taken any relationship seriously since.

And then there was Shawn. She knew he loved her and felt she might love him back but didn't know how to open herself up again. He'd been her friend after the one-night stand they'd had when they met. Shawn had made it clear that he wanted more from her but she had steadfastly refused to give it. Not because her heart was taken by another or even broken beyond repair but because she had locked it away and promised herself that it would stay there. Pete worried she had lost the key to the lock around it.

But she wanted to give it to Shawn.

"Try," I told her. "Pretend, even. It'll start to feel natural and one day you'll wake up and realize that it's already happened."

Pete didn't say anything else and I had no idea if she took my advice or if it would work.

The first thing I noticed was that about a week later Pete stopped sharing my bed.

About a week after that she told me that she would no longer be helping me with Daisy. Hoping my suspicions for the reason were right, I didn't make a big deal about it.

Two weeks after that Pete and Shawn were holding hands, kissing, and cuddling _all the time_.

Daisy was the only person surprised. I was 19 and legal (for sex if not alcohol) by then. Her flirtations – to put it nicely – became aggressive to the point of unbearable. I began to look for a new job.

It was Stacey who brought it up but I was certain Pete was behind it. Stacey had let me use the shop to work on the Rabbit a number of times over the years and seen that I was more than competent. He offered me a job in the shop – for more money than I made at The Future.

Stacey also told me about his own history with Daisy which answered a lot of questions I'd never bothered to ask about why Daisy put up with Pete.

I made sure he thought he could afford it and took him up on the offer.

In the end I had worked for Daisy for longer than any other bouncer and was one of only a handful who had never slept with her.

I let Daisy kiss me goodbye on my last day – about a three on the scale I still used.

Working at the shop meant I had to reorganize my schedule. I worked during the day now – though Stacey was relaxed about what time I showed up. I scheduled dates – and trips to Mt. Tam park to run – for the evenings. I went out to clubs and bars with the gang after and then the standard drinking games or movies or whatever at my place. I didn't let everyone hang out as late as I once had. Sunday was my only day off so I did errands when I had them or went out with the girl of the moment when I didn't.

About a year after settling into this newest routine I sent Bella a postcard that said I'd found happiness. I meant it.

I think I could have – and would have – happily spent the rest of my life that way.

But life – fate, destiny, providence, karma or maybe all of them – had a different plan for me.

It had been a little over eight years since I'd moved to San Francisco. _Eight years_ but I could count on one hand the things that had really changed over the years. One, Pete and Shawn were together – though Pete still winced at the words "boyfriend" and "girlfriend." Two, I dated now – or tried… It wasn't my fault if no one stayed interesting past four or five dates. Three, I could think of Bella without pain. I still lamented some over what might have been but mostly Bella was just a fond memory. Four, I worked at the garage instead of the club and I _really_ loved my job. Five – the best is always last – the bike. _My_ bike. My new motorcycle. _My_ Ducati Streetfighter S. Even getting her used I'd be making payments on her for a while but it was more than worth it.

I'd run into a handful of bloodsuckers over the years and had been able to easily take them all out. I'd never come across more than one at a time and they never seemed to know what I was. All had been red-eyed – or had black eyes with red rims – and I felt nothing but satisfaction over their demise. I wondered from time to time if Bella or her new family knew any of them but I couldn't bring myself to care. If someone I knew turned out to be a murderer I wouldn't feel bad over their death either. I'd also helped more than my share of people from more common crimes as a human. The instinct to be a protector was insuppressible I guess.

I'd taken to frequenting the Metreon with dates. Not only was the movie theatre there better than the one on Van Ness but if the weather took a foul turn there was plenty of room to wander indoors and great places to eat.

Candy – date number two and I didn't think I could take a third date with that ridiculous name – and I stepped out of the elevator and headed toward the bike. The sound of a fast car speeding up the turns of the parking garage made me turn my head.

It was beautiful. A silver Mercedes Benz SLR McLaren Roadster. I was in love. I felt pulled toward the car and couldn't look away.

The driver handled it like he knew what he was doing as he came onto the top floor of the parking garage too fast, drifting into a parking space.

The door opened up and a woman climbed out. That dropped my jaw.

I closed my mouth as she glanced around her at all the attention she'd drawn, giving everyone else on this floor of the garage small smiles, unashamed of the spectacle she'd created.

She had a perfect body and reddish curls that bounced as she swung her head around.

Her eyes met mine – _warm brown eyes, the color of chocolate milk_ – _and heat flooded through me, a new kind of heat._

_It was a glowing._

_Everything inside me came undone as I stared at the _mesmerizing stranger. _All the lines that held me to my life were sliced apart in swift cuts, like clipping the strings to a bunch of balloons. Everything that made me who I was disconnected from me in that second – snip, snip, snip – and floated up into space._

_I was not left drifting. A new string held me where I was._

_Not one string, but a million. Not strings, but steel cables. A million steel cables all tying me to one thing – to the very center of the universe._

_I could see that now – how the universe swirled around this one point. I'd never seen the symmetry of the universe before, but now it was plain._

_The gravity of the earth no longer tied me to the place where I stood._

_It was _she _that held me here now._

**A/N: No offense is meant to anyone named Candy!**


	7. Outtake

**A/N: This outtake (smuttake) is for BellaFlan (****.net/u/2092771/BellaFlan****) because she asked, because I adore her, and because, really, why would I say no to a request like this? : )**

**Please forgive me for posting without a beta… my husband's computer is broken and he won't beta on mine for reason I don't understand. Oh,well. Feel free to let me know of any errors.**

**When I'm having trouble with a scene, I like to go play and figure out what everyone is wearing to help me picture it. I made a collage for this and here's the link if you wanna check it out: http://www(dot)polyvore(dot)com/101_outtake/set?id=15895944**

**Warning: This chapter contains adult themes.**

Sometime during the years rushed by in Chapter 6…

It was too hot in the shop so I went and stood out front while Pete shuffled the completed car out and the next car in line for work in. Not feeling any cooler outside, I unzipped my coveralls down to my hips and held them up with each hand alternately while I shrugged my arms out. I zipped them back up till they stayed hanging at my waist.

Just as I was about to curse San Francisco's weird October heat-wave – as I did every year, always forgetting that summer wasn't really over till November – the bright side of the hot weather came into view around a corner across the street.

One was a brunette with brown eyes and a miniscule green sundress. The other was blonde with blue eyes and had opted for tiny denim shorts with a pale yellow tube top. Both had fairly pale skin and flip flops on their feet.

"Hey, Jake, we're switched out so-" Pete cut herself off when she followed my gaze. "So I guess you're on a break for another minute then."

I glanced at her long enough to see her smile and roll her eyes before heading back in to get started without me.

The girls were directly across the street when the brunette noticed me. I heard her giggle but not what she whispered to her friend. I wiped the sweat off my forehead onto my arm just before the blonde turned to look at me.

Both were cute but the blonde was a lot hotter than her friend.

I gave them a small smile and nodded my head once.

The blonde whispered something back to the brunette and they started giggling and bickering – probably about which one should cross the street.

I did them the favor of crossing over to meet them. They whispered once more back and forth before turning to face me, their arms linked together. Why do women all think there's safety in numbers?

"You ladies having any car trouble?" I smiled.

"What car?" the blonde laughed.

At the same time the brunette flirted, "I could use a tune-up."

I gave the brunette a big smile for her effort but quickly turned my attention back to the blonde. "You need a ride somewhere then?"

The brunette must have given up cause she kept quiet. Blondie replied, "We don't take rides from strangers."

"Jacob Black."

I held my hand out to the brunette first to be polite. "Lori." She shook my hand briefly.

The blonde shook my hand next. "Cailin. And don't you have work to do?"

Neither one offered a last name but that was fine by me – I didn't really need one. On the off chance that I actually liked either one for any length of time I could get it later.

Cailin's eyes roamed over my bare chest again which confirmed that she was interested but playing hard to get.

No big deal – just a different strategy.

I pulled out my phone and pulled up a good picture of Gabe – my wing man and a good looking guy – and showed it to Lori.

"That's Gabe," I told her as Cailin leaned over Lori's shoulder to look. "He's got a thing for brunettes. We're going to be at The End-Up tonight." I let my eyes dart away from hers to look at Cailin again. "Maybe you can bring a friend who'd be interested in me." That was kind of a lie – neither of us, me and Gabe, had a thing for any particular type… except hot.

I smiled again – noticing Cailin's shocked expression – and said goodbye before walking back across the street.

Outside the shop I unzipped my coveralls enough to get my arms back in before zipping back up. The girls were still across the street, facing each other though they both kept glancing at me.

"Hope to see you tonight!" I called before getting back to work.

I texted Gabe our plans for the night when I got off work then went up to shower and get ready. When I was dressed I checked my phone to see a text from Gabe saying he'd meet me at home just as he walked in the door.

"Hey," we greeted at the same time.

I put my shoes on and we took off, catching a cab. There's a lot of reasons Gabe is an awesome wing man but one of my favorites had to be that he never asked if the chick I'd found for him was hot; he didn't have to – Gabe trusted me.

We were there pretty early but since I hadn't given the girls a time to meet us I didn't want to miss them. We found seats at the bar easily enough, ordered drinks, started a tab when they were ready and spun around on our stools to scope out the room.

We'd been there about half an hour when a Latin American beauty came and sat next to me with a shy smile.

"Wanna buy me a drink?" she asked nervously.

"I would love to," I told her honestly. "I'm meeting someone here later but would hate to be impolite."

She smiled and I waved the bartender over. I told him to add her drink to my tab.

"I'm Jake."

"Isabelle. Are you meeting your girlfriend here tonight, Jake?"

I shook my head. "Not my girlfriend. A girl I'm seeing though."

I heard Gabe's chuckle from behind me. He was always amused that I felt the need to be so honest with the women I met. He wouldn't have bought that my mother had raised a gentleman cause he knew my mother wouldn't be happy to know how many women came and went quickly through my life. The fact was that women seemed to like it. They knew where they stood with me, what they were getting into and, for the most part, were okay with it.

I think it might be something I'd learned from Bella actually. At the time I'd really felt like she was sending me mixed signals and leading me on but when I look back I think she did her best to make it clear to me that she just wanted to be friends. I'd bet Bella would laugh to know all that I'd learned from my teenage heartbreak.

I focused back on Isabelle – ha! – who was thanking me for the drink and hoping she'd see me around sometime.

"I'd like that," I agreed. And I would; she was beautiful. But I'd made a commitment – albeit a tiny and subtle one – to Cailin and I never had something going on with more than one woman at a time – except that one time and they were both into that.

As I watched her walk away I saw Lori and Cailin walk in. I tapped Gabe and gestured toward them. "Dark and light blue dresses."

"Which one is mine?" he asked.

"The brunette. Lori."

Poor Lori. I _had_ led her on a little. I think I'd sort of given her the impression she'd be hooking up with Gabe tonight and there wasn't much chance of that. He'd sort of given up on one night stands and liked to get to know girls before he slept with them. He said the sex was better, more intimate, when you knew the girl first. I suppose between the two of them Lori had the better odds of long-term happiness though.

Not that I wasn't willing to try and get to know Cailin. But I wasn't gonna wait to sleep with her. And I wasn't gonna give her my heart any time soon.

"Really?" Gabe asked, a little surprised.

"Yea. Why?" I watched the girls start to wander the club but made no move to approach them.

"She's hotter. And, you know, brunette."

I smiled at him. "It's always nice when we disagree."

"Guess so," he chuckled.

The girls had spotted me and were almost to us. When they'd closed the distance I pouted at Lori. "No friend for me?"

"Oh, shut up," Cailin laughed and sat down in my lap.

I grinned at her then Lori as I introduced her to Gabe.

We ordered drinks for the girls and started chatting, getting to know them and it became clear that they'd begun drinking before they got to the club. It wasn't long before the girls were whining about dancing – which Gabe and I both normally try to avoid. We obliged them for the sake of getting laid.

Cailin was shamelessly grinding her ass against me and I was hard as fuck. I turned her around and leaned down to kiss her. Her tongue was trying to get in my mouth as soon as our lips connected and she pressed herself against me. I broke away and moved to her ear, nibbling on the soft part as I growled softly, "Go tell your friend you're leaving with me now."

She smirked at me and then gave me one more scorching kiss before doing as I'd told her to. "Meet you outside," I called to her.

I hailed a cab and waited with it for a minute until Cailin came out. I helped her climb in and then got in after her.

"Your place," she said before I could ask.

With a smile I gave the driver my address. We made out again in the car so I paid the driver well when he stopped in front of Pete's Auto Body.

I climbed out and then held my hand out for Cailin. She took it and I used it to pull her behind in the building, up the stairs and into my apartment.

As soon as I closed the door behind us she was on me again. She jumped me so she could reach my mouth. I caught her and our tongues battled for dominance.

With her legs wrapped around me I carried her over to my bed where I tried to set her down but she didn't let me go. I chuckled cockily into her mouth, remembering how she thought she'd been hard to get.

She pulled back finally and dropped her legs from around me, standing on my bed. "Get naked, Jake." She was already taking her dress off before I obeyed.

We stood looking at each other naked for a minute, her on the bed, me on the floor. She leaned over and licked me from my stomach to my chest before wrapping her legs around me again. I held her to me by her bare ass.

Cailin kissed my neck and licked her way up to my ear with her hands in my hair. She wriggled her hips, trying to align us so that I'd slide into her. I didn't let her; I didn't have a condom on yet.

"I wanna fuck like this, Jake," she moaned in my ear. "I've never been with a guy who could do it." She licked along the shell of my ear. "Can you, Jake? Can you do it for me?"

"Condom," I answered and pried her off me. With a whine she finally let me set her down. I grabbed a condom from the drawer and put it on quickly. I pulled Cailin to me by her waist until she put her legs around me once again.

This time when she tried to get me inside her, I helped.

"Ung," I groaned.

"Oh, god," she cried out.

Once I was fully inside her I lifted her ass up and then let her slide back down on me again.

"You want it just like that?" I grunted as I repeated the action. "Or did you want me to pound you into a wall?"

"_Fuck_, Jake. Both. You feel so good. I want both."

"Greedy girl," I chuckled and kept moving her up and down with one hand on her ass. The other grabbed her tit. They were huge – fake, but huge – and I couldn't resist touching them any longer.

Cailin was panting my name heavily before her held fell back and I felt her come around me. "One," she whispered as she brought her head back up smiling.

We kissed again as I moved us to the nearest wall, still gliding her up and down over my cock.

I pressed her firmly against the wall, holding her up with only my hands on both tits and my hips as I thrust in and out roughly. I brought one hand down and rubbed her clit.

She came again almost immediately. She tried to throw her head back again and slammed it into the wall. I laughed at her but it died quickly at the sensation of her milking my cock.

"Two," she breathed.

I slowed down the pounding, not ready to finish yet. "Any other fantasies you need me for?" I asked cockily.

"I think you can wing it from here, Jake. Just don't fucking stop."

"Good," I grunted and moved my hands around behind me to grab her feet. I pulled them off of me and bent her knees till they were up against the wall on either side of her.

I pounded into her hard and she came again, remembering to keep her head level this time.

At her whispered, "Three," I dropped her feet and grabbed her ass so I could move us again.

I backed up a few steps and then lowered us to the floor, folding my legs under me so that I was kneeling on my haunches with Cailin on top of me, one leg on either side. I lost my rhythm doing it but that helped me keep from going over the edge.

She put her feet flat on the ground and I used my hands on her hips to help guide her up and down on me. I bent forward and licked her nipple, then across her chest to the other one.

"I'm close," I told her when I felt my orgasm approaching; I wasn't gonna push it off again.

"Gimme one more," she panted and thrust herself harder up and down.

I fondled her clit again and she screamed, coming again.

I lifted her up and down four more times – she'd stopped helping when her orgasm hit – and then came hard.

"Fuck, yes," I grunted, moving her over me slowly until I was finished coming.

I pulled her all the way off as soon as I was done and she stood up. She flopped down on the bed as I went into the kitchen to pull the condom off. I threw it in the trash, grabbed two bottles of water from the fridge and brought one back to Cailin.

"Thank you," she smiled weakly as she took it, looking exhausted and not sitting up. "I've never been happier to lose a bet."

"What bet?" I asked and sat on the edge of the bed near where her feet were hanging over.

"I made a bet with Lori about how many times you could make me come."

"Well, shit," I complained. "If I had known-"

Cailin laughed. "My twenty bucks was on two, Jacob. Two or less would have been a win for me. Three and over went to Lori."

"Glad I could do something for her, too." I smiled and took another sip of my water.

"God, I can't even make fun of you for being cocky anymore. You've earned it."

"S'alright. You can still make fun; I can take it."

With a laugh she finally sat up and opened her water to take a sip. "So, is this when you tell me you have to work early in the morning or some shit?"

"I'm not an asshole, Cailin," I said, offended. "That was fun and I'd like to do it again, if you would. And if you wanna sleep here so we can do that again tonight or in the morning that sounds good to me. Don't expect a gourmet breakfast or anything though."

"Oh, yea?" she asked, chuckling. "Are we gonna, like, date now or something?"

"Why not?" I countered. "I'm not asking you to be my girlfriend, Cailin. I'm just saying we could go out again. Fuck again. If you want to."

She looked at me, like she was trying to figure out if I was serious. Why would I lie about that shit?

"I guess I'd have to be an idiot to turn that down."

I nodded. "Yes, you would be."

I took her water bottle from her hand and set both bottles down before leaning in to kiss her again.

The smart ones were the best.

**A/N: Chapter 7 as soon as my husband can beta it (which will be probably be tonight if he gets his computer fixed like he hopes to).**


	8. Part 2 Chapter 7

**A/N: This section of the story works SO much better from the other POV. Jake's POV will be back as soon as it fits. Thanks again for my husband for betaing. **

I climbed out of the Mercedes and pulled the door down. I glanced around and smiled at those who'd turned to look at my car. _Ostentatious_, Edward had said – like that was a _bad_ thing. But he'd given me the car anyway; Daddy gave me everything I wanted.

After I smiled, the onlookers turned away; people don't like to be caught staring.

Except _him_ apparently. Not that I minded him staring. He was absolutely magnificent. His soft jet black hair hung just into his soul-filled murky brown eyes. His skin was auburn in color and looked positively lickable. He was _huge_ in _all_ the right ways. He was close to 7' tall and he looked stronger than Emmett – though no human actually could be, of course.

Hercules, if I had to give a one-word description.

And now _I'd _been staring. I smiled at him, inviting him to talk to me.

He knew my smile for the invitation it was – how could he not? How many similar smiles had this man received? Dozens? Hundreds?

He strode to me quickly and confidently, walking away from the girl I only now noticed he was standing next to without a word to her.

"Hi," I said, hoping I sounded casual; I didn't _feel_ casual. My stomach felt as though it was doing summersaults. Was this what "butterflies" felt like?

"Hi. I'm Jake." The deep husky sound of his voice alone sent shivers through my body. Did one human deserve so many perfect features?

"Renesmee," I replied mechanically, hearing my own voice from a distance.

It had been a moment since he'd spoken and the sound of his voice was distant enough that I had time to process his words. _Jake_, he'd said. There had only ever been one Jake in my life and I'd never even met him.

He'd been my mother's best friend before she married my father. Jacob Black had been in love with her – and he was a werewolf, mortal enemy of human-eating vampires – and unable to accept the life Bella had chosen. He was Quiluete and Bella had described him with black hair, brown eyes, russet skin…

These thoughts went through me in less than a heartbeat.

"Jake?" I asked. _Impossible_.

I took a deep breath in through my nose. _Werewolf_.

I knew what the next words from his mouth would be before his lips had parted.

"Jacob. Jacob Black," he confirmed with a nod.

I couldn't move. I couldn't speak. I couldn't even breathe.

I'd known my mother's friend was still alive of course. Not only was he a werewolf and capable of living forever without aging – like myself, my family, and all werewolves who didn't give up phasing – but he'd continued to send my mother postcards. When had the last one come? Six months? Eight? And he'd still been in San Francisco then. I remembered precisely seeing the smile on Bella's face as she'd read, remembered reading it myself, but I couldn't put a date to the memory.

_Sort of beautiful_ Bella had told me she'd awkwardly complimented him. The spectacular man in front of me was _so_ much more than that.

Bella would want to know I'd seen him. So would Billy, Charlie, Seth and the rest of the pack, of course. Even Edward would want to know.

And Jacob would _not_ want that, I knew. If he'd ever wanted to be found or reached he'd have reached out to someone himself.

The moment I thought it, I felt my allegiance shift. I would keep Jacob from them. This moment – and any others I dared to hope for – would be mine alone.

"Renesmee Masen," I lied with a smile after only a slightly too-long pause.

I was sure that Jake would turn around, walk away, and never look back if I uttered Edward's last name. Whether he would figure out who I was or not, he wouldn't hesitate to run from the name _Cullen_.

I did _not_ want him to leave.

"Nice to meet you." After he spoke he winced, as though he was embarrassed by his word choice.

I gave him a sincere smile and replied, "Very nice to meet you too." I put my hand gently on his forearm, hoping to ensure him he had no need to be embarrassed.

His eyes landed on where our skin touched and his eyes blazed. Could he feel the same flash of heat that I did? Heat that had nothing to do with his high werewolf temperature.

His eyes slid back to mine. "Renesmee." He said my name as though I was his goddess, and I felt my knees weaken.

The girl he'd been with before approached us then, and I dropped my hand.

"Did you find someone you know, Jake?" she asked awkwardly.

"Something like that," he muttered, too quietly for the girl to hear. Louder he said, "Renesmee, this is Candy." I smiled that he'd introduced _her_ to _me _but not _me_ to _her._

I turned to her, willing to trade my own beloved power for that of Jane's to put her in agony with just a glance. "Hi."

The look in her eyes told me she wished the same. "Hi. How do you know Jake?"

Should I lie for him? If I told the truth this girl would be angry at him – perhaps enough to leave. If I lied then Jacob could keep up appearances with Candy; did I want that – if it made him happy?

Jacob spoke before I came to a decision. "Renesmee and I have a date tomorrow."

Instead of making him seem cocky – setting a date without asking me first – his confidence only made him more appealing, which I wouldn't have thought possible just a moment ago. Not to mention how pleased I was that I now had a _date_ with him. And that he'd not been afraid to tell the girl. If they were dating – I couldn't be sure since she seemed so possessive of him but he seemed to care so little for her – Jake obviously didn't care to hide his interest in me from her.

"Oh," Candy sighed dejectedly.

Jake seemed to take my silence as acceptance – which it most certainly was.

"We're meeting at Haight and Ashbury, right? At six?" He smiled at me again and then winked.

I felt my own smile spread across my face. "Yes," I confirmed in a breathy voice that I barely recognized as my own.

His smile grew impossibly wider.

"Well, Renesmee gets you tomorrow, but _I_ get you _today_." Candy pulled roughly on his arm.

I tried to cover a chuckle as I watched Candy try to move a werewolf who didn't want to move. Even I couldn't do that.

Though I _could_ remove Candy's arms from her body if she didn't stop using them to try and pull Jake away from me.

It looked difficult for him but Jacob's eyes left my face and turned to look down at Candy.

He laughed at her effort but then seemed to feel bad for her. "Sure, sure."

His eyes met mine again. "I'm looking forward to tomorrow, Renesmee."

I fought the urge to ask him to say my name again – the sound of it was _divine_ from his lips. "So am I," I told him honestly.

"Bye, Renesmee." Thank _god_, he'd said it again.

"See you tomorrow, Jacob Black." I couldn't bring myself to say "goodbye."

He gave me one more glorious smile before letting Candy drag him away.

I stood there, watching them walk away, with a million thoughts running through my head.

Jacob glanced back at me several times, and I still couldn't bring myself to look away.

When he and Candy reached a black Ducati Streetfighter S they stopped. I thought of how perfectly the bike suited him as Jake handed Candy a helmet before putting his own on.

Jake looked back toward me one more time as he started the bike, Candy's arms wrapped possessively around him. When he caught my eye he grinned.

I returned his smile and lifted my hand to wiggle my fingers in a small wave.

He shook his head at that, though I could tell he was laughing. I wished then that my hearing was good enough to cover such a distance in a busy parking lot.

I would just have to make him laugh again. Tomorrow. On our date. Another smile spread across my face at the thought.

And then Jake was out of sight.

When I got home that night, I was still in a euphoric mood.

Seth and Beth were cuddled on the couch watching a movie when I walked in.

Both of them knew me too well for me to keep my joy a secret from them – and I didn't really want to. Keeping details from them would be easy enough; I had my father's ability to lie well.

"Hey, Ren," Seth greeted me first.

"Hi guys," I sighed.

Beth sat up, scooting away from Seth. "What's with you?" She said it in a tone that meant she knew this was going to be girl talk.

"Oh, God," Seth sighed, paused the movie and stood up. "I'll go pick up dinner." He leaned down and gave Beth a kiss. "Love you."

"Love you too." Beth smiled up at him.

I grabbed a soda and came to sit next to Beth as Seth walked out the door.

"Go ahead." Beth turned to sit sideways on the couch so she could face me.

"It's just a guy," I tried.

"Yea, they all are. Eventually. But right now he's _so_ much more. He's hot gossip, the new dish, the next Renesmee scandal waiting to happen."

I laughed. "He's more than _that_."

"Then dish!" she complained.

"What is there to say?" I was enjoying making Beth drag any details out of me – as I always did.

"Name," Beth demanded.

"Jake." There are plenty of Jake's in the world. Who would guess it could possibly be _that_ Jake?

"What's he look like?"

This was a little trickier. "Tall, dark and handsome," I sighed, purposefully vague.

"Aren't they all?" Beth laughed.

"They're not all tall. And they're not all dark," I disagreed.

"Every one you find is certainly handsome though."

"Why would I go out with one who wasn't?"

Beth laughed. "I suppose if I were you, I would have looked over all the frogs too."

"Seth is _not_ a frog."

"No, he's not," she agreed quickly. "But I kissed a frog or two before I met him."

I laughed. "And look what a waste of your time that wound up being!"

"When are you going out?" Beth could only be distracted from her goal of _details_ for so long.

"Tomorrow night. We're meeting in the city at Haight and Ashbury."

"Meeting?" she asked, a little disappointed. "What kind of guy can't pick you up so I can meet him?"

I was laughing again but more at the thought of what she would say if she met him and realized who he was than at her shock that he wouldn't be picking me up.

"The kind of guy who was on a date when we met. He pretended that we already knew each other and had plans when his date walked up."

"Renesmee Cullen!" Beth _was_ shocked this time.

I just smiled.

She waited for me to explain for a minute before moving on with the questions. "Was he really that great?"

"You have _no _idea." I sighed at the memory of Jacob. "He's all muscle and cock-sure and soulful brown eyes and swagger and Ducati and on a date with _Candy_ and telling her that he's got a date with me without asking me and confident without cocky and carefree smiles and couldn't take his eyes off me and H.O.T."

"Wow," Beth sighed.

The sound of her voice brought me out of my daydream.

"What are you 'wowing' about?" I pushed on her shoulder lightly.

"Two things. One, he sounds like _wow_. And two, _you_ sound _in love_." She dragged the word "love" into three or four syllables.

"One," I replied, a harsh edge to my voice, "_Seth_ is wow, too. Two, _imprinting_ is the closest the real world has to love at first sight and I'm not a wolf; I can't do that."

Suddenly, irrationally and incomprehensibly I considered the idea of Jacob imprinting on someone.

It had happened to me before. Seth and I were dating when he came to visit me at college, and the minute he laid eyes on my new roommate and best friend, Beth, we were through. I hadn't _really _been hurt. I'd known all about imprinting for as long as I could remember. And Seth and I had talked about it before we started dating.

But it had stung a little. Things had gone from "Seth and Beth, my boyfriend and my best friend" to "Seth and Beth, together forever."

I'd never tried to stand in their way and had even pushed Beth into giving Seth a chance rather than worrying about me.

We were all well and truly past it now.

Seth had been my first boyfriend and first lover. Still the only one, really. Guys didn't tend to hold my interest very long and it had really only been a few months since Seth and I broke up.

But somehow, the thought of Jacob Black imprinting on some girl while we were on our date tomorrow had me fuming.

"-_lust_, right?" Beth had been speaking and I only caught those last two words.

"Huh?" I asked, still trying to bring my mind back to focus on her.

Beth laughed. "God, I've gotta see this guy who's got you so wrapped up in him already."

Beth picked up my hand and held it to her face, waiting for me to use my ability to show him to her.

I debated quickly whether or not I should do it. Being Seth's imprint meant that Beth knew about everything; she'd heard the legend of Jacob Black. Would just the sight of him be enough for her to figure it out? What would she do if she knew? She'd tell Seth, for sure, and he'd have to tell the pack. And they might get word to my family. More than the fear of them all finding out that I'd seen him was the fear of everyone finding out that I _wanted_ him – wanted Jacob Black, my mother's sort of ex-boyfriend. On the other hand, if I didn't show her she'd grow suspicious and who knew what she'd imagine then.

Seth came back in then and I jumped up and yelled, "Thank God, I'm hungry!"

Beth stood up to kiss Seth, and I hoped she wouldn't bring it up again.

At least let me get this _one _date with him.


	9. Chapter 8

**A/N: Again, apologies to any Candies who may be reading… including Candaces who won't let people call them Candy!**

**There are pictures of the Metreon (where Jake met Renesmee), Renesmee's car and Jacob's motorcycle here: ****http://s582(dot)photobucket(dot)com/albums/ss266/jkane180/**** .**

**THANK YOU to every who's been reviewing! Some of you didn't like that Jake wound up imprinting on Nessie after finally getting away from all things Bella. I just wouldn't be able to buy him imprinting on someone else… I just don't think it could work that way. Also, for me, the point of this story is to bring Jake full-circle and wring him clean of all the abuse inflicted upon him – Bella's daughter plays an essential role in that. And those of you that were glad to see her, YAY!**

**I made another collage for this chapter: ****http://www(dot)polyvore(dot)com/chapter/set?id=15932120**

**Finally, thanks to my husband for betaing!**

The next day dragged on, and I could barely focus on my classes. At least Beth hadn't asked for any more details about Jake. I just had to finish this one class before I could go home to get ready and then drive back up to the city. My thoughts were scattered but held one focal point: Jacob Black.

How many times had I been in San Francisco since I'd arrived at Stanford? Nine. It took _nine_ times of being in the same city as Jacob before I met him.

Did he see my parents in me? Is that what had drawn him to me? Bella's eyes in my face?

He didn't know I had ever been born, of course. My existence should have been impossible, and he'd never let anyone from back home get in touch with him. But did he see it anyway? Subconsciously?

I hated to think that he'd only been attracted to my resemblance to Bella. More of Edward showed in my face than Bella – surely it would have been a turn-off for him if he were seeing my parents instead of me.

How long could I lie to him about who I was? Lie – by omission – to my friends and family about knowing Jake? Even if all the lies were easy to keep up, how long would Jake want to see me for?

Obviously he wasn't serious about Candy – what a _stupid_ name anyway. Had Jake grown into a love 'em and leave 'em, one-night stand kind of guy?

Did I care?

Yes, I cared. Too much. I had barely met Jacob, but I knew I wanted a lot more than one night with him.

I'd have to play hard to get then. That would be considerably more difficult after the way we'd met and planned our first date.

Not to mention how difficult it would be to resist finding out how the real Jake compared to the Jake that had starred in my dreams last night.

_Finally_, class was dismissed and I hurried home.

I'd already spent a good deal of time thinking about what to wear, but I would need to try several things on before any decision could be made.

After my shower, I tried on a backless sequined top with very low-rise jeans. Too clubbin'.

I put on a form-fitting sweater and a pair of broken in jeans. Too casual.

Black leather mini-skirt and tight red sleeveless top. Too cheap.

Comfortable jeans and t-shirt. Too Bella.

Fitted leather pants and dark grey wrap shirt. Perfect.

I came out of my room and spun in a slow circle for Seth and Beth who were cuddled on the couch again.

"Very you. Hot, but not easy," Beth confirmed.

Seth only nodded. He was always worried that if any ghost of the feelings he'd had for me showed that I'd be hurt and wind up as bitter and lonely as Leah had been for so long. He was wrong, of course, but I could understand how seeing his sister live through something so hard for her would have this kind of effect on him.

I left earlier than I needed to. I was worried about traffic and parking; if I was late, would Jake think I had stood him up?

It was only 5:30 when I first drove by the corner where we were to meet, but Jake was already waiting, watching me approach.

I double parked and rolled the window down.

"Wanna jump in while I look for parking?" I asked with a smile.

Jacob closed the distance with a smile, and I unlocked his door.

"I was worried you wouldn't come," he admitted as he climbed in.

"Nothing could have kept me away," I replied without thinking.

I shouldn't have worried about scaring him away; with an easy smile he reached over and took my hand.

"So, how's Candy?" I teased as I drove around slowly, looking for a space or a lot.

Jake burst into laughter which reminded me of how much I'd wanted to hear it yesterday. It was even better than I had imagined and brought a big smile to my face.

"Renesmee, I didn't think I'd have to tell you that I would have left her standing alone in that parking lot if I had dared to hope you would have left with me." His tone was light but I knew he meant it.

"You should have dared," I said quietly.

Jacob's hand squeezed mine tighter and I glanced at him. He was staring at me with such intensity that I felt myself blush.

"So I guess she's not your i-" I barely stopped myself from saying "imprint." I quickly corrected myself and hoped desperately that I hadn't just ruined everything. "Your true love?"

An odd look crossed his face, and I felt my hopes come crashing down. It passed quickly though, and he said with a smile, "Not even close."

I smiled back at him and pulled into a lot that had vacancies.

With a sigh, he decided to give me all the details. "It was our second date and I already knew there wouldn't be a third before I saw you."

I felt my smile widen as I parked the car.

I turned to face him, and I don't know what I would have said because he didn't give me time to think of anything.

He leaned over and pressed his lips to mine. It was gentle and would have been chaste but for how long his lips remained hotly against mine.

I felt him smile against me before he backed away.

"I'm sorry. That was a little forward of me," he murmured.

If I was going to play hard to get I would have to make some complaint here. "I like forward," I heard myself reply. Shit.

He smiled and its brilliance made the day a little brighter. He let go of my hand and climbed out of the car.

I allowed myself a happy sigh after his door closed before I opened my own.

My door opened just as I reached for the handle.

I tried to stop the laugh that was bubbling up but lost the battle. I imagined Bella and Edward seeing Jake open my door for me and then offer me his hand as I climbed out, and I shared the laugh they would have had with them.

I was immediately sorry when I looked up to see the hurt on Jake's face. My laughter died in an instant.

I reached up and touched his face, trying to bring the smile back. "Jake, that was really sweet. It was just so unexpected."

The hurt on his face lessened but didn't disappear, so I explained further – _needing_ his smile again. "Chivalry isn't dead but it's damn hard to find in anyone our age. And I certainly didn't see it coming from the Streetfighter-riding, _Candy_-dating guy who asked me out while on a date with someone else."

His face lit up again. I thought I'd convinced him, but I should have realized it was something else I'd said.

"I figured any girl driving an SLR McLaren Roadster would know something about cars, but you know bikes too?"

"Yes," I chuckled.

Still smiling, he took my hand and began to lead me out of the garage. "What's the catch then?" he asked.

"Catch?"

He looked down at me as we walked. "Hideous feet?"

Ah, the catch. He wanted to know what would be wrong with me. So far, he thought I was perfect, but since no one is, he wanted to know what my flaw was.

"Nope. They're tiny little things with cute, manicured toes," I answered.

Jake couldn't possibly guess nature of the bomb hanging over our heads. When… if… _when_ he found out who my parents were and what I was, that would be more than enough of a flaw to send him running.

"Thousands of dollars of gambling debt?"

"No gambling addiction and a wealthy family."

"Thirty-five cats?"

"Two roommates, no pets."

"Jealous boyfriend?"

I laughed. "_I'm_ not that type."

Jake's face clouded over for a minute before he was laughing too. "Are you implying I might have a jealous boyfriend?"

"I'll sick him on Candy if you do." I was laughing harder.

Jacob used my hand in his to pull me to a stop and spun me to face him. "Seriously, Renesmee. I don't belong to Candy or anybody else."

"I believe you," I said easily. My heart stuttered as I realized that Jake was making it clear that he wouldn't belong to _me_ either. I wanted to add something to let him know that I wasn't trying to tame him; I would take whatever I could get from Jacob Black.

Jake spoke before I could. "I'm not opposed to the idea. I just haven't met anyone worth it in a while."

To lighten the conversation back up I crinkled my nose up. "Lots of girls with ugly feet?"

Jake's booming laugh brought my smile back. "You have _no idea_."

"I'm sorry I wore my boots then. You'd love me in something cute and strappy."

Jacob's eyes slowly left my face and traveled down my body to my feet before coming back up just as slowly. "I love what you're in." He paused, eyes all over me again. "Though I'm sure I'd love cute and strappy too."

I smiled at him and then pulled on his hand to get us walking again.

"You're not underage are you?" Jake was smiling but sounded a little concerned.

I had to laugh again and wonder what could have made him ask that. Technically, I was only eight though I looked about 25. "21," I replied. I'd insisted on having an ID that would get me into any club when I moved out here even though I was only a freshman at Stanford.

"Drug addict?"

"Nope."

"Refuse to listen to anything other than the Jonas Brothers?"

"No," I laughed.

"STD?" Jacob winced.

I reached across myself to playfully punch him in the arm. "No, Jacob Black. And I think that ends your right to ask questions about what might be wrong with me."

"That's alright. I think I got all the worst ones out the way."

"Ha ha! My bank robbing secret is safe!" I teased.

Jacob scoffed and replied, "That's hardly a flaw. You can help me pay off the Ducati."

We smiled at each other, and Jake began to swing our arms as we walked.

"And what about you?" I asked. "What's your big secret that's bound to scare me off?" I tried to keep the self-satisfaction out of my voice; I was pretty sure I already knew his biggest secret.

Jake was quick to cover his initial reaction but I knew he'd thought of the same thing I had – his wolf. He stopped walking again and leaned down to whisper in my ear. "I'm a werewolf."

I froze. He couldn't just _tell_ people that! He couldn't possibly know that I knew. Shouldn't Sam's order not to tell anyone still prevent him from telling people?

His face lit up in a smile and he chuckled. He was trying to make a joke of it. But he should still be physically unable to make his lips form around the words, shouldn't he?

"Relax, Renesmee," Jake chuckled. I couldn't help but notice that he hadn't added the "It was just a joke" that would be customary.

I tried to relax – tried to pretend I didn't know that he'd actually just told me the truth.

"I'm not afraid of the big bad wolf," I said with attitude. "I just thought I'd have to drag your secret out of you."

Unexpectedly Jacob leaned down and kissed me again. Still gentle, soft and _hot_ but less chaste than before. Again I felt his lips spread into a smile just before he pulled back.

"I'll tell you anything you want to know," he said lightly as we started walking again.

What did I want to know? I knew far more about him than I would let on. Not much about the last eight years though. That's where I put my focus.

"Are you in school? Do you work?"

"I dropped out of high school at 16 and never went to college. I work at Pete's Auto Body here in the city."

"And you live in the city?"

"Yeah, in an apartment above the shop – been there since just a few days after I moved to the city."

"What do you usually do with your time off?"

Jacob was swinging our hands again as we walked. "What everyone does, I guess. Hang out with friends, go to clubs, bars, date."

"What're your friends like?"

"They're kind of a wild bunch. Pete lives in the apartment across from mine and works in the shop so I see the most of her and her boyfriend, Shawn. April, Lexi, and Gabe are over just about every night after we go out though. You'll meet them."

I ignored the soaring of my heart that went along with getting to meet his friends. "Pete of Pete's Auto Body?"

"The very one, though she doesn't own the shop. Her uncle Stacey does, but he thought Pete's name worked better."

I realized then how thorough Jacob's answers had been. He'd given more than I'd asked every time. Surely he couldn't be this forthcoming with every girl he met, could he?

"Are you hungry?" he asked, stopping us again.

"Yeah." I looked around to not only see that we were in front of a restaurant but that it was dark out. When had it gotten dark? How long had we been just walking, talking and enjoying each other's company?

Jake pulled me into the restaurant and spoke to the hostess.

We were taken to a small table near the back of the restaurant.

As we sat, the hostess tried to get enough of Jake's attention to flash him a smile; she was unsuccessful. Jacob only looked at me, a satisfied smile on his face.

I couldn't resist another jab at Jake for the way we'd met – I doubted I would get sick of teasing him over it for a _very_ long time… if I was allowed to know him that long.

"The hostess thinks you're hot if you want to go set something up for tomorrow with her," I teased.

Jake didn't even look at her before replying to me. "I'm going out with you again tomorrow."

"Are you?" I asked skeptically.

He gave me a smile that I knew any woman would find it hard to say "no" to and nodded.

I blushed when I couldn't even come up with a sarcastic remark, let alone a rebuttal.

I looked at my menu and decided what to eat while trying to come up with something witty to say.

"If I had work or class? Or a date?" I asked finally.

"You could call in sick to work or class." He paused and waited till I looked up at him before going on. "And you'd cancel a date with some other guy to go out with me."

"Sure of yourself, aren't you?" I teased, not denying the truth of what he'd said.

He shrugged. "Sure of you."

I felt my heart speed up and was grateful when the waiter came to take our order.

After the waiter left, Jacob said, "Now that you mention it, I was so busy trying to find out what was wrong with you that I didn't ask all the normal questions."

"Maybe you'll find an answer to both at once," I helped.

He laughed. "Doubt it," he mumbled. "What do you do with your days?" he asked louder.

"I'm a freshman at Stanford."

"Your major?"

"I'm pre-law."

"A lawyer-to-be, huh?" He raised his eyebrows.

"That's me," I smiled.

"Do you work?"

"No. Wealthy family, remember?"

"I remember. What do you do with your nights?" His voice grew just the slightest bit huskier.

"What everyone does, I guess. Hang out with friends, go to clubs, bars, date." I grinned at him, using his words from earlier.

"What're your friends like?" He grinned back at me, using _my_ words from earlier.

"I spend most of my time with my roommates Beth and Seth. I suppose I'm kind of a third wheel a lot of the time. But they wouldn't have met if it weren't for me, so they aren't allowed to complain. I have a lot of other friends at school but none that I could call in an emergency, you know?"

"What do Beth and Seth major in?"

"Beth's pre-law, too. Seth's our bum; he's not in school. He's only even in California to be with Beth." I worried that he'd ask where Seth was from next; I shouldn't have said that.

"How'd you hook them up?"

"That's kind of complicated," I said slowly. Without mentioning imprinting Seth came off as an ass in this story. "Seth and I dated on and off before I moved out here." Not true – we'd been steady since the day we discovered each other's feelings, though most of our relationship had been long-distance. "He came out to visit me once and fell head-over-heels for Beth."

"Where're you guys from?"

"Hanover, New Hampshire." That was _mostly_ true. I'd been born in Forks – and Seth was from La Push – but that was information I couldn't give Jacob. My family had been living in Hanover for a while now so that Bella could go to Dartmouth. She had her degree now and they would probably need to move soon.

"Why'd you come all the way to California for school? Why not something closer to home like Harvard or Yale?"

I burst into laughter. "That's the argument my parents made. And my answer is simple. _Because_ they're close to home." I paused before deciding to add the second part of my reason. "And the sun." The sun meant that even though my family would be relocating soon, they couldn't get _too_ close. I didn't add that, at the time, I'd been happy that to shorten the distance between me and Seth.

"I suppose you're not the first college student to choose a school far from home," Jake chuckled.

"I _know_ I'm not."

"And why didn't you go to college right out of high school?"

Ah, a tricky question but I had a frequently used answer for it. "I spent three years in Europe." I _had_ been to Europe but for something more like three months.

The waiter brought our food, and we both started eating immediately.

"You certainly eat like a werewolf," I laughed when Jacob finished his food before I was even half done.

He chuckled and didn't seem to think my comment unusual.

Jacob waited patiently, watching me eat. It probably would have made a normal girl nervous, but as the only member of my family who needed to eat, I was used to it.

The waiter put the check down just as I was finishing. Jacob and I reached for it at the same time.

"What do you think you're doing?" Jake laughed.

"Did you forget the wealthy family again?"

Jacob shook his head. "I can't let you."

"If you knew my parents, you'd have no problem spending their money," I laughed.

"Maybe another time," Jake allowed. "This is our first date and there is _no way_ you are paying – wealthy parents or no."

I surrendered with a shrug and a smile.

When we were outside, Jacob took my hand again, lacing his fingers through mine.

"Do you have a coat in your car?" he asked.

"I'm not cold," I told him honestly.

"You'll get cold soon if we keep walking around."

"I don't get cold easily." Another true answer.

A smile spread slowly across Jake's face. "I won't insist on the coat then." He let go of my hand and wrapped his arm around my shoulders.

If he was waiting for a complaint, he was going to be waiting a _long_ time.

We walked for a long time that way, learning more about each other – favorite movies, books and music, hobbies, schedules and that kind of thing.

I wasn't even aware we were headed back toward the car until Jake led us onto the lot.

"Can I see you tomorrow, Renesmee?" Jacob asked quietly, looking down at me.

"Didn't you already tell me that you were?" I chuckled.

"Are you going to do anything I tell you to do?" His voice was a bit huskier than usual.

"Only the things I want to," I breathed.

We came up to my car and stopped. Jake let his arm slide off of my shoulders, down my arm, and picked up my hand in his.

"Kiss me," he whispered.

I smiled and stood up on the tips of my toes to reach him even as he bent down to meet me.

Our lips touched softly again. This time the fire between us grew before Jake pulled away. Our mouths were moving together, and I felt his tongue slide along my lower lip. I opened my lips to him, and my body quivered as our tongues slid against each other.

My hands slipped around his neck and into the hair at the back of his neck at the same moment that Jake's hands settled on my waist.

I pulled back slightly, trying to get air. "Jacob," I sighed.

His mouth moved to the edge of my jaw and then down to my neck.

We both started when the headlights on the car next to mine came on and it beeped softly.

Jake pulled his head up to glare at our interruption.

"Sorry," the car's owner half mumbled and half chuckled as he climbed into his car.

Jacob returned his eyes to mine as he held me but didn't bring his mouth back to mine. "Can I pick you up tomorrow?"

"Palo Alto isn't very exciting," I warned him.

"What did we do tonight that we couldn't have done in Palo Alto? The walking or the eating?" Jake chuckled.

"Yes, please pick me up tomorrow," I smiled. "I have paper and a pen in the glove box." I went and got them, jotting down my address, home phone number and cell number. "Don't lose that," I said as I handed it to him.

He laughed quietly and shook his head. "Never." He tucked it into his pocket and wrapped his arms around me again. "When are you out of class tomorrow?"

"4:45."

"So I'll see you at 5?"

"Don't you work tomorrow?" I ran my fingers through his hair.

"I haven't taken a sick day in the five years I've been there. I think Stacey'll let me go early tomorrow." Jake smiled at me and leaned toward me again.

I stretched up to meet him, and we kissed again. Lips and tongue and soft and wet but short – too short before he was smiling against me and pulling away.

"Go get some sleep. I'll see you tomorrow." Jake pressed his lips briefly to mine once more.

"Tomorrow," I drawled with a lazy, happy smile on my face.

Jacob turned to walk away and I watched him go, leaning against the trunk of my Roadster. He glanced back a time or two with a grin on his face and I smiled at him.

He turned around one more time before turning the corner outside the garage and I blew him a kiss. I could just barely hear his smug chuckle before he was gone.


	10. Chapter 9

**A/N: Thanks to hubs for beta and reviewers for reviews!**

**First outfits: http://www(dot)polyvore(dot)com/cgi/set?id=15962474**

**Second outfits: http://www(dot)polyvore(dot)com/cgi/set?id=15962490**

By 4:42 the next day, I was glowering at the clock on the wall. I glanced down to check my outfit again – check for what, I don't know exactly – since there wouldn't be time to change after class before Jake would arrive, and I smiled. My flirty dress and strappy sandals were still intact. I looked up at the clock again and smiled at it briefly – 4:43! – before resuming my scowl.

I tried to lose myself in thoughts of Jacob again. It had worked to help me finally fall asleep last night. It had worked most of today to get me through class. It was too close now though. Right this minute, Jacob Black was driving to _my_ house, and I was stuck sitting here waiting for the clock to change.

4:44!

I was so lost in thought that I had missed the professor dismiss class a minute early; I didn't miss all my classmates gathering their things and leaving.

When I came around the corner and caught sight of my place, I nearly squealed in delight. Jake was already there, leaning against his bike parked right next to my car in the driveway. He smiled when our eyes met.

It took a lot of effort not to break into a run. Happily, Jacob stood and walked to meet me in the middle.

He wrapped his arms around me and crushed me to him. "I missed you, Renesmee," he murmured into my hair.

"I missed you." The smile on my face was apparent in my voice even though I was pressed into his chest.

Jake breathed a huge sigh that sounded almost relieved. He pulled on my backpack, taking it off my shoulder.

I took his hand and led him into the house, trying not to be disappointed that he hadn't kissed me right away. I was nervous that Jacob might recognize Seth's scent all over the apartment but there was no way I'd be able to talk him out of wanting to see where I lived. And the only way to find out was trial by fire.

He took several deep breaths as I showed him around the apartment but if he'd caught an out of the ordinary scent, he hadn't identified it.

Jacob set my backpack down in my room. "Seth and Beth?" he asked.

"Beth has a late class tonight and they always go to dinner before it."

Jake nodded. "Do you need to change or anything before we go?" As he spoke he looked me over and his voice got huskier with each word.

He closed the small distance between us and placed his hands on my bare upper arms. "Undeniably cute feet," he breathed before pressing his lips to mine.

I think Jacob meant to keep the kiss soft and gentle but I pushed for more and he gave it with a moan. As the kiss deepened and became more passionate, our tongues caressing each other, I jumped and wrapped my legs around his waist. His hands moved obligingly from my waist to my butt to hold me up. The back of the dress I wore hung down so his hands met the satin of my panties, making him grunt.

Jake pulled his mouth from mine for a breath, and I moved my lips to his ear, kissing, licking, sucking, and whispering his name.

"Oh, fuck," he groaned, and his hands gripped me harder.

I rocked my hips against him and breathed, "Let's." Evidently I'd thrown the 'hard to get' plan out the window.

Jake's mouth was back on mine, hard, fast, rough, hot and then I felt his smile spread and knew he was going to stop.

His grin was cocky, horny, and amused all at the same time. "No, Renesmee."

I felt a pout form on my face. "You don't want me?" I whispered.

"Renesmee, I want you more than I've ever wanted anything. That's why I'm asking you to stop now."

I pulled back wanting to get down. He understood and let me go. I took two steps backwards and smoothed my dress. "Better?" My voice sounded harsher than I meant it to.

"Yes." He closed the distance in one stride. "And no."

I sighed in frustration.

"Renesmee, I want you. Even more than that, I _don't_ want to say 'no' to you. I just don't want to rush this." Jake ran a hand through my hair.

I'd never been one to handle disappointment well; I'd never dealt with rejection – not counting Seth, which I didn't. Like a child, when pouting failed, I resorted to anger.

"Did you tell _Candy_ not to rush you?" I snapped.

Even under his tan skin I could see the blood rush into Jake's face. Hell, I'm half-vampire, I could _smell_ it.

"Don't you see that's exactly what I'm talking about?" He ran a hand through his own hair.

I placed my hands flat on his chest and tried to push no harder than a human could. He didn't move so I dropped my hands and took another few steps back. "You don't want me because of _Candy_?" I spat.

I saw Jake's face turn to anger and began to fear that all my precious lies wouldn't matter at all. But I was still too stung by his rejection to worry how badly I had blown it.

"Renesmee, I want to fuck you so hard you'll scream my name till your throat bleeds," he growled and then took a deep breath. "I would also like to get to know you first. To go on more than five dates with you. Meet your friends and have you meet mine. Have what's between us _mean_ something." He took another deep breath and I waited. "It's been _eight_ years since I felt anything even close to this. I obviously blew it back then. I have no idea what I'm doing, but I'm so afraid of messing this up."

Several things hit me all at once: Jake _really_ liked me (that was good news), he hadn't really cared for anyone since Bella (that was neither good nor bad or maybe both), and he had just compared how he felt about me with how he'd felt about _my mother _(that was really, really bad news).

I suddenly felt sick. I walked to the couch and sat down, hanging my head in my hands.

Jake misunderstood. How could he not when he had _no idea_ his first love was my mother?

"Renesmee, I'm sorry." He sat near me on the couch. "God, I'm screwing up, aren't I? I should _not_ be pouring my heart out to you on our second date." Jacob's voice was pained.

I decided to tell him everything then. I turned to look at him as I opened my mouth to speak.

And I couldn't do it. I still wanted him too much to let him – _make_ him – walk out of my life. I wanted him _all_ the ways he wanted me. It didn't matter to me that once upon a time before I was born Jake had loved Bella, kissed Bella. I knew that he was over her and had been for years. He still sent her postcards and I knew he still cared for her. But there was nothing wrong with that. I _lived_ with Seth and still counted him one of my best friends. We'd only been split up a few months _and_ our relationship had been more serious than Jake had been about Bella. In a world where werewolves, vampires, and half-vampires existed, it just couldn't matter if the perfect man for you had once thought your mother was the perfect girl for him.

Jake was still waiting for me to talk, clearly trying to read my face.

Making it easy for him, I smiled seductively. "Five dates?"

I saw Jacob relax and a smile spread across his face. "I said '_more_ than five.'"

"Jake, I'd like this to mean something too." I paused and couldn't help but smile with him; he looked so exultant. "Six dates," I added firmly.

His chuckle was deep and dark. "Count on it," he confirmed huskily.

"Let's go then." I stood up and took his hand.

"Are you gonna change first?"

It was my turn to chuckle. "I'm not gonna make it _easy_ for you, Jacob."

"What have I gotten myself into?" Jake muttered in a voice so soft a human wouldn't have heard it.

We set out walking from my house, found a restaurant when we were hungry and wandered home after. We walked and talked for hours that night, just as we had the night before. It was so easy to be around him. I wished I didn't have to keep so many secrets from him and could fully let my guard down. It was almost weird, getting to know someone I felt like I already knew. I embraced the opportunity to just be near him. When he leaves – because he learns the truth of my parentage or because of something more mundane like another woman takes him away – I would have these amazing memories to relive.

He kissed me goodnight sweetly on my porch and I waited and watched him ride off.

Unlike the night before, Beth and Seth weren't already in their room when I got in.

"How was the date?" Seth asked before the door had closed behind me.

"Wow, Seth. You've turned into such a girl you're quicker than Beth to ask for gossip!" I feigned surprise and excitement.

"I was chewing!" Beth defended with food still in her mouth. I laughed because I wasn't sure if she was defending her own slowness or her boyfriend's speed.

"Well, girls, it was incredible." I smiled at them both.

"Show me!" Beth squealed.

"Seth, after I show your girlfriend how incredible it felt to kiss my hot date, would you like to see?" My voice came out cattier than I'd intended. Until Beth asked me to use my gift to share my time with Jacob with her I hadn't realized that I had more than one reason for not wanting to show her. Not only did I not want her to figure out who he was but I didn't want to share. At all. I had let Seth go to her without a fight, but there was no way I could let Jake go like that.

Seth turned to Beth with obvious jealousy on his face. Apparently he had an issue with sharing, too.

"Baby, I don't want to see like _that_," Beth whined. "I just wanted to see if Renesmee was even close to as lucky as me."

Seth didn't look appeased.

"Ask her," he sneered, turning his eyes to me. "Ren can tell you _exactly_ how he measures up to me."

Oh, shit. Seth had _never_ brought up our history before; he usually avoided topics that even had anything remotely to do with it.

"Seth, _don't_," I said, my voice low, angry and threatening. I hadn't meant to start an argument between them and wanted to stop it.

I looked at Beth and saw tears welling in her eyes.

Seth looked at her then, too. The jealousy and anger melted off his face.

"Oh, sweetie. I'm so sorry. That was _horrible_ of me. I was trying to make you jealous so you'd know how I felt. I wasn't thinking, and I was _so stupid_. Baby, please forgive me even though I don't deserve it. I love you so much." Seth's words came out quickly and I wondered if Beth would be able to catch them all.

She caught enough of them and then they were kissing and apologizing and kissing some more.

I left them to their private moment, wishing fleetingly that Seth had imprinted on me. I wasn't in love with him anymore – I wasn't even sure I ever had been these days – but I was jealous of his devotion to Beth. I could live for eternity – and likely would – and would never see any love as strong as what a wolf feels for his imprint.

Everyone loves Friday, but no one has ever woken up as happy as I did that next morning. When my last class ended at 5:50, I was going to Jake's. I was going to meet and then go out with his friends and then we'd all go back to Jake's for drinking games. For Jacob, this was going to be an average night. For me, this was going to be heaven.

I rushed back home to change; I would have gotten way too much attention if I'd worn the outfit I was going out in tonight around school all day. I changed quickly into the outfit I had agonized over the night before – while trying to ignore the sounds of Seth and Beth in the other room making up. Again.

The turquoise and silver dress was short and the neckline was low. The boots were phenomenal. I smiled at my reflection before throwing on the grey metallic leather jacket that would help me draw less attention until we were at the club and make it less obvious that I wasn't really affected by the cold.

I hit a little traffic on the way north and groaned inwardly that no matter how fast your car could go – my Roadster flew at 206 mph – or how quickly it could get up to speed –zero to 62 in 3.8 seconds – you would _always_ need an open road. I didn't have one, and I was frustrated. Too bad I couldn't have daddy buy me one.

I pulled up at Jake's just as the clock hit 7:00. Jacob was standing in the driveway of Pete's Auto Body, and he motioned for me to pull my car in.

"There's no way I'm letting you leave that beauty on the street," he chuckled when I was out of the car.

He wrapped his arms around me briefly before going back to lower the large doors of the shop and then lock them. I watched him, admiring the sight of him dressed for a night out. I hadn't realized before but every time I'd seen Jake he'd been in the only outfit I would have imagined he ever wore, loose jeans and a t-shirt. From all the stories I'd heard of him, the addition of the t-shirt was a big deal.

Now he was walking toward me in jeans that were slim fit – snug around his hips but flaring looser over his calves, a shade of blue that was almost grey. His shirt was button-down, white, fitted, and had a single pocket on the front. The sleeves were rolled up just past his elbows and secured there with button-tabs.

Jake knew I was looking at him and his smile spread. I was breathless as I admired him.

"Breathe, Nessie," he sighed into my ear as he wrapped his arms around me.

I wheezed in a breath. "What?" I asked, letting it leave my lungs again.

"Breathe," Jake laughed, stepping back from me, his arms resting on my shoulders.

"I am," I faltered.

He pulled me close again, one hand on my hip, the other under my chin, tilting my face up toward his. "You aren't the only one who can make six dates feel like eternity," he chuckled.

I shook my head slightly. "I never thought that I was," I breathed.

Jacob leaned down and kissed me, but the smile that meant he was pulling away came too soon.

"Let's go eat."

"Werewolves," I groaned without thinking.

Miraculously, Jake didn't seem to catch it.

He locked the regular-sized door behind us, and we strolled down the street holding hands.

We ate at a casual restaurant and stayed chatting for a while after we finished eating.

"The guys are going to explode if we don't get up there soon. I've never brought anyone to meet them before, and they're kind of in shock." He stood up and took my hand.

"Way to put pressure on me there, Jake," I complained.

"They're going to love you, Nessie," he said happily, pulling me along with him.

"Wait! There it is again." I stopped following him just after he'd opened a gate around the side of Pete's Auto.

"There what is?" he asked.

"What did you call me?"

"You were in desperate need of a nickname." His voice was light, full of humor.

"So you nicknamed me after the Loch Ness Monster?" I chuckled, a little disbelieving.

"I'm a werewolf; you're Nessie. Now we're both mythical creatures." He seemed so pleased with himself and my new nickname that I couldn't even think of taking it away from him – or telling him that I already _was_ a mythical creature… or half one at least.

"Nessie it is then," I said with a laugh. "My mom'll hate it but that's never stopped me from doing anything before."

"I promise not to call you Nessie when I meet your mom."

I stifled a laugh and followed him in.

There was a girl with hair purple as a petunia's petals waiting on the landing of the fourth floor.

"This is her?" she squealed when she spotted us.

"Yes, Pete. Please try not to scare her off," Jake laughed.

"She's holding _your_ hand and isn't scared. What could _I_ possibly do?" Pete asked innocently.

I laughed and Jake turned back to smile at me.

"Pete, Nessie. Nessie, Pete."

"Love the boots." Pete was nodding approvingly.

"Thanks. I'd love to die my hair purple or something crazy but I think it would kill my father."

Pete beamed. "Stacey fainted the first time I came home with blue hair."

"Okay, you've survived Pete. Come meet the rest of them." Jake dragged me into the open apartment door on the left.

Jacob pointed around the circle of people as he said their names. "Shawn, Lexi, April, Gabe. Nessie," he added, putting an arm around my shoulders.

We all exchanged casual greetings.

"Are we ready then?" April asked.

"You guys head down. I'll give Nessie the tour and we'll be right behind you."

Jake's friends laughed but shuffled out.

"See you in thirty seconds," Gabe said as he walked out the door.

Jacob gestured at the room around us. "The living room and bedroom." He pointed back down the hall. "The bathroom is that door we passed." Jake waved his hand in the direction of another doorway off of the main room we were in. "Kitchen's over there."

I chuckled, understanding why Jacob's friends thought it was weird that he wanted to show me around.

"And _this_," he added as he leaned down toward me, "is why I made up an excuse to stay behind."

Jake closed the distance between us and pressed his lips to mine.

Just as the kiss was growing more than casual Pete yelled up at us.

"Jake! Make-out later!"

I heard the rest of the gang's snickers.

Predictably Jake's smile spread across his lips before he pulled away.

"I guess we'll pick up later then," I murmured with a sigh.

He chuckled and then pulled me behind him out the door and down the stairs.


	11. Chapter 10

**A/N: Thanks to all who review! And BellaFlan who stepped up to beta when my husband couldn't get step up. Sometimes it takes a woman to show a man how it's done. He gets the blame for the delay!**

At the club, Pete and I stopped at the coat check while everyone else went in to get a table.

"So, Jake tells me he wants to _wait_," Pete said meaningfully to me as we waited in line.

I felt the blood rush to my cheeks. "Lame, right?" I laughed, trying not to sound uncomfortable talking about my sex life – or lack of it – with a near stranger _or_ with the fact that Jake had already talked to Pete about it.

Pete shook her head vehemently. "No. No way. It's the _sweetest_ thing Jake has done since I met him."

I raised my eyebrows, in disbelief as we handed over our coats.

"I don't want to say anything to scare you away, but assuming you were paying attention the day you met Jake then you already know that he's… well… a slut," she finished with a laugh.

I laughed and nodded, looking at Pete as we walked into the main room of the club.

Pete raised her voice above the music. "He wants to make sure you know that you're different and special and that he's not just looking to get in your pants."

"And if I _want_ him in my pants?" I asked loudly.

Pete's eyes grew wide at the same moment I felt Jake's arms come around me from behind.

"What pants?" he snarled quietly into my ear.

"Or skirt," I replied with a light laugh, smiling at Pete as she walked away from us.

"I'm not sure I see one of those either." His mouth was still right at my ear and I shivered at both the seductive rumble in his husky voice and the feel of his hot breath on me.

"You'd better look again." My voice was breathy.

"I can't," he whispered. "If I check you out again in that outfit I'm going to have to take you home and fuck you _immediately_."

"Oh, God," I shuddered. "Please, _please_ look."

"Nessie," he growled, pleading.

"That nickname's growing on me," I breathed.

"I bet it is," Jacob whispered behind me, sultry and sly.

I caught a glimpse of Pete, Lexi and April headed toward us through the crowd and Jake must have too because his arms tightened around me.

"Time to dance!" Lexi said excitedly when they were close enough.

"The boys don't dance unless they absolutely _have_ to," April explained, taking my hand and trying to pull me from Jake.

"Maybe she doesn't want to dance," Jake offered.

I shook my head and tried to step away from him. "I love to dance."

"We're not going to steal her, Jake." Pete pried Jake's hands away from me.

He growled but smiled at her.

When I was free, April pulled me to the dance floor, with Lexi and Pete just a step behind.

We'd only been dancing for a minute when Pete moved closer and whispered in my ear. "I've never seen him like this. Not even close."

When she pulled back I scanned the tables, looking for Jacob.

Pete laughed and moved closer again. "You can't feel the fire shooting out his eyes at you?" She pointed to a table I hadn't spun far enough to see yet.

Jacob's eyes _were_ blazing heat as he watched me dance with his friends. I kept my eyes on his as I danced, trying to imagine that there were no other dancers – and no distance – between us.

Just when I thought I had perhaps convinced him to come join me after all, I felt hands on my hips.

I spun around to see who was trying to dance with me. He smiled when I faced him and yelled, "I'm Zach," over the music.

"I don't want to dance with you, Zach." I took a step away from him, closer to Jake's friends.

Zach stepped closer to me and shouted, "Just one dance, beautiful."

I heard Jake's low growl at the same moment I felt his arms come around me from behind. "She said 'no,'" he growled.

Zach held his hands up, palms out. "It's cool, bro. I didn't know she was taken; she was dancing all by herself."

"I don't have to be with another man to have the right to turn you down," I spat.

Zach was already backing away and turned around to leave faster without another word.

I twisted around to face Jake, his arms staying around me. "I could have handled that," I said lightly.

"That was the kind of guy who wouldn't have left you alone until he knew you were taken."

"I'm taken?" I asked, feeling a smile spread across my lips.

Jacob leaned down and whispered in my ear. "Let me make myself more clear. I want you, Nessie. In every way a man can possibly want a woman. I would be a fool if I tried to rush anything with you. And I would be a fool if I let you get away. As long as you have no dispute, you are, very much, _mine_."

My heart fluttered wildly and felt as though it were doing somersaults in my chest. "And does that make _you_ mine, Jacob Black?" I whispered back.

He chuckled at that. "Ness, I've been yours since the moment I saw you. You can choose to stop being mine but I'll still be yours, even if you don't want me."

"I want you," I smiled.

Jake straightened back up slightly to look at me. His face was completely unguarded and the emotions I saw there – love, devotion, adoration, hope – melted through me and I felt my legs start to give out underneath me.

He laughed as he caught me tighter in his arms, stopping my fall to the floor. "Maybe you should come and sit for a while."

I nodded and he helped me off the dance floor.

The table Gabe and Shawn were at was littered with glasses, some full, some not. After helping me sit, Jake smelled a couple before handing one to me.

"Water," he said.

I took a couple of sips and tried to collect myself.

"You okay, Nessie?" Shawn asked.

"I can't be the first girl to swoon while dancing with Jake," I joked, not wanting to share anything of my moment with Jacob.

Gabe and Shawn laughed.

"God, I wish Pete would swoon," Shawn said wistfully.

As though she'd heard him say her name Pete came up to the table and picked up a glass. She drank it quickly and then sat down in Shawn's lap. She turned to kiss him; it was hot and passionate, if brief. She jumped up and headed back to dance with Lexi and April.

Shawn sighed. "I love that girl."

"You guys are really cute together," I smiled.

"Don't tell Pete that!" Gabe laughed.

I looked at Shawn, confused.

"She seems to think loving me is her weakness." Shawn shrugged.

I finished my water and was feeling better. Talking about Pete and Shawn had helped me push the things Jake had said to the back of my mind; I would think about them when I was alone in bed tonight.

"I'm ready to dance again," I said, turning to Jake.

He stood up and held his hand out to me.

"You're coming?" I asked hopefully.

"I can't let you back out there alone, can I?" he laughed.

"I'd argue but I don't want to win this one." I beamed up at him.

I put my hand in his and let him lead me back out to the dance floor, near Pete, April and Lexi.

Jacob spun me to face him and pulled me close, one hand resting just below the small of my back, the other on the swell of my hip. I put one palm flat against his chest, over his heart and the other on the side of his neck.

Effortlessly, we were swaying in perfect harmony to the loud beat of the music. We stayed so close, in such flawless synchronization despite the fast tempo of the music.

The longer we danced, the closer he pulled me to him.

My breath came in rough gasps and my heart thundered in my chest. Our dance was erotic and intimate.

Unthinking, I raised my hand from his neck to his cheek, intending to show him an image of us exactly as we were now less the crowd and the clothes.

I stopped myself just in time. I had never come so close to using my gift on someone who didn't know what I was. It was too easy to be myself around him, he made me so comfortable.

The fear of nearly ruining everything between us was numbing. I tried to smile and moved my hand back down to his neck.

There was no way I was going to be able to keep the truth from Jake for very long. When I'd decided to lie, I had thought it would only be that one moment in the parking lot. And then I had thought I would make it through one date. Here I was at three, my goal constantly being pushed back by my desire to be with him more.

Six dates, I promised myself. I would have Jacob Black in bed before telling him the truth that would keep him from me forever. No doubt he'd hate me for it but the memory would be worth it – he was going to hate me anyway when he found out who I was.

"Lexi and Pete are done," Gabe chuckled from behind me.

Jacob pulled back from me slightly, looking me in the eyes before he spoke. "He means that they're too drunk to stay and they're all going to head back. Do you want to go with them or stay a while?"

"We should go with them." I smiled at him and then stepped back, taking his hand and pulling him toward the lobby.

"What should we play tonight?" Shawn asked as he opened the door to Jake's apartment, towing Pete behind him. The rest of us weren't far behind.

"We haven't played spin the bottle in almost three weeks," April suggested.

I didn't have time to think about April's idea before Jake's reaction staggered me.

"_NO!_" he roared.

When all the eyes in the room turned to him his cheeks turned red.

"I don't think that's such a great game anymore." Jacob was trying to explain his outburst and he still had everyone's attention. "If you guys wanna play, you can go over to Pete's."

"Holy crap, Jake!" Pete laughed. "What do you think's gonna happen? She's gonna kiss Gabe and realize she's in love with him and leave you?"

Jacob shrugged but his cheeks were redder.

"Hey," I started, defending Jake, "can't we just not want to kiss anyone but each other?"

"How about 'I've never?'" Shawn offered, clearly on our side.

I turned my eyes back to Jake and he nodded, still looking embarrassed. I said, "Sure."

Pete went into the kitchen and came back with seven shot glasses and four bottles of tequila. Did seven people really need four bottles of hard alcohol?

We all sat down around the coffee table, Jake's arm rested in my lap with my arm over his, our hands joined.

"New girl gets to start," Lexi declared.

I smiled as Pete finished filling everyone's shot glasses. "I've never had a shot in Jake's apartment."

Everyone laughed and took their shot. April grabbed the bottle to refill this time.

Gabe was next to me, making it his turn next. "I've never kissed Jake," he said with a smile at me.

I chuckled as all of the girls in the room took a shot.

"I've never danced with Jake," April said on her turn.

Pete and I took a shot.

"I've never thought about Jake naked," Shawn said, taking his turn.

I laughed as all the girls took another shot.

"Why's it all about me?" Jake chuckled.

"I think it's all about Nessie," Pete clarified. "I think we're supposed to be getting her drunk. You know, like initiation or something."

"I can't argue with that," Jake laughed.

"I've never been on a date with Jake," Pete continued.

Only I took a shot.

"I've never slept with Jake." Lexi looked proud of herself for being able to come up with another she was certain I would have to drink to.

I opened my mouth to speak but it fell open – as did several mouths around me, including Shawn's – as Pete took a shot.

She set down the glass and looked around at the shocked faces. "What?" she asked. And then, "Oh, _fuck_." Pete buried her face in her hands.

"Nice job you fucking lush," Jake growled.

Shawn stood up and headed for the door.

"It was long before you guys were together, Shawn," Jake called to him, eyes on me with a worried expression on his face.

"When Pete wants to be _fucking honest_ with me, she knows where to find me," Shawn yelled back before the door slammed behind him.

"I think you guys should leave," Jake said to his friends. "It was a long time ago. It only happened once. Not a big deal. Let's not talk about it again."

Gabe, Lexi and April got up and left quietly.

Pete still had her face covered.

"It'll be okay. Go talk to him, Pete," Jake said softly.

Pete finally lifted her head and she glared furiously at Jake. How was this his fault?

"It's not going to be o-fucking-kay!" she screamed. "I _lied_ to him, Jake! When we got together he asked me if we had ever fucked and I told him 'no.' He's not just going to get over that!"

"Yes, Pete, he will. He loves you." Jake kept his voice gentle while Pete raged at him.

"Fuck love! _You _made me do this! You made me give him what was left of my heart and now he's _crushing_ it!" Sobs began to break through Pete's ire.

Jake let go of my arm with a pained look and went to Pete, wrapping his arms around her.

"Pete, I told you to try with Shawn. And I'm telling you the same thing now."

"I can't, Jake," she wailed.

"What choice do you have?" His voice was barely a whisper.

After a moment Pete's near-hysterics began to quiet. "None," she sighed and left without another word.

Jacob looked at me with a look I never thought I'd see on his face: fear.

I smiled at him, not really understanding.

"You're not gonna storm out?" he asked hesitantly after a minute.

I laughed quietly and shook my head. "Why would I?"

He shrugged with a disbelieving look on his face.

"Your past is exactly that. _Yours_. And past. And it's not like you've ever lied to me about it."

I stood up and walked to him, taking his hand in mine. "It's gonna take more that to have me storming out."

Jake looked away from me as he said, "She was my first."

"Seth was mine," I told him.

His eyes were wide as he turned to look at me. "Your best friend is dating the first guy you slept with. You all live together and you're okay with all of that?"

A laugh that good doesn't come along often.

Jake smiled when he finally pieced together how similar that sounded to him and Pete. "We'll have to add that to the list of things we have in common."

I smiled at him and let out a sigh. "I suppose I should go now."

"Why?" he asked, shocked.

I ran my eyes up and down his body, emphasizing how much I wanted him, as if I needed a reminder. "It's your rule, not mine," I shrugged.

Jacob's eyes took their turn to appraise my body and he shook his head. "Maybe you could stay if we got you out of that dress."

I grinned wickedly at him. "I would've thought that was against the rules."

"Good God, woman!" Jake chuckled. "I meant that maybe if you covered up a little more of your perfect body it would be easier to resist the urge to forget about that stupid rule."

"It _is_ a stupid rule," I agreed.

Jacob laughed and went to the dresser near his bed. He pulled out a couple things and tossed them to me. "Go put those on and we can watch a movie or something."

I gave him another smile and went into the bathroom. The cut-off sweats Jake had given me were probably long shorts for him but they were pants on me. I pulled hard on the drawstring before knotting it so they'd stay up. I could've have belted the shirt and worn it as a dress. I looked at my reflection and chuckled. It would be easy for Jacob to keep his hands off me now. With a sigh I knew that at least it would mean I could spend more time with him tonight.

"Damn," Jake said, shaking his head when I came out of the bathroom.

I laughed. "That bad, huh?"

"Bad?" He chuckled once.

I put on a sassy face and strutted to him in the living room, teasing him as though I were in clothes fit for a catwalk.

Jacob sucked in his breath quickly and put his hands on my hips when I reached him. He leaned in and kissed me.

A moment later, he smiled and pulled away his mouth away from mine and moved it to my ear.

"It's like a preview of how incredible you're going to look the morning after our sixth date," he murmured.

Nothing would have made me happier than to convince Jake that the six date rule was absurd. Instead – thinking about what Pete had said – I cleared my throat and took a step back from him. "A movie, you say?"

We agreed on a movie easily and snuggled up together on the couch.

I woke up some time later, on Jake's couch, still cuddled in his arms. I tried to get up without waking him but his arms were locked around me.

"Nessie," he mumbled, holding me tighter.

"I should get home, Jake. I don't even know what time it is," I whispered.

Jacob sat up slightly but didn't let go of me. "3:45. The only place you're going is to bed with me."

I opened my mouth to protest then gasped as Jake stood quickly, scooping me into his arms. He used his foot to press a button on the TV to turn it off and carried me to his bed. Jake held me to him with one arm and used the other to pull back the blanket on the bed. He set me down gently before laying down next to me.

"Goodnight, Ness," he said softly.

I knew I should have argued. I should have headed home.

"Goodnight, Jacob." I cuddled closer to him and he put his arm across my stomach. I sighed in contentment and fell back asleep.

**A/N: This is the first time I've been inspired enough to rec a fic (other than BellaFlan's work but most of you are already reading that) but this story is absolutely amazing. I don't even have the words to praise it properly. My face literally aches from smiling so much while reading.**

An Introduction to Swirl and Daisy

A first kiss, a first dance, a first curse word shared between best friends. This is the tale of a boring young geek and the social pariah who thought the world of him. A tale of growing up. A tale of a Non-Romantic Romance.

**http://www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/s/5642262/10/An_Introduction_to_Swirl_and_Daisy#**


	12. Chapter 11

**A/N: Thanks to my husband and beta! Sorry this one took so long… you should have seen all the work he did to it!**

**When writing the end of this I listened to Jim Sturgess' version of The Beatles' "Something" on repeat. I highly recommend it. You'll know when. Did I mention that this story contains themes not suitable for underage readers?**

**Also, another special thanks to BellaFlan for her help and persistence!**

The sun streaming thought the windows of Jake's small apartment woke me. I was disappointed to find myself alone in his bed. I sat up and called, "Jake?"

I got up when there was no response. I wandered around the apartment for a few minutes, making sure Jake wasn't around. Unsure what to do with myself or where Jacob could be, I stood in the living room while I thought.

The door burst open and a greasy, messy-haired, ecstatic Jacob bounded toward me. He was wearing oily mechanic's coveralls, but he didn't hesitate before scooping me into his arms to plant a sloppy kiss on my mouth.

I was laughing when he finally set me down. "Good morning?" I asked.

Jake nodded before kissing me again.

I giggled as he smiled and pulled away; Jake's joy this morning was contagious.

"I want you to stay but you should probably go home and get clothes for tonight and tomorrow while I'm at work." Jake ran his hand through my hair. "And you'll probably need to wash the grease out of your hair," he chuckled.

"Thanks," I teased, not really minding at all. "Tonight and tomorrow?"

He beamed. "Dates four and five."

Jake poured a bowl of cereal for me. As I ate, we talked about what Jake had planned so I would know what clothes to bring.

"I have to get back down there. Stacey and Pete have probably covered your car in drool by now. I'll have to get it cleaned while you finish eating. Feel free to wear the sweats home." He grinned seductively. "Then I'll have something at your place when I need it."

Jacob kissed me goodbye before heading back down to the garage.

I'd seen Jake happy before but never quite like that. I wondered if this was the Jacob Black my mother first befriended – the one indifferent to his own heritage.

I finished my cereal, washed the bowl and spoon, gathered up my things, and headed downstairs.

In the garage, I made eye contact with a man in coveralls who had to be Stacey and I quickly tossed him my keys. "Jake gets a break while you take my baby for a ride," I offered.

Stacey clapped Jake on the shoulder as he walked by him and climbed in the driver's side. "I like her," he declared.

Jacob laughed, shaking his head at Stacey, and came to wrap his arms around me again.

"Aren't you the least bit worried about giving your car to a man you technically haven't even met yet?" he asked, pulling me close to him.

I smiled as Stacey pulled out of the garage quickly but carefully.

"What's to worry about? He's a mechanic and he knows you." I poked him gently in the chest. "You're just jealous you haven't gotten to drive her yet."

Pete laughed from under a nearby car. "How does this girl know you so well already, Jake?"

"I'll have you both know that there is nowhere I'd rather be than right here." Jacob bent and kissed me with a little more passion than a man should kiss a woman in public – not that I would ever complain.

Jake groaned and pulled away from me – with a smile – when we heard my car returning.

As Stacey climbed out I smiled at him. "Pete can take her for a spin too if I can keep Jake a little longer,"

Stacey tossed the keys to her with an easy smile. "You can finish up whatever Jake doesn't get finished."

Pete didn't complain as she hopped in the car. She seemed happy this morning, and I hoped that meant that she had sorted things out with Shawn.

Jacob's smile spread wider before he pressed our lips together again. Stacey found something he needed to do under a car, giving us semi-privacy. We kissed slowly, as though we had all day to do nothing else.

When Pete came back Jake smiled, pulled away and then sighed.

Pete tossed me the keys with a smile. I dangled them in front of Jake. "You want your turn now or later?"

He raised his eyebrows. "I can be patient."

"I'd better let you all get back to work then." I smiled at Stacey and Pete and leaned up to give Jake one more brief kiss. "See you in a few hours."

I climbed in my car and started her.

"Jake, you will lose your right to call yourself a man if you fuck this up," Stacey said, assuming I couldn't hear.

Jake shot him an easy smile. "I am _not_ going to let her get away."

Pete laughed. "The car or the girl?"

Stacey and Jake joined in her laugh. "Neither," they said in unison.

They were still laughing as I drove away.

At home, I rushed through showering, eating lunch, getting ready and packing only to find that I still had several hours before Jacob would be done working. I dove into homework, hoping it would be able to hold my focus.

Walking the line between leaving early in case of traffic and leaving ridiculously early, I couldn't wait any longer and I left, thankful I hadn't seen Beth or Seth.

I didn't hit any traffic on the way and felt a little silly pulling back into the garage so early. Stacey looked happy to see me, motioning for me to park in a different spot than I had been in before.

"Hi, Stacey," I smiled, climbing out of the car.

"Nice to have you back so soon," he smiled back.

Pete rolled out from under a car and waved to me with a wrench in her hand. "Jake's not back yet, but I'm sure he won't care if you go up."

"Where'd he go?" I asked.

"Mt. Tam Park. He runs up there a couple times a week," Pete answered as she rolled back under the car.

I smiled, wishing I could see Jacob's wolf.

"I don't know why he doesn't like to run in the city," Stacey criticized.

I laughed at the idea of Jake as a wolf running down the streets of the city.

"Some people like trees and nature and all that crap, Stace," Pete defended from under the car.

"Whatever works, I guess. That boy does nothing but run twice a week and he's built better than I was when I was working out at the gym every day." Stacey shook his head. "You're welcome to hang out here or head up to wait."

"I guess I'll go up." I got my suitcase out of the trunk.

"Moving in?" Stacey teased.

"It takes a lot of crap to look this good every day," I joked back.

"Well, like I said before, whatever works." Stacey walked with me around the corner to open both the gate and the door to the lobby. "Jake's door'll be unlocked."

"Thanks, Stacey," I said with a smile.

"You need help with your stuff up the stairs?" Stacey offered.

"Nah, I'm fine." I headed up the stairs, carrying the heavy bag easily.

I put my things down near Jake's dresser and sat down on the couch, not sure what to do with myself while I waited. I should have stayed at home longer although I would have been just as anxious to see Jacob.

I lay down with my head on the armrest and let myself enjoy thoughts of Jake. Tonight would be date four. He wanted me to sleep over again though we would only sleep. Tomorrow would count as date five. Not to mention we'd have the whole day together. We hadn't made plans for date six yet. Well, there was one thing I was pretty certain we'd be doing but I assumed there would be some other date activity first. Would we make plans for during the week? I'd rather we be able to spend the whole night together after our first time. But I didn't want to go all week without seeing Jake. Had he already thought about this?

I sat up quickly when the door burst open and an exuberant Jake rushed into the apartment. I barely had enough time to sit up as Jacob jumped over the back of the couch and landed right next to me.

I laughed quickly at the sight of him exactly as I had always pictured him. Shirtless, shoeless, cut-off jeans, dirty, shaggy-haired, and grinning like he didn't have a care in the world.

I expected to be swept up into another kiss like this morning but instead Jake put one hand on each side of my face and simply looked down at me.

"Did you miss me?" he asked quietly.

"I'm back early, aren't I?"

Jacob nodded, a soft smile on his face.

"Who goes running without a shirt or shoes?" I teased, knowing I shouldn't. It wasn't fair to make him squirm just because I knew more about him than he was aware of.

"I leave them in the car." He shrugged. Obviously I wasn't the first person to ask him that question. I'd bet he did have an extra shirt and shoes in his car, though he would never need them for running.

"Sure, sure," I replied with a chuckle.

Jake leaned down slowly, and I anxiously awaited his kiss. Instead, he moved his mouth to my ear and whispered, "I missed you too." He kissed my ear and I shivered.

His breath blew across my ear in a confident chuckle. "Cold?" he teased.

I opened my mouth to give him a sarcastic comeback but only breathed, "Kiss me."

With another quiet chuckle, Jacob granted my request.

Jake and I enjoyed dinner together and then went back to his house to get ready to go out with his friends again.

I put on a pair of very low rise jeans that were worn in all the chic spots and a black halter top that left a slim crescent of my stomach bare. I zipped on my favorite knee-high black leather boots.

Pete and Shawn were already in the living room, laughing about something with Jake.

"Damn, Nessie," Shawn said appreciatively as I walked in the room.

Pete whistled at me and I winked at her.

Jacob spun around and his eyes raked me over several times before a small, sinful smile spread across his face. "Mine," he said firmly as he closed the distance between us.

He wrapped his arms around me and I cuddled myself against him. "Yours," I sighed.

Jake's arm tightened, pressing me closer against him.

"Let's go before this gets worse," Pete said, exasperated.

Jacob shifted so that only one arm was around me. "We can finish later," he chuckled, pulling me with him to the door.

At the bar Jacob and his group of friends seemed to know not only everyone behind the bar but nearly all the customers too. It seemed like the kind of bar that survived on regulars frequenting it rather than a new crowd every night.

Jake introduced me to everyone and laughed as every pair of eyes grew wide when he called me his girlfriend. Obviously it wasn't something they'd heard from Jake before. Not counting the dozen or so women who looked jealous, everyone seemed to think it was a pleasant surprise – the girl who could finally tame Jacob Black.

We weren't at the bar long before Lexi was drunk and ready to head back. I wondered how someone who drank so often managed to get drunk before I did; I had a low tolerance for alcohol – a fact that would have boggled Carlisle, no doubt, had I ever felt such information was appropriate to share with my grandfather.

We left the bar together, the same group as the night before – Jacob, Pete, Shawn, Gabe, Lexi, April and myself. The short walk home was pleasant, accented frequently by laughter.

Back at the house we decided to watch "The Forty Year Old Virgin." Everyone had to take a drink whenever one of six things happened: 1) Sex was mentioned and/or shown, 2) Anyone drank or smoked, 3) Andy's collectible toys were shown or mentioned, 4) Anyone said 'virgin,' 5) Dave talked about Amy, and 6) Paula had a one-on-one talk with anyone. Knowing the movie and how many times we would all be drinking I knew I would be drunk well before it was finished.

None of us really watched the movie, laughing and joking the whole way through.

"Jake!" Pete yelled out of nowhere when the movie was about halfway through.

"What?" he laughed at a normal volume.

"You're the only one not drunk!" She was still yelling.

"I usually am," he laughed, speaking even lower to counter Pete's noise. Processing what she'd said he leaned down to look at me in his arms, a slow smile creeping onto his face. "Drunk, Ness?"

I smiled and nodded my head, setting the room spinning a little.

"Drink!" April shouted, apparently still paying attention to the movie.

Everyone took a drink. Jake managed to do it without looking away from me.

"Jake!" Pete yelled again.

"What?" he asked, laughing harder this time.

"You have to get drunk too!" Pete stood up and stumbled her way into the kitchen. She came back out with two bottles of tequila and set them down in front of us.

"Drink!" April laughed again.

We all took another drink from our beers.

"No, Jake!" Pete scolded at high volume. "You have to switch to tequila now!"

"Shhh!" Lexi said, laughing.

"Jake's not drunk!" Pete replied, not lowering her voice at all.

"Sweetie, Jake doesn't usually get drunk with us. Why's it something to yell about tonight?" Shawn added, a laugh in his voice as well.

"Cause Nessie's here and drunk and it'll be a better memory if we're _all_ drunk!" Pete decreed, somehow managing to _raise_ her voice.

"Alright, alright already, Pete," Jake chortled. He picked up one of the bottles of tequila and took a long drink.

Pete smiled at him and sat down, clearly appeased.

When the movie was over we'd gone through an entire case of beer and three bottles of tequila. Did they really drink like this every night?

My head was swimming – in a good way – and I would not have chosen to be anywhere in the world other than right where I was – in Jacob's arms.

The gang didn't hang out very long after the movie ended – Jake's not-so-subtle hints at them to leave didn't escape my notice.

"Your friends are great," I said, slightly slurred, when the door closed behind the last of them. "And I'm glad Pete and Shawn made up."

"I knew they would. He's head-over-heels for her." Jake smiled, thinking of them. "When am I going to get to meet your friends?"

Drunk though I may have been, I hadn't forgotten the need to lie to keep Jacob in my life. "Soon. I haven't even see them all that much lately myself."

Jacob picked me up and spun me around, planting me in his lap with one leg on either side of him. I thought he would kiss me or say something but he just looked at me.

"I think I'm falling for you, Jacob Black," I whispered as we stared at each other and instantly cursed the alcohol for making my tongue so loose.

His face lit up. "You better be, Renesmee Masen. Landing at the bottom alone would hurt." Jake lifted one hand to my face and ran it along my cheek.

I bit my lip, trying to stop the ridiculous grin I could feel spreading across my face.

Apparently I didn't like looking at Jake as much as he liked looking at me – though I _loved_ to look at him – because I was the first to cave and leaned in to kiss him.

His mouth opened to mine immediately though we kissed gently at first. The heat whenever Jacob and I connected was unlike anything I'd ever experienced, and it quickly took over.

The kiss deepened and Jake's hands began roaming my body – hips, thighs, stomach, ass, back, hair, face, neck, arms, breasts – alternating tender and rough. Moans escaped my lips whenever his hands hit the best spots.

My own hands began to explore Jake's face, hair, and chest. The cloth under my fingers didn't satisfy me and soon my hands were undoing his buttons. When I had them all undone Jake helped me by shrugging out of his shirt.

I let my hands enjoy their reward before deciding that Jake's hands were doing such a wonderful job that they deserved a prize as well. I broke the kiss to remove the halter top I had on.

Jacob sucked in a breath as his eyes landed on my nude breasts. I looked at him and saw fire in his eyes as he stared at me.

With a low growl Jake smashed his face to one breast while one hand came up to grab the other.

"God, Jake," I moaned. I pressed myself further down into his lap.

Jacob pushed me off of him, off the couch, onto my back on the floor. He was on top of me, his mouth at mine again, in a heartbeat.

He lowered his hips to press against me, and the friction of his hardness against me made me scream his name.

Jacob smiled, his lips still against mine, and I feared he was going to stop this. When he pulled back I could see that this wasn't the easy, pleasant smile that I was expecting. This smile was eager and licentious.

Jake's mouth crashed back into mine with a new fervor. He was holding himself above me with one hand while the other deftly unfastened my jeans. Breaking the kiss again, Jacob sat up and used both hands to pull my jeans down. I lifted my hips to help him.

"I want you, Jacob," I breathed as he took in the sight of me wearing only my panties.

Slowly, hesitantly – as though he were arguing with himself – he shook his head. "It's too soon." He looked thoughtful for a moment, eyes still on me, then he continued. "Maybe we can make a deal though."

"Deal?" I asked skeptically.

He smiled, gaining confidence in whatever he had in mind. "Sex Friday. Everything but until then. That way I can still see you this week and get to spend the whole night with you after our first time."

"You're trying to push back the six date deadline to whatever number date Friday will be? But you're not going to make me get up and put clothes on now?" I asked, clarifying.

As he nodded, I thought about this new deal. It would mean having _some_ of Jake now but that it would be longer till I could have _all_ of him. Instant partial gratification for delayed complete gratification? Either way, I knew I would have Jacob Black in bed soon enough. I'd kept up the lies so long that I had gained confidence in my ability to keep it up.

The alcohol still in my system made the decision for me. In answer, I sat up to kiss him again, my hands undoing his jeans before my mouth even reached his.

Jake chuckled and growled, "Good choice," against my mouth.

I slid his pants down, breaking the kiss to get them all the way off. I smiled at the sight of Jacob naked in front of me. I felt like I had just _known_ he would be neither a boxers nor a briefs kind of man.

"Everything but?" I asked, my voice breathy as I stood up.

Another smile grew on Jacob's face as he nodded to me.

I moved back to the couch and stood next to it as I jerked my head in its direction. "Come here."

He obliged me and sat down on the couch. I looked at him for a moment, truly in awe of him. As he gazed back at me I worried – for the first time in my life – that I might not be enough. His other worldly beauty outshone mine.

"Renesmee, I have never seen anything more beautiful than you," he sighed.

And just like that he'd cured my fears. I was beautiful and, if not for all the lies I'd told him, good enough for him. Maybe if I had been born human, I could have kept Jacob forever.

He held out his hand to me and I didn't hesitate to take it. I was drawn back to him even before he pulled on me gently. I straddled him again placing my hands on his shoulders, this time our bodies only separated by my underwear.

When I leaned down to kiss him I brushed against his erection. I moaned while he sucked in a breath. I rocked against him and kissed him soundly.

I moved myself against languidly, my tongue finding his and caressing it at the same pace. Jacob's hands kneaded my breasts firmly but kept rhythm with my rocking.

The frantic passion we'd had early seemed to have disappeared, replaced with a patient passion. Perhaps agreeing to find some relief for us both had given us all the time in the world.

Despite the slow tempo, I felt pressure building inside me. I kept going steadily until my orgasm flowed through me, out of me, and into Jacob. My mouth broke away and I rested my forehead against his, panting as the wave surged through me. Jake's hands left my breasts for my hips as he helped me keep going, keep rubbing against him, picking up the pace fractionally. My bliss didn't fade as I was overwhelmed by this gentle and enduring climax.

I was still out of my mind with pleasure when Jacob grunted softly, as his seed struck both of us. Our movement stilled and I felt myself begin to come down from the high I'd been riding.

I pressed my lips firmly to his before climbing off of him, moving to sit next to him on the couch. He got up and quickly scooped me into his arms, one hand on my back and the other below my knees. Smiling, I laid my head on his bare chest as he walked us to the bathroom.

He set me down and I let myself fall backward to lean against the wall feeling completely exhausted. Jacob got a washcloth and ran it under warm water before kneeling down to clean his ejaculate off of me tenderly.

I smiled down at him as I watched him, my eyelids feeling heavy. After cleaning himself as well he picked me back up and carried me to bed. My eyes were closed before my head hit the pillow.

"Sleep now, beautiful girl," Jake whispered before kissing my forehead.

"Thank you," I mumbled and was asleep the next instant.


	13. Chapter 12

**A/N: Thanks to my Mister Beta who, for the first time in 101, told me he really liked this chapter.**

**Apologies in advance to any puppies that may take offense to the following!**

**Adult content below!**

My dreams that night, as I lay satiated in Jacob's arms, were erotic to say the least. I woke several times with shudders, ghosts of the orgasm I'd enjoyed the night before. I don't know if Jake knew what disturbed me but he held me closer as I drifted back to sleep after every time my body convulsed.

I woke again with another tremor, this one stronger than the others. My eyes flew open with the explosion of it, and I cried out though that may have only been in the dream. Jake was propped up on one elbow watching me.

"Whatcha dreamin' 'bout?" he asked innocently, a smile playing at the corner of his lips.

"Puppies," I smiled sweetly as my breathing and heart rate returned to normal.

"Puppies, huh? I had no idea you felt so… _strongly_ about them."

I nodded. "What's not to love?"

"You want a puppy?" he flirted, leaning down closer to me.

I nodded again, my breathing picking up again as he got closer.

"I'll give you a puppy, honey," he whispered huskily. Jacob closed the distance between us and pressed his lips to mine.

Still on his side next to me, he pulled me flush against him as his tongue dipped into my mouth. The sheet had gotten wedged between us and we both squirmed around until our bare chests touched, my panties the only thing separating us once again.

I reached one hand down and wrapped it around his erection.

"Oh, fucking god," he groaned, breaking our kiss for only a moment.

I stroked him slowly and he began to thrust into me. I lifted my top leg and then slid him between my legs.

His hardness rubbed back and forth along my clit wonderfully. With my dreams so fresh in my mind and my body already remembering how good it could feel with Jacob so close, it only took me a moment to come again.

"Oh, Jacob," I sighed, both of our movements slowing.

Jake's huge smile was infectious. "I think I see what you mean about puppies." He pulled back from me, getting a better angle before slipping his hand down and cupping me. "You passed out on me last night, Ness. I need to touch you."

I lifted myself somewhat gracefully and slid my panties off. "Then touch me, Jake. I'm yours to do with as you please."

He moved down on the bed and spread my legs wide open. He settled himself between my legs, gazing up at me from directly in front of my center. "I've never been happier to know something was mine."

Jacob rocked forward swiftly, firmly pressing his tongue flat against me. "Fuck!" I cried out. Ever so slowly he licked me, twice, down and back up again, keeping the pressure on. His tongue darted inside me, making me cry out again. He thrust it in and out at another languid pace. The juxtaposition of speeds sent my mind reeling.

I felt his fingers on me, spreading me open for him. A finger dipped inside me and his mouth moved up to gently lick my clit. He added another finger and then curled them inside me. He started to suck on my clit, and I climaxed again.

I grabbed onto his shoulders and pulled him up to me. I kissed him hard, tasting my come in his mouth. He moved above me, and I felt his erection hit my thigh. "Oh, god. I want you, Jake."

He moved himself quickly so I couldn't feel his lower half against me. "I know, honey. I want it, too."

"They're going to be the best of friends. Doesn't it seem cruel to keep them apart?"

I expected him to be weakening to my plea – and he was – but he looked so conflicted and I felt guilty. It was inevitable that Jacob would regret being with me, but I didn't have to make it worse than it already would be.

I pushed him off of me and onto his back.

"There's someone else I want him to meet," I told him as I moved down the bed.

I smiled at him as I lowered my mouth to his cock. I kissed the tip and whispered, "It's nice to meet you."

I looked up and he was staring at me, adoration in his eyes. I licked once, quickly from the base to the tip before taking all of him into my mouth slowly. "Nessie." He groaned my name as I moved up and down over him. I sucked hard and brought one hand up to cup his sac gently before moving it to the base of him that wasn't fitting in my mouth.

I slid my teeth along him once. He bucked his hips, and several obscenities flew from his lips. I moaned with my mouth still around him, making him curse several more times.

Jake's hand gripped the back of my head and he pushed me onto him faster. Just before he came he tried to pull me off of him, tugging my hair roughly when I refused to let go of him. I moaned again, enjoying the dull pain.

"Oh, god, yes!" he grunted and I slid him as far into my mouth as I could. His semen shot down my throat before I slowly pulled off of him.

I flopped down backwards on the bed, my head at the foot of the bed.

"We're going to have to get out of bed at some point." Jake sounded tired but happy.

"Why?" I whined.

"Werewolves get hungry," he answered.

I chuckled, though not because I thought he was funny – which I'm sure is what he assumed. I found it funny that he wanted to continue this game. Did he ever plan on telling me that he was serious? No, of course not. He couldn't; he would only be able to tell his imprint. Unless being away from his Alpha for so long had made him immune to old orders somehow.

"Let's get you fed then." I got out of bed. "You're going to need to keep your strength up."

I wandered into the kitchen without bothering to dress. I opened the fridge and peered inside as Jake's arms came around me from behind. He hadn't bothered with clothes either.

"Am I?" he asked, his mouth at my ear.

"Mmm-hmm." I pulled a container of juice out, shutting the door and turning to get a glass. Jake stayed glued behind me, following me around the kitchen.

"Jake, you guys wanna do something today?" Pete's voice called as the front door opened.

"Naked!" Jake called back.

"Shit! I'm sorry you guys!" Pete's footsteps retreated back down the hall. "Come over when you're dressed."

I laughed as I poured my glass of juice.

"Pete's used to having free reign around here; I'll talk to her about it." Jake picked up my juice and drained it.

I twisted my head around to glare at him and he beamed at me. I sighed, losing my anger at his happy face and filled the glass again.

"Pete doesn't bug me," I said lightly before drinking my juice.

"It would bug _me_," Jake admitted.

I tilted my head back and looked at him upside down above me. "You're cute."

With a smile Jake bent forward and kissed me briefly. "Wanna go see what she wants?"

I grabbed a pack of Pop Tarts from the counter and opened them, handing one to Jake as I bit into the other one. "Sure."

Jacob's snack was gone before we made it to the other room to get clothes. He threw on a pair of shorts and nothing else. I grabbed one of Jake's discarded t-shirts from the floor and put it on. I saw Jake smiling at me as I pulled on panties.

He grabbed me and pulled me to him roughly. "You make me so happy."

"Jacob Black, I've _never_ been this happy before." It was easier to admit with my face against his chest.

Jake pulled me back enough to look at me and bent down to kiss me sweetly.

"Let's go see what Pete wants," I said after Jake smiled and broke the kiss.

"Pants?" Jake asked.

"A girl doesn't usually wear pants with a dress," I laughed, pointing out how long his shirt was on me.

Jacob shrugged with a smile before taking my hand and leading me across the hall, opening Pete's door without knocking.

Shawn and Pete were cuddled on the couch watching TV.

"Nice outfits," Shawn laughed when he looked over his shoulder.

"How many dates did you guys have last night?" Pete teased.

I cleared my throat. "The rule was _no sex_."

Jacob squeezed my hand and gave me a smile when Shawn and Pete laughed.

"Pete thought Nessie might want to do some touristy stuff in the city today," Shawn said when they were through laughing.

Jake looked at with me with his eyebrows raised.

I nodded encouragingly. "I've only been to a few clubs and bars with friends from school before I met Jake."

"Go get more clothes on then!" Pete smiled.

"You want a shower?" Jake asked as we crossed back to his apartment.

"Will you join me?" I stepped into the bathroom, tugging Jacob with me.

"If I get in there with you we aren't gonna get anything else done today."

"I promise you'll have a good time."

"I don't doubt that," he chuckled. "I'm gonna go use Pete's shower."

I frowned at him but let him go.

By the time I finished showering, Jacob was already back in the main room of his apartment, watching TV fully clothed.

He shut the TV off and turned to face me as I walked toward my things to choose something to wear. I pulled clothes out and tossed them on the bed. Jake's eyes were still on me as I dropped my towel to the floor.

He was on his feet in a heartbeat and stalking his way to me. I expected him to be lust-filled and passionate when he reached me and, though he may have been, he simply pulled me into a tight embrace.

"Pete told me that all women see flaws in themselves but I can't imagine what you could possibly find to complain about," he sighed wistfully as he held me.

"I'm pale."

"Your skin is like porcelain – beautiful and delicate-looking."

"My breasts are uneven."

"My hands are uneven." His chin was resting on my head but I could hear the grin in his voice.

"There's a cowlick in my hair here." I pointed out the spot near my temple.

"And it makes that one ringlet spin the other way. I love that cowlick."

"Those are all my big complaints."

"That was a weak list. Or maybe you were made for me."

I smiled against his chest, but it was bittersweet. If I'd truly been made for him, we'd both know it; he'd have imprinted on me. "And what about you, Mr. Jacob Black? Do you have any flaws?"

"Well, there're my two different-sized hands." There was a smile in his voice again and he pulled back so I could see it. His arms fell from around me and he moved them to cup my breasts. "Though that seems to be working in my favor recently."

"Jake," I sighed as he squeezed them.

"You'd better get dressed or Pete's gonna come looking for us." He bent and kissed me briefly before pulling away entirely. He took two steps back, keeping his eyes on me.

I got dressed while he looked on.

When we were both ready, we went back across the hall to Pete's apartment.

"I won't even complain about how long that took," Pete laughed as we walked in. "I'll just keep enjoying the new and improved Jolly Jake."

"Jolly Jake?" Shawn chuckled. "Is he a Christmas toy?"

"It's called alliteration, Shawn. It sounds better than Happy Jake or Cheerful Jake." Pete had her hands on her hips as she glared at him.

"Why not Joyful Jake? Jovial Jake?" Shawn wasn't going to let her win.

"We'll just have to see what he's like at Christmas," I laughed.

The four of us had a fantastic day in San Francisco. Jacob admitted that he hadn't even seen half the sights Pete came up with for us. We toured Alcatraz. We rode the Powell Street cable cars. We saw Coit Tower and its murals and views. We drove down Lombard Street. We wandered Fisherman's Wharf and Pier 39. I don't know how Pete planned such a full day on such short notice. She said there was plenty more to do but the day was over so it would have to wait.

After dinner on the Pier, we all went back to Jake's. Pete, Shawn, and Jake were going to get ready to go out with their group and I was going to get ready to head home.

"I wish you could stay," Jake complained while I threw my things back into my bag.

"There is one surefire way to bring my father down upon this bliss, and it's to step one toe outside the lines at school," I explained.

"You don't think Daddy would approve of me?" Jake pouted.

I exploded in laughter which made Jake's pout grow. "It's not because you're _you_," I lied. Edward's head might actually explode if he ever found out about me and Jacob Black. "He didn't want me to move so far away for school, and he can't stand not being able to check up on me as much as he'd like. _Any _distraction would be frowned upon. If I don't keep my grades and attendance perfect, he'll pull the rug out from under me, so to speak." Which was true.

"I suppose I should agree with him; school's important." Jacob was still pouting.

I stopped what I was doing and walked to put my arms around Jake. "You know how fathers are; no one is good enough for their little girl. Would it make you feel better if I told you that I was absolutely certain my mother would love you?" I tried not to think about how true that was; my mother _already did_ love Jake, however long ago it may have been.

He smiled. "A little."

"I'd go home after going out with you guys but I need to call them and check in anyway."

"I'll come see you tomorrow after work," Jacob suggested.

"Why don't I come back to the city?" I couldn't risk having Seth or Beth around to see Jake. I wanted more time before my secrets came out. I wasn't foolish enough to think there was any way I could keep them forever – I just wanted as much time as I could get.

"As long as you don't mind the drive."

"Jacob, you've seen my car," I smiled as an explanation. "Besides, you'd hit traffic coming South and I won't going North."

He agreed, and we took our time saying goodbye.

I wasn't even out of the city before Jacob texted me:

_Miss you already._

I texted him back immediately:

_Miss you more._

When I got home Beth wanted all the details. I'd been avoiding her and putting her off for as long as I could. I made her wait just a minute more while I got all the girls at home – Bella, Alice, Rosalie, and Esme – on speakerphone so I wouldn't have to repeat myself. I was already worried about what I could tell, what I couldn't and what things I would have to outright lie about – repeating my story would make it harder to keep the details the same for everyone.

I told them all about the past few days. My mother and grandmother wouldn't want the juicy details – and I left them out – but I knew that everyone would want to know I was seeing someone. They were all afraid I was still hurting over Seth's imprint.

"What are you going to wear tomorrow?" Aunt Alice asked, a hopeful tone in her voice.

With a smile I responded, "What would you suggest?"

"Maybe the Isabel Marant peach silk blouse?"

"Sure, Alice. But I'm wearing it with jeans."

"Nothing with holes," she fretted.

"She's not a moron, Alice," Rose laughed.

"Thank you, Rose."

"Excuse me, ladies," my father interrupted.

"Hi, Daddy," I grinned.

"Hello, Sweetheart." His tone was warm but reserved, and I knew we were about to have a father/daughter discussion.

Everyone else must have picked up on it as well, because Esme, Alice, and Rose quickly said their goodbyes. Even Beth caught her cue to give me a smile and leave the room.

"You seem to feel quite strongly for Jacob," he began.

"I do," I allowed with hesitance.

"He's human."

"Oh, Daddy," I whined. How many times had we had this talk?

"He won't live forever, Renesmee."

"I've heard this all before," I said, annoyed.

"And I worry every time you get attached to a human," he countered. "In a way, when you had Seth it was a relief because he could keep phasing to stay young with you. Now you won't even have him around as your friend since I'm sure he'll stop phasing to age with Beth."

"Daddy, would you like to hear my arguments again?"

I began listing them in my head without waiting for his answer in preparation. The human half of me was drawn to humans. Though I knew I could get nourishment from their blood, it wasn't even a temptation for me, so strong was the pull to be like them. And they were equally – perhaps more than equally – drawn to me. I'd never had a hard time making friends. They were drawn to my inhuman beauty but weren't afraid of my ability to slaughter them if I chose to, like they were of the rest of my family. They didn't see the predator, only the impossible beauty and grace. I knew I would lose them – every human I came to care about – someday. But letting fear of loss stand in the way of my life wouldn't really allow me to _live_ at all. Perhaps I would feel differently in a few centuries and maybe even come to regret my choice. But ultimately it would always be _my choice_.

"No, Sweetheart, though I know you're going through them in your head," he chuckled and then quickly continued in a more serious tone. "I just wouldn't want to see you hurt."

Bella sucked in a quick breath before speaking. "Edward, if they're meant for each other -"

Edward hissed before she could finish her thought. Had she been about to suggest turning him? The thought was amusing on many levels, and I had to stifle a laugh.

"It's nothing like that," I told them. But wasn't it? At least for me… "It's only been a week!"

"Just know there are options," Bella said.

At the same time, Edward spoke. "That's my girl."

"So, I'm gonna go," I chuckled. I wanted to get off the phone before their disagreement got any worse. I knew that my birth had changed my father's opinion of 'his immortal soul,' but he would never jump to the same quick conclusion of turning someone that my mother had. Discussing it would be a waste of time since there wasn't even the slightest chance of turning Jacob Black into a vampire, regardless of our feelings for each other.

We said our goodbyes and hung up.

I checked over my school stuff for the next day and got ready for bed. Climbing in to go to sleep, I clutched my cell phone to me.

As I was deciding whether or not I should call Jacob to say goodnight, I got another text from him.

_Is it too late to call you and say goodnight?_

Wow. Jake nearly had Edward's ability to read my mind – even over distance.

Rather than text him back I called him.

"I was just thinking about calling you," I smiled when he answered.

"Never hesitate to call me, Ness."

"I won't let it happen again," I promised.

"Good."

"Where are you? I don't hear the guys."

"I made them go to Pete's, so I could talk to you in peace."

"They're gonna start to hate me if you push them away for me too much," I worried.

"I'm not and they won't," he chuckled. "They think you're the best thing that ever happened to me."

I sighed.

"They're right," he added after a moment.

Jacob insisted on staying on the phone with me until I was nearly asleep. I finally snapped the phone closed and drifted off less than a minute later.

**A/N: I'm scrapping a HUGE chunk of what I had and having to write from scratch for the next few chapters (then I have more that's good already done). I'll try not to let this slow me down too much, but I promise it'll be worth it. You don't want to read the weird and random filler I had written. **

**The fantastic, brilliant and sweet wordslinger (yep, I called you sweet!) (****http(colon)//www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/u/2129171/**** made two gorgeous banners for this story. Click the links in my profile or modify these ones to see!**

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	14. Chapter 13

**A/N: Thanks to Mister Beta! And to wordslinger who helped out a touch on this one!**

**Another collage: http(colon)//www(dot)polyvore(dot)com/cgi/set?id=17259174**

**Please PLEASE follow the link below and look at photos of Treasure Island if you've never been. I've lived there twice because it's too beautiful to stay away. **

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School the next day seemed to drag, and I couldn't help but realize how time was changing pace based on whether or not I was with Jacob. When I was, days flew by in minutes. When I wasn't, a few classes felt like weeks.

After I got home from school, there were still several hours before Jake would be off work, so I tried to get ahead with school work. I still found myself heading out the door earlier than I needed to, even allowing for traffic.

As expected, I reached the city with time to spare and made a spur of the moment decision to make a stop. I'd passed Cycle Gear from the freeway each trip I'd taken to Jake's, but this time I decided to use my extra time to buy gear to keep up the pretense of being human with the plan to ask for a ride on the Streetfighter.

I picked out a black jacket with pink detailing that had plenty of protection but still managed to look feminine. I chose a matching helmet and was on my way to pay when I spotted a gift for Jacob that I couldn't resist. The jacket was Wolf brand and had a small wolf head logo in white stitching between the shoulder blades.

I pulled up to the shop, still a few minutes early, and Pete waved me into an empty spot in the garage. "Hey, Pete," I smiled as I climbed out.

"Your boy went to catch a shower. Go on up."

I grabbed the bag out of the trunk first and turned to find Pete smirking at me. "What?" I chuckled.

"Not a damn thing, Nessie. I'm just happy Jake found his other half."

"Come on, Pete. The cheesey crap doesn't suit you."

Her face grew more serious, and she stared at me. "Are you just fucking around?" she asked harshly.

"What?"

"I swear to god, if you aren't really in this with him-"

"Whoa, whoa!" I interrupted. "I'm in it, Pete. More than I ever meant to be. I just don't want you turning into a sap." I laughed a little, awkwardly. I hadn't expected a protective speech from anyone about Jacob Black, and certainly not from Pete.

"Don't keep him waiting then," she smiled.

I gave her a smile before making my way to Jake's apartment.

I let myself in and turned to close the door behind me. When I turned back toward the hall, Jacob was standing half in the bathroom and half out, dressed but barefoot, one hand holding a towel to his wet hair. He looked happy in a relaxed sort of way.

"Hi," I smiled.

"Hi," he answered, rubbing his hair with the towel a little before tossing it back in the bathroom.

"Hi."

"Hi," he said again, smiling broader.

"Hi."

"Is this a game where the first one to stop loses? If it was, I'm not sorry to lose if it means you'll quit standing in my doorway and get over here."

"Loser," I laughed and dropped the bag before rushing to him.

We embraced, actually sighing in unison in each other's arms.

"So Pete gave me a talking to," I admitted after a moment.

Jake laughed. "What'd she have to say?"

"Just that I better not be fucking around with you because you're really _in this_."

"God, you're not, are you? Is that your big flaw?"

"No, Jake," I laughed.

He smiled broadly. "Then you don't need to worry about Pete and her PMS."

"I wasn't. I just thought you might want to know your friend was looking out for you."

"I guess she thinks somebody's got to. I've never been down this deep before… not even close."

"I'll look out for you," I promised. "I'm down there with you; it'll be easy."

"I love you."

I was shocked. Not only had Jacob just said the three words that caused many a man to cower in fear, but he'd said them without preamble or hesitation and without any emphasis on the importance of it. Jacob made it seem like it wasn't a big deal, just a fact that he wanted me to be aware of.

"I love you, too." I had hesitated only briefly, the words falling off my tongue without any sense of overstatement. Somehow with Jacob these big declarations seemed slight – not because they were unimportant but because they were obvious truths, worth repeating for emphasis but not to be overdone.

He bent down and kissed me. He made me melt with the chastest of kisses. I smiled with him when he pulled away.

"So what's in the bag?" Jake asked.

I grinned at him and ran to get it. When I pulled the helmet out, I gave him my most innocent smile. "Daddy would want me to be safe, wouldn't he?"

He nodded but argued, "I don't think purchasing the proper gear for riding on the back of your new boyfriend's motorcycle would be exactly what he'd call safe."

I pulled out my jacket next and slipped it on to model for him. I could see he was pleased by the wide grin on his face. Finally, I pulled out the jacket that I'd bought for him. Jacob laughed when he saw it but made no complaint, trying it on right away.

"So… I'm not sure where you're going with all this…" he teased.

"Jacob Black," I scolded playfully. "If I can't have the ride I want, the very _least_ you could do is take me on the Streetfighter."

"_Taking_ _you_ on the Streetfighter would break the rules."

"Alright then," I conceded with a sigh, "let's just go for a ride around the city."

"I think I can do that." Jacob put his shoes on quickly.

Zipping up our coats, we headed out. Downstairs, Jacob climbed on his bike and then looked me over in my new gear. "You have _got_ to be the cutest thing to ever climb on the back of a motorcycle."

"Don't be rude to her, Jake. She's not just any motorcycle."

He grinned at me and then put his helmet on. "And you aren't just any girl."

"Doesn't that make you a lucky guy then?" I put my helmet on as well.

"The luckiest."

Jake held his hand out and I climbed on behind him. I wrapped my arms tightly around him and leaned into his ear to whisper, "I wanna go _fast_."

He nodded and started the bike. "Hold on tight!"

I squeezed him harder and we were off. We rode for a few hours around the city, not saying much but taking in the sights. I loved the feeling of my arms and legs around Jacob; I would never tire of it. Jacob parked the bike and I knew without him needing to tell me that we were taking a break for dinner.

Over dinner Jacob said that he wanted to know more about me, and, though I tried to elude him, I found myself under the spotlight, dealing with questions I couldn't answer with half-truths. I gave Beth's parents' names as my own. I told him that I had no idea how my mother had come up with my unique name. I lied about high school and what my parents did for a living. I heard lie after lie come out of my mouth and felt completely unable to stop myself.

Jacob and I were in love, or claimed to be, but when he asked to get to know me all I gave him was lies. I had known from the start that Jake and I couldn't have any sort of future, but the lies were beginning to ruin the present for me.

I consoled myself with the knowledge that I was only lying because I loved him so much. It wouldn't be much of a consolation to Jacob when he found out the truth, but I clung to it regardless.

After dinner, we stood next to the bike, holding each other for a moment before putting our helmets on.

"Did I really manage to find the only flawless girl in the whole world and make her fall in love with me?" he asked softly.

I shook my head, gave him a small smile and slipped my helmet on. _I've become a compulsive liar!_ I wanted to yell. I wanted for him to know the truth and for his love to be enough for none of the rest of it to matter.

I was manipulating Jacob Black the same as my mother had. I was being just as selfish as Bella had been. At least I was doing it because I wanted him and not because I wanted someone else but was too selfish to let him go. I hated myself for it, but I felt out of control of the lies.

While I berated myself, Jacob had gotten himself situated on the bike and held out his hand. I took it and climbed back on behind him.

It was late evening by then, and much of the commute traffic had dissipated. Jacob got on Highway 80 East, and it wasn't until we got off at Treasure Island that I understood why; as soon as we cleared the overpass we had the most spectacular view of the San Francisco skyline. The sun was setting, the sky lit up in breathtaking colors, and the city lights already twinkling. I gasped and felt Jake chuckle in my arms.

We drove over a tiny bridge and then pulled to a stop near the rocky shore. I climbed down and quickly pulled my helmet off. It took no effort for images to commit themselves in my photographic memory, but I stared as though it did.

Jacob came up behind me and wrapped his arms around me, locking his hands together over my stomach. "I love you, Nessie," he whispered as we watched the sky grow darker blue.

"I love you, too, Jacob."

We stayed until it was fully dark, both just admiring the view and the feel of each other. On the drive back to Jacob's, I held him even tighter, more aware that any moment with him could be my last than ever. How had things spiraled so far out of my control?

I insisted on saying goodbye to Jake without going back into his apartment. The guilt was getting overwhelming, and I needed some time to think. I did my best not to let it show that anything was bothering me, complaining about school and school work.

Beth and Seth were in bed when I got home that night, and I was left to my own internal struggle. Not that either of them could have helped me figure things out; I'd been lying to them, too. I'd been lying to everyone around me. I'd only known Jacob a short time but things between us had progressed so quickly that these lies were monumental.

When I got home from school the next day Beth and Seth were making nachos. I went in to help, stealing a bit of the chicken Seth was cutting up.

"How're things with Jacob?" Beth asked in a sing-song voice.

"Good," I sang back.

"We haven't seen much of you," Seth commented.

"Nope," I agreed lightly.

"It's pretty serious?" Beth was half asking and half telling.

I nodded, trying to keep my ridiculous grin in check but failing.

Seth stopped what he was doing to look at me for a moment. I knew that he wasn't jealous that I had moved on, but he would always be protective of me. He'd started that before I was even born. "Just be careful, Ren."

"I will; I am," I assured him.

"So what's he been doing to try and impress you?" Beth walked closer to me and her hopeful expression gave away that she was hoping I'd show her something.

I hesitated but then put one hand on her and the other on Seth. I projected the image of San Francisco from Treasure Island, letting them feel how perfect I felt with Jacob's arms around me, his scent combined with the salty sea air, and the feeling that I was right where I was supposed to be. "I love you, Nessie," he said in my memory.

"Nessie?" Beth asked, having not heard Jake's nickname for me yet.

"Jacob?" Seth exclaimed simultaneously, a look of recognition on his face. "Jacob Black?"

**A/N: Ah! Chapter 13 is bad luck! Sorry for the shortness… I'm evil and just couldn't resist ending the chapter there! The next chapter will be big and soon to make it up to you! I'll even go one better and give previews of the next chapter to all reviewers! Maybe we can crack 100! Something else with an exclamation point!**


	15. Chapter 14

**A/N: So I promised this chapter would come quickly and be long. I should not make promises. Restructuring had to be done to make this the best it can be though. The good news is the next chapter will be in Jacob's POV.**

**Thanks to Mister Beta!**

**Seth's POV**

As soon as his name left my mouth, Ren confirmed my suspicion by pulling her hands away quickly.

"Renesmee, was that Jacob Black?" I asked calmly. I wanted to be wrong.

She was so worked up that she was nearly hyperventilating. I glanced to Beth who was watching Renesmee, as anxious as I was for her to confirm it.

"You can't tell anyone," she blurted out as soon as her breathing had regulated slightly.

"Oh, holy fuck," Beth breathed.

"Why wouldn't I tell anyone?" I asked gently. I didn't want to freak her out any worse, but I couldn't understand why she had kept this from everyone for so long already.

She shook her head.

"Is it really him?" Beth sounded in awe. "You've been dating _the _Jacob Black, and you didn't tell _anyone_?"

She nodded and repeated, "You guys can't tell anyone."

"How long do you expect to able to keep this secret?" I took her hand. "Show me more, Ren."

Beth grabbed her other hand as Renesmee's thoughts began to drift. Images began to flash by, some of them passing before I could understand them and others lingering. The important things were clear. Ren had most definitely been dating Jacob Black. She'd known it was him the first time they met and lied so that he wouldn't figure out who she was. They'd been… intimate. And they had some pretty strong feelings for each other. They'd practically fallen in love at first sight. But love at first sight was bullshit… unless it was an imprint. I was afraid of what it would mean, but I'd be willing to bet that Jake had imprinted on Renesmee Cullen.

_Fuck_.

I let go of her hand as the images started to repeat themselves, and Beth did the same a moment later. There were about a million different sides to what was going on, and I was having trouble even sorting them all out.

"I need time to think about what this means," I told the girls. "If you want me to consider keeping your secret, Ren, you can't see him again right now. Unless you're going to tell him the truth."

"Seth!" she protested.

"He's my brother, Ren. And you've been lying to him, to me, and to everyone else. I can't just let you go back there and tell more lies. I get that you love him; I do. Just give me some time without any more lies. Please?"

She looked heartbroken, but she nodded. Beth wrapped her arms around me as Renesmee walked back to her room.

"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" she whispered.

I nodded and spoke again when I heard Ren get on the phone. "Yep."

"Wow."

"Yea."

"Why would you keep Jacob from his imprint?" she asked.

"I _really_ hate lies, sweetheart. Also, we can't be sure they're imprinted until we see how they do apart for a few days."

I felt Beth nod. "Are you really not gonna tell anyone?"

"Not for the next few days at least. Whether or not Jacob imprinted on her will make a big difference. There're just so many angles to this. Either way Jake's gonna hate knowing about Ren and me, but if she's his imprint…" I didn't even know how to finish that sentence. "If she tells him the truth, and we're wrong about the imprint, he's probably gonna run again. And no one might ever find him this time. Again, he's gonna be pissed either way… but he'll forgive her if they're imprinted. No one's gonna let _me_ get away with keeping this from them though."

"And what about her family?"

I sighed. "There's so much to that, too. On the one hand, Bella would be happy to see Jacob again. But Edward… he hasn't really missed Jake at all. And that Jacob is with their daughter? I can't imagine either of them liking that. Rosalie's head might actually explode. And the pack…"

"Billy will just be happy to have his son back, even if he brings along a half-vampire imprint."

"If Jake really wanted to be found, he'd have told someone where he was. What if he wants to take Ren and disappear again?" There was so much I didn't know. I knew that a few days wouldn't give me _all_ the answers, but it might give me some.

"Do you think she'd take off with him?" Beth asked quietly after a moment.

"I really don't know."

I slept while the girls were in school on Tuesday, having spent all night awake just running and thinking. I missed the pack, but I'd never been more thankful to be so far away that they weren't in my head. There was still a lot I didn't know, but I'd worked through all the angles that I could come up with and felt ready to talk to Renesmee more – to try and convince her that coming clean was the best route.

I was helping Beth study in our room when Renesmee got home from school.

"She's home," I whispered, my head still nestled in her neck.

"Let's go check on her." Her voice was breathy.

"Mmm-hmmm," I agreed as I gently sucked her earlobe into my mouth.

"Seth," she giggled. She pushed me away and stood up, re-buttoning her shirt.

Alright, so maybe we weren't studying.

I grabbed my shirt and put it back on. We left the room together, holding hands. Ren was in her room so we knocked on her door.

She opened it with a huff. "Are you here to fuck up _another_ relationship for me?" she snapped.

I stiffened, and Beth gasped softly.

"Renesmee," I whispered apologetically, feeling chastened. I knew that I had hurt her when I imprinted on Beth, but she'd always known it was a possibility. And she'd never really acted more than disappointed.

Which meant this wasn't about me. She was bitchy because I was standing between her and her wolf.

"Ren, you know we both want you to be happy," Beth offered softly.

"She knows that, sweetheart." I turned to face Beth. "Would you mind if I talked to Ren alone for a minute?"

"Of course." Beth leaned in and kissed my cheek before disappearing back to our room.

"Don't make this about Beth," I told Ren firmly as soon as Beth was out of earshot.

"Then don't ruin this for me!" Renesmee was throwing a fit, but was it because she was desperate for her imprint or because she was used to getting her way?

"Be fair, Renesmee. I've never meant to ruin anything for you, and I'm not about to start now."

"Are you going to let this go then? Let me handle my own life?"

"You're messing with more lives than your own here."

"Are you jealous, Seth?" she snapped.

"Quit trying to goad me into a fight. You know that I love you and want you to be happy, Ren."

"Then stay out of my business and let me _be_ happy."

"It's my business now too. It's pack business."

She laughed. "Are you jealous of _me _then? Are you sad that Jake hasn't missed you all these years but he's going crazy missing me?"

"He's crazy for you, Ren. Why can't you tell him the truth?"

She laughed again. "Come on, Seth. Seriously?"

"Wouldn't it be nice not to have to lie to him?"

"Of course it would. But I won't get to see him at all if I don't keep doing this."

"You don't know that. If Beth had lied about something and then-"

"Don't," she said, cutting me off. "You can't just go comparing like that. You know how different it is." Her tone lost some of its edge, and she'd started to sound more sad than angry.

"Alright," I agreed, for argument's sake. "While we were dating if you'd lied-"

"About this, Seth?" She cut me off again. "What if you hadn't always known what I was? How would you have reacted when you found out you were dating a half-vampire?"

"I would have freaked out," I admitted.

"Exactly."

"But I would have gotten over it, Ren. It may have taken me some time but I would have realized that who your parents are doesn't change who _you_ are. It wouldn't have changed what we had."

I looked at Renesmee and remembered how good we'd been together. The feelings, the memories… they didn't just disappear when I imprinted. It was more like they'd faded into the background. But they certainly weren't gone.

"Beth is the only thing that could have changed things, Renesmee," I told her quietly. We'd never talked about our relationship since I met Beth. Not since the break-up talk – and that had been a rather abrupt conversation as it was.

"Even still, Seth… Jacob doesn't want anything to do with his past."

"Has he stopped phasing?"

She shook her head, not meeting my eyes.

I knew she got the point, and I didn't need to press it. If Jacob had really wanted to leave his old life behind, he wouldn't be a werewolf anymore.

"Please, Ren. The truth will come out. Don't let him find out some other way."

Renesmee had locked herself in her room after that. She refused to even come out to eat.

On Wednesday Beth and I thought about cancelling our usual dinner out to be home with Ren, but we decided to go since we didn't expect her to talk to us.

"She's going crazy without him," Beth said as soon as we were seated.

"At least now we know. We can tell Ren, she can come clean, and no one has to lie anymore," I sighed.

"We can't tell her!" Beth snapped.

"Of course we can. Once she knows that Jacob _can't_ hate her then she'll be able to tell him the truth."

"Seth, it's just not our secret to tell. I wouldn't have wanted Ren to tell _me _about us. Only a wolf should get to tell that his girl."

"This is totally different. Under normal circumstances, sure. But they're both keeping all these secrets from each other and they don't need to be."

"Well, what about Jacob? How do you think he'll feel if you tell Ren?"

"He might not like it at first but he'll understand that I did it to end all these lies."

"Are you sure? Don't you think it'll just make him angrier if Ren shows up to tell him what she is and that she already knows he's gonna love her anyway?"

"Ren wouldn't use it against him like that…" I trailed off.

"How long have you known her, Seth?" she asked sarcastically. "Yes, she would. At least, she might."

"When you told me about imprinting and what it meant for us… Seth, it's almost like a proposal. You can't do that for someone else. He's gotta do it himself."

I nodded. "What are we supposed to do then?"

"We've gotta let them figure this out for themselves. We _know_ that they'll work it out. Just leave it be."

I almost caved on Thursday and told Renesmee to go visit Jacob. She was miserable and I could imagine how they both felt. But 'thinking it through' was the only card I had to play to try to convince her to tell him the truth. Maybe Jacob would give in first. Maybe he'd decide to tell her everything to explain why he couldn't put up with her bullshit excuses anymore.

The girls were both at school when my mom called on Friday afternoon.

"Hi, Mom," I answered the phone.

"Hi, sweetheart." I knew immediately from the tone of her voice that something was wrong. "I have some bad news."

"What is it?"

"It's Billy. He had a heart attack."

"Is he okay?"

"He's still hanging in there. But he's not going to make it, Seth. He was home alone when it happened. He couldn't get to the phone, and his heart suffered a lot of damage. They expect him to have another heart attack at any time. He won't survive it."

_Jacob._ I had to get Renesmee to tell him or find him and tell him myself. He might not miss his father enough to call, but he's going to regret not having the chance to say goodbye.

"I know how hard this is." Her voice cracked, and she took a moment to collect herself. "I think it would mean a lot to everyone if you came home."

"Of course, Mom," I answered quickly. "I've got something to figure out, but I'll be in touch to let you know when I'll be home."

"Okay, sweetheart. I love you."

"I love you too, Mom."

I knew Ren would be home in half an hour, but I thought about calling her sooner. I decided to wait, feeling like I was gambling with fate. I packed my things and scheduled myself and Beth on a flight later in the evening.

I had just hung up with my mom, giving her our travel arrangements, when Renesmee walked in. She started to head straight back to her room, but I stopped her.

"Renesmee."

She looked at me and knew I had bad news.

"Billy's dying. You have to tell him. _Now_."

**A/N: HUGE thanks are owed to wordslinger who answered about 117 random questions to help make this happen!**


	16. Chapter 15

**A/N: Thank you Mister Beta! More at the bottom.**

I had my phone in my hand, ready to call Nessie, when she burst through my front door. I rushed to her and wrapped my arms around her. For the first time in too many days, I took a deep breath with my nose buried in her hair.

"I missed you so fucking much, Nessie," I murmured, squeezing her tighter.

"I missed you too, Jake. I'm so sorry."

"You're here now. There's no need to be sorry."

"Yes, there is, Jacob. I haven't been honest with you."

I loosened my hold on her just enough so I could see her face. "Are you breaking up with me?" There was only a small part of me that was worried, but I had to be sure.

"No. Never."

"Alright then." I kissed her hard. Nothing else she had to say could be more important than how much it had hurt to be apart from her.

"Jake." She pulled away, panting. "I need to tell you now."

"Nope," I argued, shaking my head. I pulled my t-shirt off and then grabbed the hem of hers. "You can tell me later."

"But, Jake-" she argued even as she lifted her hands so I could get her shirt off.

I cut her off with another kiss. I picked her up, and she wrapped her legs around my waist. I carried her over to my bed where she dropped her feet down and tried to talk to me again.

"Jacob, I think you'll regret it if you don't hear me out before-"

"That's _my_ problem then, isn't it?" I growled, just a little too roughly. I had been without her for too long. I needed to feel her skin on mine to prove to myself that she was really here – that she was really still mine.

She nodded, and I knew she wanted the same thing I did.

I palmed one breast and used my other hand to unclasp her bra.

"Jake, please," she moaned. "Wait."

I bent down and sucked the available breast into my mouth. I pulled on it gently before releasing it. "Do you really want me to stop, Ness?" I put my hand between her legs and cupped her gently over her clothes. "Don't you want me inside you?" I whispered.

"You know I do. But-"

I kissed her again so she'd stop talking. While she was distracted, I unfastened her pants and slid one hand in to massage her clit. I broke the kiss to insist, "Tell me to stop now or drop it until I ask to hear about it." I curled my finger and slipped it inside her.

"Don't stop," she gasped. "Just don't hate me after, Jacob. Please?"

"Never," I promised. Nessie meant everything to me, and I knew that it didn't matter what the catch was; I could never hate her.

She must have believed me finally because she pressed her lips back to mine and unfastened my pants. She slid them past my hips, and I stepped out of them when they hit the floor. I slipped another finger inside her as she took her own pants off.

Nessie leaned into me and moaned as I supported her weight with my hand. I was so tuned into her body that my finger already knew where to apply pressure. Lifting her slightly, I stepped towards the bed. She whimpered when my fingers slipped from the warmth of her body.

"Shhh… let me do this right," I whispered in her ear before lowering her to my bed. The way her hair pillowed around her beautiful face made my heart do funny little jumps in my chest. Her body was so fucking perfect. My hands would never have their fill of her smooth, pale skin. I ran them up her magnificently-toned legs.

Nessie set her ankle on my shoulder and smiled at me, lighting up my world. Her thighs were soft and supple; nestled between them was a soft patch of hair that matched the copper-colored curls on her head. I could smell her arousal already, and I felt my body respond to it, wanting to taste her and take her at the same time. I fought off my own desire to rush; this would be slow and beautiful.

I placed hot, open-mouthed kisses on the creamy skin of her inner thighs. I gently bit down on the soft flesh, fighting the urge to be forceful enough to leave a mark. The breath she exhaled was laced with a sexy moan. I buried my face into her thigh and took a moment to steady myself. Chastely, I pressed my lips to the downy hair at the apex of her legs; she twitched, and it nearly undid me. My hands slid up the sides of her body and grazed her breasts. Her nipples puckered - amazing that such a slight touch could incite such a reaction.

Running my fingers lightly over her raised nipples caused her body to shiver and her eyes to close. I slid my body over hers and was nearly undone again at the feeling of her breasts pressed against my chest.

"Nessie, look at me." I cupped her cheek in my hand and caressed it with my thumb. Her eyes shot open, and I found myself in them. "I love you."

"I love you too, Jacob." My lips melded into her lips; there was nothing else in the world but Nessie and me. I was lost in the rich ocean of sensation of her body, and I would gladly drown in it.

My hand left her cheek and trailed down her neck and shoulders. Her nipple rose up to press against the palm of my hand, and her body arched into mine. Nessie exhaled sharply when I brushed against her folds. I slid two curled fingers into her moistness once again and pressed on the rough bundle of nerves inside. She moaned loudly and jerked in my grasp. Her face was the most beautiful thing. Flushed and twisted with pleasure was how I always wanted to see her.

The soft swollen skin of her clit pulsed against my thumb, and it didn't take more than a few careful strokes until Nessie was panting beneath me. I kissed her deeply as her walls convulsed around my fingers. The scent of her arousal surged, as did my excitement. She rode out her orgasm on my hand, and when I slowly withdrew my fingers, Nessie whimpered in a high-pitched groan that made my cock twitch, desperate to be inside her.

I licked the beads of sweat from her skin as I leaned down to feel the heat rising from her body, taking special care with her flushed breasts. My tongue swirled around her nipples, and her hands dug into my hair, fisting tightly. When I finally made my way back to her mouth, Nessie kissed me hungrily. She pressed her slick center against my erection, further igniting the slow burning inferno inside me.

"I need you now, Jacob. Please?"

I wanted to bury myself in her and lose myself in her tight warmth. As I positioned myself at her opening, my lips claimed Nessie's neck. The pressure against the very tip of my hardness was maddening.

"Please, Jacob," she whined softly. My arms tightened their grip on her body as I finally pushed into her. The heat and softness were too much; every last thought I had flew right out of my head.

"Ah, fuck, Ness." My voice came out breathy and deep. "You feel so good…" This was exactly the kind of special I'd wanted for my first time, and a part of me wished I had waited – though she hadn't either. But this was special on its own. Because it was Nessie. That was all I needed to make it the most special experience of my life.

Her breaths were coming in ragged spurts as I moved inside of her. Nessie held to my shoulders tightly, and her legs formed a vice grip around my waist.

The pillow-like softness and indescribable, wet heat of her slit were encompassing me entirely. So much more than the joining of our bodies, our souls became one. After years of running, I felt at home.

I'd been in such a rush to get inside her, and now that I was there, I wanted it to last forever. I kept a slow pace, but Nessie lifted her hips to meet my every thrust, and the need to release myself inside her was quickly becoming overwhelming.

I reached between us and softly stoked circles around her still-swollen clit. Nessie responded immediately, and her pussy clenched around me. It was those precious contractions that brought my own climax.

Still connected to her, I collapsed on the sheets and tried to catch my breath. She rolled onto her side to face me, keeping me inside her though I'd begun to grow soft. When I peeked up at her, my heart did a back-flip. Nessie's face was pink, her breasts were heaving heavily with her panting breath, and her mouth was set in a tiny grin. I reached up and pulled the tendrils of hair from her face. Her eyes met mine, and she whispered, "I love you, Jacob."

Yeah, she owned me. What could she possibly have thought was more important than _that_?

"I love you so much, Ness. Whatever you wanted to tell me could never change that. Can't you _feel_ how much I love you?"

Her expression changed the moment I brought up whatever secret she'd been keeping from me.

"Jacob, I'm not who you think I am, and I've been lying to you from the moment we met because I knew you'd never talk to me if you knew the truth, but _now_ I _have _to tell you because Billy's in the hospital, and I know you'll never be able to forgive me, but you just _have _to because I love you more than _anything_." Her words came out in a jumble, and it took me a moment to process them all.

"My dad?" was all I could manage to reply. I moved a little further away from her, and my cock finally slipped out of her. I felt the cold, specifically the absence of Nessie's warmth, but my focus was on understanding what Ness was trying to tell me.

She nodded.

"You know my dad somehow, and he's in the hospital?"

She nodded again and then sat up. When she started talking again, her words were flying as fast the rest of her, she'd gotten up, dressed herself and threw clothes at me. "Oh, my god, Jacob. I can't believe I just did that. I mean, that was amazing. But I can't believe I did that while your dad could be dying. What if you miss him? What if you don't get to see your dad again before he dies because I manipulated you into sleeping with me first?" With her perfect nudity covered, I had a marginally easier time grasping what she was getting at.

"He's dying?" I asked, beginning to let her urgency affect me. I put on the jeans and t-shirt she'd tossed on the bed near me.

Nessie went on speaking while I dressed, making wild hand gestures since her hands no longer had the task of dressing herself. "This is like, the worst possible thing to do to a person. I swear that I came here today to tell you. Yes, I was lying before, but your dad was _fine_ before, and the minute I heard, I came here to tell you everything. But then you were _you_, Jake, and how could I resist?"

"Okay, okay," I said, trying to calm her. I would hate myself for not letting her speak before sleeping with her if I didn't make it to Billy on time, but that wasn't _entirely_ her fault. "How do you know my dad, Ness?"

She froze. I think she was even holding her breath. I guess she was worried that whatever it was would really upset me.

"Do you have to know that _now_?" she asked in a soft voice after a long silence.

"Yeah, now is probably a good time to tell me everything." If she would just spit it out, she could quit worrying about how I was going to react.

"_Everything_ is really a _lot_."

"Why don't you start with the part you're worried is going to upset me?" I suggested, trying not to let on that I wasn't taking her all that seriously.

"I'm a half-vampire." And just like that I _was_ taking her seriously.

"A what?"

"My father is a vampire who unknowingly got his human bride pregnant."

"Are you fucking with me?" I wanted so desperately for this to be a joke.

"I wish I were."

"And _how do you know my father_?" My teeth gritted around the words, already fearing the answer some part of me knew was coming.

"My mother knows him well. She was best friends with his son before he ran away."

"No." I shook my head, trying to make her words not add up to a fucking nightmare.

"Bella's my mother, Jacob."

"That's not possible," I argued. Even if everything she'd said were true, I hadn't been away that long.

"Hybrids reach maturity in about seven years." _Hybrids?_

"NO!" I raged. After all this fucking time, how could Bella find a way to fuck up my life _again_?

Nessie started to cry, and it hurt me. But it wasn't enough to kill my anger.

"Just go to Billy, Jake."

She was making sense again, so I listened to her and left.

-({})-

Billy might die. I hadn't seen him in eight years. And now I might not make it home fast enough to get another chance. I had never even called him. I could've. I should've. I've been over Bella for a long time. I _should've_ called. I had been so caught up in my new world – and that world hadn't included anything from my past but a pile of postcards that I sent out every now and then.

Fucking postcards. They were always ridiculous too. I never told him anything about my life. I just kept sending them, thinking that, as long as he knew I was alive, it would be enough. How would that be enough? What had I been thinking?

I hadn't been, and that was the crux of the problem, wasn't it? I never thought about anyone but myself. Years ago I thought about Bella first, put her needs before my own. But even that I had done selfishly and for selfish reasons.

If he had passed and Nessie hadn't been around, would I have ever known?

My mind began to wander to Nessie, and I forced it back on track. I didn't even really know who she was. There were too many questions, too many lies, too many things that weren't even possible. I didn't have time to think about Nessie right then.

Now that it was much too late, and I was somewhere on the highway heading north, I realized that I should have flown home. It would have been faster. But then I would have had to either run to La Push or figure out who would come get me or rent a car or some shit.

Hell, I bet I hadn't even taken the fastest freeway. Highway Five was a more direct route. But I hadn't thought about any of this when Nessie told me Billy might die. I had hopped on my bike and gotten on 101 North. 101 South had taken me away, why shouldn't 101 North take me home?

Home. Could I even think of La Push as my home anymore? It hadn't been for so long. My first memories were from there, of course, but that isn't really what home means, is it?

With a start, I realized that Nessie had become my home. I didn't want her to be. I _had_ wanted to make a life, a home, with her. But I didn't even know her now. I guess I hadn't really known her before, but I had at least assumed she wasn't hiding anything. Now I knew differently. I didn't even know all the details or how many of the things she told me had been lies.

A long time ago, in another life, I had wanted desperately to imprint on someone, _anyone,_ to escape how hurt I had been by Bella's choices. A part of me had wondered, even then, if imprinting would really be better. I was certain that it would take away the pain of Bella, but I had feared that it might open up a whole new set of problems. I took no joy in being right.

Would she tell them that I was coming? Would that be enough for Billy if I didn't make it in time?

There was a text message on my cell phone from Nessie when I stopped to get gas.

_He's holding on. Hurry though. I'm so sorry._

No attempt to explain herself or answer any of the questions she must know I had. If she _had_ told them I was coming, had she also explained how she knew me? Would everyone on the Rez have more information for me? Did I want answers from them? Could I wait for Nessie to explain herself? Would she bother?

I shook my head to clear Nessie out of it again. Everything to do with her could wait. I needed to get to my father before he died. I needed to apologize for leaving, for not really staying in touch, and for assuming he would be fine until I wanted to see him again.

I cranked the throttle. I needed to get there faster.

**A/N: Sorry this took forever and a day. I don't think I'm cut out for updating a fic on the regular. I'm not quitting on you, just throwing that out there.**

**There's only like a chapter or two left here, just so you know.**

**You can thank wordslinger that you've got this at all. Not only is she the pre-reader I need like a kid needs her blankie, she wrote that fine lemon you just read. Turns out I can't handle a lemon full of love… lucky for me I found someone who can and who needed a loving lemon she'd written dirtified. Hence the creation of the lemon swap. Best idea ever. Thank you again, CB!**

**I've become a fic pimp. My sister pimps (****AltheaJams****, ****TwiCharmed****, and ****BellaFlan****) and I have started a podcast to push our favorites. Check out our blog to get your fix! ****http(colon)/twificpimps(dot)blogspot(dot)com/**

**Mad love to ({}).**


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